about

My name is Teza.. short for Tereza. I was born in Croatia and I speak more than one language. I'm 22 years old & I completed 2 college degrees in 3 years. My a bachelors is in Business Administration concentration in Human Resources and my Masters degree is also in HR.



I started this advice column about 9years ago and I was so young but it was something that I always loved to do. I am trying to get back to answering questions, at least a few per day. With that said, if you have questions about school, friends, make up, etc., feel free to ask.





Much love, Teza

advice


this is random but im just wondering. i dont know why but why am i so attracted to asian girls? mostly the philipino ones.. i dont know -- really, what is it about them? any fellas feel the same??


chad 18/m

A lot of guys are attracted to different type of girls. I actually have a few guy friends that like Asian girls because of their exotic looks and because they're beautiful.

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what should i do...
the guy i like is like 5 inches shorter than me should i go out with him or not???

Height shouldn't matter in a relationship. If you truly like this guy, go for it. You're missing out on all of the other things that are good about him and you might regret it later. Just do what you think is right and don't let his height stop you from dating him.

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14/f

lately, i've been thinking about cutting my hair short. Not TO short, like in between my chin and shoulders, in some spiky scene kid style. and then getting long extensions for school and stuff. Would this be a bad idea? it's just sometimes, I HATE having long hair, and I think it would be MUCH easier to just chop it off and have "removable hair" ha ha. Ok, I know basically zip about extensions. I know you clip them in but do they STAY clipped in all day? Will they feel secure, and not loose? Also, I need some really long ones, like to the bottom of your rib cage, mid-torso? But I need them to be human hair (so I can dye and straighten it) and really cheap :) I know i'm asking for a LOT but it would help me out a bunch! Thanks!!!

-also, I play volleyball, so would I be able to wear them during games and practice, or should I take them off? Thanks!

I had long hair and recently, I got it cut short. Kind of what you want to get. It's easier to control and take care of.

Human hair extensions aren't cheap and you're not gonna find them any cheaper than $80. I have human hair extensions and they're clip in and it's so easy to manage! I love them. When you buy them, directions come with them on how to put them on so they don't fall out. I have worn mine to school dances, dinners .. pretty much everything and they have never fallen off if you put them in correctly. I have done so many hairstyles with them and it's simple so if you get your hair cut short, you can always have long hair whenever you want.

When you're playing volleyball, I suggest taking them out because sometimes, they could start to itch and you wouldn't want them bothering you.

I recommend you buy them at Sally's Beauty Supply :)

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Around two days ago I lost my virginity. I have noticed inside my vagina burns & itches. My boyfriend (not a virgin) has been tested for STDS and everything was good there. I don't have any smell coming from down there so i'm not sure what it could be.

Those are some of the symptoms of a bladder infection. It's possible to get it after sex and it's normal. You should go to the doctor to be positive and make sure it's nothing serious.

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hi my cousin just told me that a chinese or japanese woman's vagina is shaped differently from other ethnic groups. i had never heard this before and would like to know if this is true.

All vagina's are the same, no matter what ethnic group it is.

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Okay, well, me and my boyfriend had sex, but he didn't have a condom, so he just pulled out. Is there still a high chance of me getting pregnat? Any answers would help, thanks.

The chances aren't high, but there could still be a possibility of being pregnant. To be sure 100%, take a pregnancy test.

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Ok my friend said to me that my boyfriend wants to kiss me, i am 13 years old and havent had a first kiss yet. i talked to my boyfriend in private and said it wasent true i really love him and dont want to let him go but i dont know who to believe because my boyfriend has lied to me before about a really little thing but this is big I DESPERETLEY NEED YOUR HELP PLEASE!!

A kiss is no big deal, and I don't think he's "lieng" to you about it .. but maybe he just doesn't want to admit it because he think you don't want to kiss him? Even if he does want to kiss you, just go for it if you're ready. Go with the flow and relax. He would even like if you made the first move and kissed him first.

