Member Since: March 14, 2010
Answers: 62
Last Update: November 7, 2011
Visitors: 3748
|
| |
Hi...
My friend smokes pot a lot and he invited me to come to his house this weekend and smoke with him. I've been playing it off this entire time and haven't told him that I've never smoked a joint before. It's kind of embarrassing to just tell him that it's new to me though.
I'm a little iffy on the whole issue. I don't know what to think of it. Should I smoke pot with him? It can't hurt to right? (link)
|
Marijuana is an illegal drug, glorified or not, just like cocaine or heroin. You can develop a dependency. You mention your friend smokes "a lot" and that's a sign of dependency. THC (what's actually IN marijuana) can stay in your system up to a month, depending on your individual metabolism. Which means if you were to get a job, you'd fail a drug test.
And yes, it can hurt you. It can be commonly laced with other drugs, such as LSD (which is an hallucinogen). Many times when marijuana is laced the buyer isn't aware. Some people have severe allergic reactions to it.
So if you feel "iffy" about it beyond the information I've just extended you, my suggestion would be not to do it.
|
Is it safe? Does it make condoms less effective in any way, shape, or form? Any risks?
I'm on the pill, so there's not much risk of getting pregnant (and zero risk at STDs since my boyfriend and I are both STD-free for sure). But I want to use condoms as a back-up so I'd like to know how well this back-up will work.
Any advice on this subject will be greatly appreciated. (link)
|
There's always the risk of the condom breaking from friction.
But more so, you won't be naturally lubricated. The water will wash away your natural wetness which could be uncomfortable.
|
I'm starting college next year.
I have a lot of friends right now who love drinking, getting high, etc. In college, I'll probably be surrounded by MORE people like this.
The problem is I dont' drink and do drugs AT ALL. It's not even that I think it's wrong, I just feel I don't need it. I've tried beer and whatnot before and I didn't like the taste. I've never tried drugs but I don't really feel the need to get high or see a real point to it.
Anyway, how alienated will I be in college? I'm worrying that I'll stand out. Right now it's not too bad; I just don't hang around with my friends if they're going to be drinking and shit. But in college, will it be different? How do I cope? (link)
|
Although college is a completely different ball game than high school, you will not be alienated.
Yes, there are plenty of people that party. Party animals that would even surpass your friends. But not everyone's like that and there are many people who don't do drugs or surround themselves with such activity.
College is more about individual freedom. There's more people, and people who are legal to consume alcohol. So in theory, you will be around more people who choose to do this, but you'll also be around more people who don't.
How do you cope? You'll find people who steer away from it all.
|
i have extremly large breast.
32-e/ dd
and i am 5 foot 1 and not that skinny, just thin and i feel like my boobs r repulsive. there so big and my body is small and im so insecure about them.
im on a really strict die tbecause im trying to loose weight and i hope it helps my breast issue to but idk.
are large breast bad? (link)
|
No. There's absolutely nothing wrong about your body. And if you don't need to lose any weight, I wouldn't recommend shedding a pound, as this can be extremely unhealthy.
What's bad is your self-image. Women come in all shapes and sizes. Some of us are "well endowed" while some of us aren't. You are perfect the way you are. Putting yourself on a strict diet in hopes of no longer being "repulsed" by your breasts is irrational.
Even if you were to stick to dieting, there's absolutely no guarantee you'd lose any weight in your breasts, ever.
|
i recently read online somewhere that theres a trick for guys to last longer.they said if the guy while peeing stops for 3 seconds then starts again and then hold it again for 3 seconds it strenghtens the muscles and will in turn help the guy last longer. i was just wondering if this is true? and if anyone has any other methods of helping guys last longer let me know! thanks
ps. i was already thinking of when getting close to orgasm to stop and do oral stuff and other stuff to her to hold myself off for a while.
anything help will be appreciated thanks again =] (link)
|
What you're referring to are the pubococcygeus muscles, and by doing kegels (exercising the muscles that control the flow of your urine as well as semen) you can last longer. So yes, this is true.
The easiest way to determine how to do it is by stopping the flow of your urine. You essentially tighten the muscle as if you were going to urinate, but are holding it in. You can do this multiple times, anywhere, every day.
