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January 23, 2007Answers:
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My name is Elly and I am 18 years old. I live in Michigan and I graduated High School in '07. I'm currently attending a great college, but I'm home for the summer. It's too nice outside to sit on the computer all day, so I might not be as active on here as I would like.I guess a good way to describe me is experienced. I've discovered a lot about life and I can't wait to discover more... while having fun at the same time of course! ...BUT, like everyone, I have experienced things in life that I rather wish I hadn't. And I also feel that those bad experiences qualify me to help others with this column.
I have been in a serious relationship for over two and a half years now. I personally know that love is a difficult thing to nurture. It takes a lot of work. Life is NOT a fairytale where two people can simply love each other and everything will just fall into place. It doesn't work like that in the real world.
People on Advicenators are starting to disappoint me. Everyone says "ooh I want to help! I've experienced EVERYTHING!" Yet, I can't tell you how many questions I see with answers like "you could have googled that" or "we're not going to do your homework" or "I'm so sick of 'wow does he like me?!' questions." I used to sort of be like that, but now I realize how hypocritical that is. If I know the answer to a question, I will answer to the best of my ability without making you feel stupid for asking it in the first place. Advicenators is going to turn into a pretty nasty place if people just keep brushing off questions like that.
Rate or don't rate. I really don't care. But don't give me a 1 just because I tell you something you don't want to hear. Go to your mom for advice if you want sugarcoated answers.
I can give excellent advice on:
relationships/sex
friendship
family issues
anything about animals (i worked at a vet for several years)
college
advice
My bestfriend is 14 and she smokes everyday, probably 5 or more a day, and she's been doing it for a LONG time, she use to drink, and every now and then she'll do it, but not alot, like she smokes..I know she's gonna have health problems in the future..but since she's been doing this for so long, and so many, do you think something could happen soon?
I want to tell someone, but I don't know..her grandparents let her smoke, and when she's with her mom, she has to sneak.
What do I do..I'm worried..
Is your friend aware that it is illegal for her to smoke? Is your friend aware that since she is so young, the smoking can affect her growth?
Your friend sounds really stupid. Honestly, there's nothing you can do except tell her that you are worried and remind her how bad smoking is for her. Since she's been smoking so long, it's going to be VERY hard for her to stop. If she's not going to take your concerns seriously, let her go do what she wants. She'll realize her mistake eventually... and most likely the hard way.
How do you know if your boyfriend is cheating on you? See, my boyfriend has this MyYearBook thing, and I don't think he knows that I know about it, but I don't know. He's friends with all these girls..and he told me on his myspace all his girl friends are from school. Well, on his myyearbook he has girls from other states and there in bra's & panties, and it's so gross. I'm so scared he's cheating, but I know he'd never do that to me. But I don't like that website...and that he's friends with those girls..like the half naked girls you know. So what do you think I should do? Confront him about it?
sorry this was long, I don't know who else to ask.
Trust me darling, I know EXACTLY how you feel. My boyfriend does stuff like that too, but here's the thing: he's with you, not them. I was in this mess not too long ago, actually I'm still trying to get over it to be honest. My boyfriend left a couple comments on a girl's picture telling her how beautiful she was. She was from another state and they had never met in person, but it seriously broke my heart. But I, like you, know that he would never purposely hurt me, just like you know your boyfriend would never purposely hurt you.
It ate me up inside for days, but then I realized something. Guys like our boyfriends are always going to look at pictures of other girls online, be friends with girls that might be prettier, and hurt our feelings in ways that they will never understand. But in the end, you have to trust your boyfriend and be thankful that it's YOU he goes home with every night; not those other girls.
I think it would be a great idea to talk with him about the MyYearBook. He probably didn't even realize he was doing anything wrong. Don't yell at him or anything, just calmly confront him about it. Say, "I'm sure it's no big deal, but I saw those pictures of those girls you're friends with. It made me a little jealous/hurt." Give him a chance to explain and I'm sure things will work out just fine.
okay so like 2 years ago i had to have a tooth pulled.. and it never came in. So today i went to the dentist and they decided that they were going to surgeclly pull it down... and now im scared. If anyone has had this done does it hurt?? like seriously i don't want this but at the same time i do cause i want my tooth obviously but like i don't want to be in pain for like a week either.