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i just got my first kiss. and i REALLY REALLY REALLY want to make out with a guy. but all the guys i know and/or go out with are kinda prude and dont make out with girls.
so my questions are;
1. how do you make out with toung and without tounge
2. how do i get a guy to make out with me
3. how can i make sure im a good kisser.
lol thanks!

There isn't a right and wrong way to make out. When you do, just go with the flow and you'll catch on right away. If you like a guy, just make the first move if the guys are shy. Since they're prude, you wouldn't expect them to kiss you first so just go for it. In time, you'll be a good kisser. It's hard to say for youself if you're good or not but just try not to worry about it. I'm sure the guys will think you're doing a good job.

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we almost went out, but we didn't. now we have a class together and we started talking again. we both really like eachother, i've liked him for a LONGG TIMME...now he's ignoring me sometimes. its like a little game, we make eachother say hi first, but i'm getting so sick of it..nobody waits forever,right? why do boys ignore youuu??

Boys are stupid. I just went through so much drama with that kind of stuff, it's pathetic. If guys can play games, so can we and don't let him make you say hi first. Wtf, lol it's like you eather want me or not. It's like he wants you to do everything first and it shouldn't be that way.

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I read your column on controlling boyfriends does that apply to a fiance as well we are getting married in 2 months.i now its vague hope you can help.

Yeah, it does also apply to a fiancee. It's not right for him to do that and you shouldn't let him.

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I just turned 16 last month, i've never "gone out" with a boy OR had my real first kiss..how much of a loser am i?

You're not a loser, it just hasn't happened for you yet and that's fine. You'll find that boy, just don't be in a hurry for it.

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ive had my best friend since kindergarden and weve always been really close but now that were in high school its kinda change and i know that friend change but some of the things that have happened are kinda ridiculous!

1.one of her ex's was cheating on her and i told her and at first she believed me and then she started believeing him and the other girl and turned it into that i was jealous and was just tryin to break them up and she told everyone this and that i was such a bad friend and then when she finally found out that i was really telling her the truth they broke up but she still told everyone that it was all my fault.

2.like two years ago she dated this guy on adn off for about 3 months and last summer he said he liked me but i didnt know if it would make her mad so i just never said anything to him until SHE told me that i should date him and stuff and he turned out to be really cool and stuff and he was my first love. we dated for like 7 months and then we broke up and a week later she started dating him and got mad at me when i told her that it bothered me.

3. we were at a sports thing and infront of everyone she and my ex were making out and just all over each other infront of everyone and my new bf and i were just talking about stuff and her mom heard that people were all over each other she asked my friend about it and she told her mom that me and my bf were the ones doin it and that it was really embarrassing for her bc she would never do that infront of people.

4.we went bowling and she was talking to these random guys that she didnt know and stuff and wanted to stay later then we had planned and told her mom and when we got home late she told her mom it was my fault because i was talking to a bunch of guys

everytime we do something she always has to turn me into the bad guy and make it seem like im a slut and i do all this bad sutff and i dont like people thinking im like that and stuff bc im really not. i dont know what to say to her and how to make her realize that shes doing this bc it just really makes me uncomfortbale.

also my ex would always so these things to me and play certain songs and stuff and most of the time she was there and i always told her what he said and stuff and now everything that he used to tell me and the way he used to look at me and just certain things we did has now all converted over to things he does to her and says and she always tells me these things and stuff and when im with them(already really uncomfortable) he says these things to her and looks at me with that evil grin. i dont know what to do!

She is a horrible friend, & why do you even put up with that?! If my "best friend" treated me like that, we defenetly would not be friends anymore. You let her blame you for everything & you let her treat you like crap and that's not right. You need to tell her how she's acting and if she gets mad at you, so what! People like that don't deserve to be treated nicely and she's not a true friend to you. I think that your ex boyfriend is just trying to make you jelous by doing that with her but don't let it get to you. Good luck with everything!