As far as other methods to "last longer", focusing on pleasing your partner before you reach orgasm is always a good method.
|
19/f. I live with my mom and my grandparents. I attend university here where I live. I didn't think I was going to like staying here at home for college but I ended up loving my school. I went to an all girls private high school and it was really a refreshing change to be around guys I guess and also to be around people who r not snobby. Basically, I really liked my school and I'm doing really, really well in school. Living at home is a nightmare. I stayed because my family BEGGED me 2 stay. They said they would give me my space and all of that. They most certainly ARE NOT. EVERYTHING is an argument with them. Let's start by saying that my mom doesn't even let me style my own hair. She doesn't even let me wash it myself. She will cry, scream, and throw a tantrum if I don't let her wash my hair. Whenever I have a date, they don't let me drive myself. They drop me off and pick me up. Talk about awkward. They stay at the mall where I go sometimes if its more than 5 miles away from the house. My mom drives me to and back from school. I understand that were sharing the car but I don't think its necessary to make my life nearly impossible. I'm 19. I am a women and a college student. I've been making my own money since I was 16 and I've been like the perfect daughter. I've never done anything wrong or gotten in trouble. They are treating me like this because they don't know how to let go. I am transferring to another school upstate in a year because I feel like its the only way to gain my independence. In the meantime, how can I approach this??
(link)
|
You're right. You are 19 years old, you are now an adult. You are ENTITLED, unquestionably, to your independence. Which means it's time to make decisions for yourself, that benefit you, and do what you see fit. Staying at home is limiting you. I don't know the full situation you're in, but your mother going to the extremities of treating you as if you were an infant is a definite hindrance.
You mention that you have some sort of income. I'd advise you to start looking into possibly renting a place or looking for a room mate.
As far as approaching the matter of you getting out into the world on your own, you really owe them no explanation. You are a grown woman and it's time for you to get out and experience life. They're going to have to accept it.
You can explain to them how you feel and how they're holding you back, if you'd like. But irregardless, it's time for you to move on with your life.
|
Im 13 and a girl
I like am always having discharges even when im not close to my period and there always really heavy and my period has never been light never, its always been heavy is this normal or do I have a problem? (link)
|
At your age, your menstrual cycle will be out of whack for a year or two as your body's still maturing. And even for adult women, our cycles can vary month to month. Some women bleed heavily, some women don't, some people have full 7 day cycles, and some only three.
Having discharge is perfectly normal - it's the vagina's way of cleaning itself. As long as it's not discolored or has an odor, there's likely no issue.
Moreover, all periods are different. If you feel as though you have a problem though, you should consult with a gynecologist.
|
|
People say it is bad, why is that? (link)
|
Usually the people that say that often feel like you could be spending time with them and somewhat feel neglected.
There's also the scenario of you becoming too dependent on someone else, which is never a good thing.
However, there's really no such thing as "spending too much time" with a friend, but you should split your time equally between all friends and family. And most of all, leave some time for yourself.
|
|
i'm just wondering how many of you believe in love at first sight? i honestly thought it was the stupidest thing ive ever heard of but then i saw one of my friends guy friends and my heart just like sunk and i had butterflies and all that stuff people talk about when they're in love. i've had alot of crushes but none of them gave me this feeling. what do you think it is? (link)
|
Love at first sight doesn't exist, simply because love is an overall connection to that person. It's a romantic thought, sure, but not a rational one. However, it's not to say that you couldn't love that person over time.
You'll feel a million different ways about many people as you get older. Each crush is different. There are even different types of love. And sometimes the people we thought we loved, we didn't at all.
What you're experiencing is lust. Love and lust often intertwine because there is a certain level of lust to be obtained through love. And for whatever reason, he's exceptionally attractive to you.
|
|
my boyfriend wont let me near his phone. he gets paranoid if i ask to see it and watches my every move. he sleeps with it in his pocket or under his pillow. should i be worried? (link)
|
I'm a firm believer that some things are private matters. Yes, even in relationships. Phone snooping is bad, unless you truly have suspicions.
But obviously you do, and his paranoia when you're asking to see his phone might very well be because he's hiding something.
You need to discuss this with him - if there's nothing to hide, then he can let you look at his phone. Truly. That means before he deletes anything.
|
16/f
when something bad happens, i dont just get over it, i really stay mad for atleast an hour or longer. i'll end up taking my anger out on someone not physically just verbally. or sometimes i'll just shut off my phone and not answer any calls or texts, even from my boyfriend, even if HE wasnt the one that pissed me off. i heard about serax and prozac. my mom deffinitly would not let me take those from the doctor she believes in holding your breath and i cant do it. my other optiion is xanax and im young obviously i know i can get this without a percription. helppppp? (link)
|
From what you've stated, you've never been psychologically evaluated. Therefore, those "options" you've just mentioned are not options until a doctor makes you a prescription for them.