I have had this done and, trust me, it's no big thing. Throughout the surgery, you will be numb and they might put you on laughing gas, which really does make you laugh by the way. I'm sure you'll be comfortable during the surgery. Yes, it will be sore afterward, but they will most likely prescribe you a pain medication that can clear that up for you. The pain is the worst the day of the surgery, but you will most likely sleep the rest of that day anyway.
You really have nothing to worry about. Your dentist will make sure you have limited amounts of pain. You'll be glad once that tooth comes in.
Do you know how to put songs on your phone for ringtones?
do you hafe to go buy this cord at the cingular place to plug up to your comp and then cell
or what because i want to put ringtones on here!
or is there any other way?
Thanks so so much
I don't know the exact process, but you should be able to go on the internet through your cell phone and get ring tones that way. I would call your cell phone company if you'd like a specific walk-through of how to do it.
Long story short, I have a ex who dumped me for his ex and wanted me back and what not and it's been a long while since we broke up, although i still have some sort of feelings for him and everyone knows that.I avoid ever going back out with him. I wouldn't now or the near future.I'm with someone for 5 and half months. I haven't talked to my ex for months now and he showed up at my school (he graduated already) and he was at my lunch. I was really surprised to see him there considering I thought I wasn't going to see him.. in a long time.Since he's not in highschool anymore.I got a weird feeling in my stomach and I just couldn't believe how much he effects me. I thought that feeling was gone or most of it.It surprises me that he could still get something out of me.Anyways, he tapped me on my shoulder and walked off.I had a weird look on my face too. I really didn't know what to do.. could this possibly be a problem? Or should I just shrug it off because I'm with someone. Honestly, my ex wasn't worth my time and I wouldn't go back out with him.So any input or something?I'm just over whelmed..
I think the reason you still feel strange around him is because the relationship with him was so short and, obviously, because you still have some feelings for him. I suggest you just try not to think about him. After all, I'm sure you won't be seeing him around often anyways. Focus your energy on your schoolwork, your friends, your current boyfriend, etc. Keep moving forward in your life and keep yourself busy.
The down side of any relationship is that even after you break up, there is always going to be a little awkwardness when you bump into each other, whether things ended well or not. It's just a fact of life. Try to relax and don't think much of it. Your reaction wasn't anything out of the ordinary.
I don't have a problem with acne but I usually have 2 or 3 stubborn pimples, and I just need a really effective spot treatment. Any recommendations that I could purchase at a store (price doesn't matter) would be appreciated!
My favorite spot treatment involves an aspirin and a lemon. Crush an aspirin until in forms a fine powder and mix it with pure lemon juice until it forms a semi-thick paste. Apply the paste to each individual pimple and leave on for 20 minutes. Rinse with warm water afterward. Do that maybe two or three times a day and your skin should be clear within 1-2 days.
Does anyone work out at curves? Does it work for you? What kind of diet do you follow?
Curves is great! I worked out there for five months and I lost quite a bit of weight. The diet that you follow really depends on you. Some people that not change their diet, work out, and lose weight. Other people really need to change their diet AND work out to lose weight. I would ask the owner the curves you go to for suggestions on a diet to follow. They'll be glad to help you out.
You'd be surprised how a few simple changes in your diet can help you lose weight. At the start of summer, I didn't drink anything but water, crystal light, and ice tea and I didn't eat any french fries or fast food. Just by cutting out soda and and fries, I lost about 15 pounds by the end of summer. Maybe something like that could work for you?
Okay well me and my boyfriend have been going out for a month and everything is going really good.
but well we have been trying to kiss for the last week and well im ready for it and i told him i could kiss him but he said he wants to be the man...but evertime we are about to do it he backs off and we sit around joking about how we cant do it..
does it mean anything bad or....
I don't think it's anything bad, he's probably just really shy. Next time you're in that situation and he jokes about "being the man," smile at him and say something like "psht well I'm the woman," and just kiss him! It would be cute and I'm sure it will help break the ice. Go for it and I know the two of you will be glad you did!
i gained 20 lbs over the summer.
now i have like
where your bra is fat sticking out
it is so embarrassing
what are the best exercises to get rid of these love handles up there!