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Why the heck is everyone labeling me? I am so tierd of it! They call me tomboy and goth!(dont worry I'm not anti goth). They think I'm goth because I love hevy metal, scary movies and books, and I do where black alot but its usally just one peice of clothing. And they call me a tomboy because I have really short (10 year old boy short) hair (its natrully black), I love basketball, ice hockey, soccer, tennis, golf, hanging with the boys, playing video games, stuff like that. I dont care about my aperance I just put on whatevers clean! How do I get them to stop calling me "gothboy"?

Throughout life, everyone will stereotype everyone. You can't make people stop calling you those things but the best thing to do is to ignore it. It might be hard when you constantly hear it, but if you don't belive the things that people say, let it go. It's not worth stressing about it because those people don't care.

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I will not make this a long, drawn out story, but will say that my ex and I dated on/off for 8 months. We broke up Feb 07, but we often run into each other around town. He has asked me to get back together several times, but I'm so afraid that the same things that will happen that led to us breaking up. He randomly texts or calls me just saying "I want you back". All last summer I dated a guy and I thought things were great. We broke up just before school started and now I find out that things weren't what they seemed at all. He was using me and talking to "his first love" the whole four months we were together. Deep down I knew that I was just going through the motions of dating this guy in the summer. I still had feelings for my 1st bf. When he heard I was single, he called me and we tried to go out again, but it didn't work. I stayed single until Jan 08 and now I go out with a guy who is okay, but I'm starting to have mixed feelings about him. He yells at me all of the time and anytime I get in trouble with my parents he tells me it is obviously because I am extremely stupid. It really hurts when he talks to me like this, but other times we get along. He tells me that he will never break up with me, if I don't want to go out with him it is up to me to break up with him. Well, my first bf has been texting and calling me again for about 2 weeks now. He tells me he will do anything to get me back. We have the same lunch block and he just sits there and stares and smiles at me. Even though I know we don't stand a chance of making things work, I still love him and I want him back. I know it is wrong to talk/text him behind my current bf's back. I even kissed him last week. I want to move on, but I keep getting pulled back by old thoughts and feelings. What should I do? I think I'm going to break up with my current bf because I know it's not fair to stay with him when I have feelings for someone else.

If a guy is going to call you stupid and yell at you all the time, it's not worth staying with him and you're obviously not that happy with him. Look at the things that made you and your first boyfriend break up. Take those bad things and see if you can fix them. What was the problem? & how you both can make it better this time. Talk to him and let him know that this is the last time you're willing to try and make the relationship work. If things don't work out for whatever reason, move on. Stop talking to him because that is the only was you'll ever get over him.

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well lately ive been crushing on this guy named joe. joes a skaterguy and is very popular. so i never really hung out with him a lot. so me and him really got close since like the past 2 wks. on monday, joe sat next to me in ela.. he kept talking to me.
on tuesday, he sat next to me again and he kept cracking me up and making me laugh and he passed notes with me and all this stuff. so his friends fred and mitch were sitting behind us and when i passed him a note and he read it he went to give it back to me and i got it but his friend mitch grabbed the note and read it with fred. so 2 minutes later i heard mitch and fred whispering and fred said \"joe told me over the weekend he does\" so then mitch comes up to me and says, \"arie, joe likes you and he wants to go out with you.\" so then joe jumps up and says\" i dont like arie.\" joe then started blushing. then i was like its fine. and then joe was like, \" dont listen to them i dont like you.\" so then that was it. also in the hallways that day, all his friends were like\" joe, you told her?\" and then one said , \" there she is joe\" and they were looking at me. also i just walked away to get away. and a minute later ( i was gone) my friend told me him and his friend marc were walking and marc was like \"wheres arie? joe has to tell her something.\" and joe was blushing and said \"i dont like her\".

extra info:
*after i heard joe whisper to his friends, yeah that joke was so funny arie said.
*my friend asked him monday ( day before this happened) do you like arie? and he said why are you jealous? ( he doesnt like me friend.)

do you think joe likes me? or not?