Do not take any medication you haven't been given to by a doctor. Ever. It could result in many complications to your health, even death.
You need to sit down with your mother and discuss what you're feeling. Inform her that you'd like to see a doctor to make sure everything's okay with you.
None of us here can offer you a mental diagnosis.
|
17 F
Hey, Advicenators!
I need some help interpreting a dream because I think it is of great significance.
The dream begins with me in the backseat of a car with a 5-year-old kid driving. I was scared.
The next part of the dream seems of more significance. I dreamed that I was in my crush's living room (I've never been there before, though) and I am using his laptop. It is very similar to my own. There is no one else in the living room and I am sitting on the couch with a table in front of the couch and then a turned off television. I am using his laptop, logged on his account, and we are instant messaging. He tells me that he'll be here soon, etc. However, while we are IMing, more than twice, the laptop just logs me off for no reason!
At one point, two girls walk in wearing dark red dresses. They both sit to the right of me on the couch. One of the girls is pale (I don't recognize her) and she is REALLY mean to me! She calls me an asshole and is very rude. I was absolutely fuming, but I did not respond to her. The second girl is silent the whole time. She invited my crush to prom this past year and I was jealous, although he and I ended up spending the whole night together. She looked different though: thinner, different facial structure, but I could tell it was her.
Finally, he arrives, and we talk and cuddle, etc.
I've already looked up some of the symbols:
Laptop: need for communication
Couch: relaxation, also sexual connotations
Backseat: not in control of my life (disagree?)
Mean person: I'm too hard on myself
Red: lethargy; lack of energy (disagree)
But, (1) can someone please tell me the significance of the laptop continually logging me off in the middle of our conversation? It was very annoying, and I was afraid he would lose interest in me. A couple times, it was password-protected and I asked the pale girl what the password is accidentally, and she was REALLY mean and rude. Does it imply communication lapses and "boundaries" in our current close friendship? (2) Do the two girls represent his other potential love interests? The girl who went to prom with him will be graduating and at one point had a crush on him, but he definitely is not interested in her. The pale girl was wearing a really short dark red dress, but BOTH girls disappeared when he arrived, if this is of any significance.
Please note: I really like this guy and I want to pursue a relationship with him, which I think is very well possible.
Thank you! (link)
|
I'd say you're reading far into what you've dreamed.
Although the subconscious DOES play a large part in what you're dreaming, usually dreams like this display insecurity to some degree.
The girls are not "potential lovers". I'm not Miss Cleo, but it's far more likely they're representing your insecurities within yourself. Maybe even representing possible jealousy.
All the symbols in your dream are reflecting internal fears - not necessarily reality. If you feel that there are communication barriers, then most likely there are.
|
|
i used to blow dry & straighten my hair everyday, so the ends of my hair got to be pretty bad. but now i wear my hair curly everyday, and i use mousse and hair spray in it & then blow dry it some. i'm also trying to grow my hair out, so i havent gotten it cut in a while. what are some tips to make my hair healthier and grow faster? (link)
|
The majority of hair products on the market are terrible for your hair. No matter what the company tries to tell you, the majority of hair products strip your hair of its natural protective oils.
Most "cheap" shampoos for instance, the ones at the local grocery/beauty store, are silicon based.
If you want HEALTHY hair, back away from any heat-styling product (there's no "safe" way of frying your hair.) Don't use mousse or hair spray often, or at all preferably, and get your hair trimmed.
Yes, this means you'll need to lose an inch (or more) in order for your hair to grow properly. It won't actually "grow" if you never get it trimmed. What will happen though, is that you'll develop "split ends" that can split all the way up to the hair shaft. The longer you wait to get your hair trimmed, the chances of having to get inches of it chopped off increase. You're damaging your hair by not getting it cut.
I'd advise you to go to a local salon (normally they accept walk-ins) so you won't need an appointment, and ask them about their specialty shampoos. They carry the best when it comes to hair treatment and they'd be able to pin point the exact type of shampoo and conditioner you'd need for the quality of your hair. They can also offer you tips on how to take care of it.
|
|
I'm 13 and just started my period a couple of months ago. I decided to wear tampons because I'm in swim team and I had no other choice. I took my a couple of my mother's w/o her knowing (I never got the nerve to tell her I had started). The tampons she had were the big ones. But I had no choice. But a couple of weeks ago I got diarrhea and I was extremely dizzy. I had heard about TSS and was really freaked out. What do you guys think it is? (link)
|
Your menstrual cycle is apart of life. Every woman has or has had one at some point and you shouldn't feel ashamed to discuss this with your mother. Actually, it's very important that you do so and become educated with your body.