I think that Joe does like you. Guys act like that when they're not sure if the girl likes them back so they deny it. His friends are also embarrassing him and it's making it worse. His friends should stop but they're just trying to help him out. You should talk to Joe and ask him yourself, & if you do like him, tell him and he'll feel better and it'll be easier for him to tell you how he feels.

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ok ok ok, i am very wierded out right now. i just went round the girl i likes house, she likes me and i like her, her mum went out for about an hour and all she tried to do was get it on with me, now not that thatsa bad thing normally but shes got a boyfriend allready so 2 things run through my mind 1.) I SHOULDNT BE DOING THIS (which i tryed my best not to no matter how hard it was) and 2.) if shes like this with him why the hell wont she be like that with me if we were to go out???? i'm so exausted and nerve wrecked to think straight at this moment i dont have a clue what i'm doing anywere

Just because she hooks up with you while she has a boyfriend, doesn't necessarily mean that she will be like that towards you. You need to talk to her and let her know that if she likes you, she shouldn't be cheating on her boyfriend because it is wrong. I know it's hard to say no, but you gotta tell her like it is.

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There's this guy, I have hung out with a couple times. We get along great and everything. I want to get to know him better maybe get into a relationship with him. And he invited me to go to the beach with him. I'm going but that's not the point.
Is it a sign that he likes/trusts me, if he confides in me about how his life is kinda going, like the shit with his ex-gf and family problems. He really opens up to me. Does that maybe mean that there maybe some potential in a relationship?
Would you open up to a chick like that?

I'm not a guy, but I thought I'd answer. If he didn't trust you and didn't like you, weather it's in a friendship level or not, he wouldn't tell you those things about himself. I think that he defenetly could be attracted to you and he's asking you to hang out to get to know you better. Just keep talking and you will be able to tell if he's into you or not. There might be a potential relationship :)

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I just turned 14 but i smoke ciggerettes NOT all the time. but like i would not smoke in a while and say i quit and stuff. then i would goto a friends house and we all hangout and they always offer me a ciggerette i obviously take it. it's like i HAVE to. and i feel so goood. and free smoking i love it. but hate it at the same time. while i smoke i always think about how my lungs are gonna look if i keep it up. idk what to do. HELP ME!

You're taking those cigarette's because everyone around you smokes and if you don't take one, they might think something bad about you. I have a ton of friends that smoke & they offer it to me, but I can say no because I just don't like it. I don't know how it "feels good" because there isn't much plesure if you're not addicted to them yet. You don't HAVE to take one, no one is making you and you should be able to say no. Next time someone offers you a cigarette, just say no and see how that feels. I'm not trying to be harsh or anything, I just don't like when people who don't smoke.. do just for the hell of it and because their friends do and they want to fit in.

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heeyyy okaay well i had sex with my boyfriend and we didnt use a condom, i know he would never bust in me but i havent gottin my period in 28 dayss. is that normal? im kindaa freakin outt but i dont knoww! i need help thanks

If you're 28 days late, then there is a chance you could be pregnant. Go get a pregnancy test just to make sure. Don't wait until it's too late.

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Okay i have a problem. I am in eigth grade and i only had one boyfriend more than a year ago. he wanted to hook up but i wasnt ready, but now i am and we broke up and i want a boyfriend! and i want someone i trust to hook up with, and i just want someone to hold me and i have really bad taste in guys, they're always jerks, so what do i do!!!

If you're ready for that kind of stuff, great but you shouldn't just want any guy. The right guy will come along and just be patient with it. Start talking to some guys as friends and see how things go. Don't be in a rush, you have plenty of time! .. & girl I know what you mean about guys, most of them are jerks and it's hard to find the right one.

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