The "big" tampons are the worst to use (because they're extra-absorbent) they also put you at a higher risk for developing TSS. You should never use extra-absorbent unless you absolutely need to, and you should never keep a tampon in for more than a few hours.
As far as what your symptoms are, they're not TSS. Toxic Shock Syndrome usually starts with a fever, and within a few days you'd be hospitalized as it's often a very fatal disease.
But the bottom line is, you need to connect with your mother and I'd recommend seeing a gynecologist/doctor if any symptoms persist.
|
|
Okay so this guy and I graduated high school together and we never really talked in school until we graduated and fall of our freshmen year of college he contacted me over facebook and we just started talking,texting and sometimes talking over the phone.We eventually hung out like one time and we talked and just watched a movie and he didnt even try to kiss me or anything and he wanted me to call him when i get home just to make sure I got home okay which i thought was really sweet. Well that was the only time we hung out because during our winter break we both were sick and couldnt hang out but we still talked and texted each other until january then we stopped texting each other. It wasnt anything bad we just stopped talking for some reason I texted him at like midnight like 2 weeks after we stopped talking and he never answered me. I found out like 3 weeks after we stopped talking he asked his ex girlfriend (who is really good friends with my best friend so shes a friend of a friend but we hang out sometimes together because we have a mutual friend) and she told me this like to rub it in my face sort of but she said she didnt like him or anything but they went out to dinner together though nothing happened after that they just went out to dinner and that was it. Well turns out like 6 months sicne we lasted talked to one another I saw today I got a text from him at midnight last night saying hey how have you been I havent talked to you in a while. So im not really sure what to make of it. Should I text him later today is it too late to text him? Should I just ignore his text? Do you think he is playing me or just wants to talk be friends? I dont know what to do! If you could give me any advice I would love that. Thanks. (link)
|
I think you're over analyzing this and you need to stop.
You both hung out once and you had a good time, sure. But it wasn't a date, and although you two were talking he never made an attempt to actually date you. And that's the point.
He could've stopped texting you for a multitude of reasons, but most likely he stopped texting you because he's not interested.
I'd stop worrying over this guy, and move on. If you want to continue wondering when he'll text you back, that's up to you. But in the long run, it seems quite silly, doesn't it?
|
|
Me and my ex boyfriend broke up. I still loved him but i couldn't be with him because of my parents. I was going to wait until I moved out to be with him again. He moved on before I could tell him. Now, I cant move on and he insults me to try to get me to go away. He doesnt want me in his life anymore and I cant seem to accept that. How can I move on and stop loving him? (link)
|
Sadly, there's no way to really "get over" anyone. It's going to take time, but more so, it's what you do in that time that will ease the pain. And trying to maintain a relationship with this guy will only cause more damage.
He's not interested in you. As much as it hurts and displeases you, he's telling you to move on, and you need to take his advice. It's hard to swallow, but in the long run trying to "make things right again" is never going to happen. There's nothing left to be resolved, had or sought after. What's done is done. He is over you, now it's time to stop wasting your time and energy on him.
You CAN move on, and you will.
|
|
I've taken nude pictures on my webcam before, and little did I know computer stores see everythin you do on your computer, including see the pictures taht you see. Some guy has them and sent them to a lot of people i dont know, now he found my syke adress and is harassing me saying hes going to send them to my family and friends. Please how do I go about this to the police? Who do I contact? Im only 16, a minor in my state. PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!! (link)
|
You need to inform your parents of what's going on immediately.
As a minor, what he's doing is very much illegal. He's distributing child pornography which is a felony. This is beyond harassment, you're now dealing with an internet predator and this needs to be reported to the authorities ASAP.
|
recently, me and my friend been distant with each other. We kept on arguing and somewhat we had issues that was never solved, so yesterday i tried talking it out with her, we had an argument yesterday and things were just falling apart for both us, i had to say sorry how i was being self-centered and things i didn't want to admit how i was wrong about, also that i told her how she meant a lot to me. Everything went fine and we're back to being friends again, but if i did not say sorry about those things our friendship would have changed.
The thing about it is, that i feel powerless,vulnerable and weak because i admited and said sorry about how i was acting towards her, everything is fine now but im crying about it because somehow it hurts me when i should be happy that me and my friend fixed the problem. I feel like sh*t right now and i dont know why, i feel like i gave her the power and the satisfaction and i dont know why i feel this way, why i do feel this way? is it pride?
I feel like i shouldnt have sorry but i really needed to, i dont understand why i feel all this.
(link)
|
If you weren't the one who did anything wrong, then naturally, you'd probably feel bad for apologizing. What concerns me is that you're using "powerless" and "vulnerable" as adjectives to describe how you feel in your friendship with her. These are often emotions felt by someone who's being manipulated.
I don't know the situation you and your friend were in or are in. But I'd advise you to re-read what you've posted here, and take a step back and look at why you feel the way you do. No matter what happened, you should NEVER feel like you've given her "power over you". That is a huge red flag of concern.
|
ok so my little brother, is always downloading weird stuff on the family computer, hes always making our computer less secure, make it run slower, downloading really weird things, etc. i'm pretty sure the majority of things he downloads is to help him hack his little games he plays or cheat on the game. i get really mad because A. I have school stuff and pictures on here, and its annoying when we have to reboot the computer. B. I play this one game, and when the computer breaks, i lose everythng. C. the computer runs slowly, & thats no fun to deal with either.
We've already had to buy a new computer because of him. My parents don't really do anything about it, because they don't care, & plus he lies like crazy, and gets his way out of anything.
I want to be able to block this stuff, actually.. does anyone know if like whenever he goes to download something, a message type thing would pop up & he would have to enter a password? because that would be really helpful, so then i could check what he's downloading.
i've tried blocking the websites, but i don't know all the websites he goes on, and some of it is like websites other members of the family go on, and i think its bad, but its really not.
oh he has some of things on the desktop right now...rsbot, swift kit, MOD'S, riseq, rsclient.
if anyone knows if that stuff is bad, please tell me.
thank you for any help! (link)
|
Unfortunately, as long as he has access to your computer, he can download pretty much anything. You could block most of the sites, sure, but there are filters to get around that.
I do know that, "rsbot" is a common cheat in Runescape, it's a program called an "autobot" which earns you "money" in the game without actually "earning" it. It's a hacking program, and these programs are actually illegal. The likelihood of him getting into any legal trouble over it is slim, but depending on what other "cheats" he's downloading and for what, he could be putting you all at risk. Any script that illegally manipulates a website or a way a game functions is a felony, period. Not to mention, EVERY website you ever go to records your individual IP address.
These are definitely things to bring up with your parents. Because no matter how good of a liar he thinks he is, a simple google search of "rsbot" will tell you that what he is doing is fraudulent, even if it's childish.
|
|
I'm 22/F and for the most part, have my life in order and know what I'm doing and where I'm going (college, work, future). Recently, I got involved with a guy my age, and to be utterly honest, he's not like me. He's got some big flaws, is a little lost in life, unambitious, isn't financially stable, but he admits these weaknesses. I don't fall easily and I'm smart when it comes to guys, but he's a sweet, caring guy who makes me laugh until I cry and I'm having the best time of my life with him. The problem lies in what everyone else is thinking & saying, that I'm "slumming it this summer". My family and friends think I'm too good for him and that basically he's trash. I just thought I'd have a good time with a good guy and see where it goes, but now they've gotten into my head and I don't know what to think or feel. Will this guy bring me down eventually? Is it a losing battle? Am I too good for him? This never entered my mind before, but being surrounded by all this doubt/concern from the people closest to me is tearing at me. What's my next move? How do I navigate this situation? (link)
|
The problem lies in the fact that you're taking to heart what another persons opinion is. People are scrutinizing your relationship with somebody (who otherwise, you seem perfectly content with) and this needs to stop. Right now.
This is about your happiness, your life and your relationship with somebody you've stated isn't "like you", but has the qualities you obviously admire. You are happy with him and from what you've previously stated, you are both young and not everyone has their future mapped out for them. To call someone trash is incredibly belittling, and frankly if I were him, I'd be insulted. And if I were you, I'd put my foot down. Because unless this man is mistreating you, there's no reason for your friends/family to be passing these judgments.
I'm not saying to entirely dismiss their opinions, but there are boundaries to be crossed, and this is one of them.
The only battle you're losing is letting other people interfere with your relationship and second-guessing yourself. This is unhealthy and you need to break the cycle.
|
|