A good exercise for that is calling "the bicycle." It's really fun. You lay on your back and rest your hands behind your head, keeping your elbows pointed OUT. It's important that they are to the side and not in front. Then, you bend your knees up and light your upper body forward and you continuously touch an elbow to the opposite knee, switching between arms. Does that make sense? It's kind of hard to explain. Basically, you're bending each knee up to touch the opposite elbow so it's like your pedaling a bike. If that doesn't make sense, let me know and I'll try to explain it better.
does it feel better for a guy to cum in a girls mouth rather than a napkin or something? and how can sex feel so much better than getting a blowjob i dont understand.
Usually guys enjoy sex more because the vagina basically "hugs" the penis more. That's a lot of guys say they prefer girls to be "tight." Also, the penis can penetrate a vagina much deeper than a mouth. Does that make sense?
so this sucks.
homecoming is coming up in a couple of weeks and all my friends have dates with people they REALLY like.
so that's cool.
but now they are all over me to get a date.
and there are all these scary guys that like me.
scary like...just gross.
totally not people that I would want to even talk to.
and my friends decided they will tell all of the guys that like me that I don't have a date for the dance yet and i'm interested in them.
yeah.
bummer.
and they keep trying to ask them to go with me!
it's so annoying.
i mean, i'll find a date on my own, but it's so annoying that every single moment they won't shut up about how they are going to go tell them.
i've told them they're making me really agitated, but they won't stop!
i don't know how to make them stop.
and if it's not asking me to the dance, it's just to tell them I like them back when I totally don.t.
does this make any sense?
Tell your friends exactly what you told us: you don't want to go with those guys and you won't have any problem finding a date on your own. Remind them that it's none of their business. Your friends are acting extremely immature. If any of those guys asks you to the dance, kindly let them know that your friends were leading them on and politely turn them down. Plain and simple. In the end, you really need to sit your friends down and tell them to grow up or else.
I have one of those exercise balls. The big blue ones. What are some things I can do to make me legs look nicer? Like toned and not fat looking. (i think they look like that) Im 16/f
You could try holding the ball out at arms length and doing squats. Other than that, there isn't much a ball can do for your legs. Take up walking or jogging. Even running up and down the stairs would be good.
I am getting really pissed off. My stomach is poofing out right under the belly button part and i really do not like it. How do I get rid of that? Everyone says crunches won't work, so is there any links of any other types of exercises that arent too challenging? Thanks so much.
Lay (on your back) on the floor with your head resting underneath a semi-heavy chair. Grasp the legs of the chair firmly with your hands and, keeping your back pressed to the floor, lift your legs up without bending your knees. Lift them until your body is in an "L" position. Then, swing your legs back down to the floor, but don't let them touch the floor. Then lift them back up and repeat. It can be a bit challenging at first, so pace yourself and go slow if you need to. Make sure to breath and you'll get it down in no time.
Hi I'm 14 and I want to get a job to get some extra money, cause my mom never gives me any! so it sucks really bad, and i need new clothes and stuff, and you know!
Well I live in Arkansas so do you think I could do babysitting or something???
And If I did, can I just get myself in the paper, or post up papers everywhere?
if i do babysit, do the kids come to my house?
or do i go to there's!
THANKYOU=]
Babysitting is probably your best bet if you need a job right now. You could post ads in your local newspaper or put flyers in the mailboxes in your neighborhood (only the houses that HAVE kids).
If someone does call you, make sure you set up a time to go and meet the parents, their kids, and make sure the meeting is at THEIR house. That way you can get to know the family and decide if you would like to work for them. The family will probably prefer that you babysit at their home so the kids will have their toys and such to play with. It makes it easier on the parents when you go to their house.
K I asked the question down below about my bff having sex ok well
I know shes not gonna make him get a std test
shes only 14
she thinks she cant get pregnant
cause shes on birth control
and there gonna use a condom and all
but he's had sex
and like you said "pre-cum" can still get her pregnant
yeah thats what I'm worried out
idk.... I know shes gonna learn from her mistakes
but I want to help her before she does make this big mistake!
I Don't Know.
thanks alot for your help tho.
If she's on birth control AND he's using a condom, then there is a very low chance of her getting pregnant. If she doesn't want to make him get an STD test, then it's her own stupid fault and her own health she's risking.
Does your friend even know that it's ILLEGAL for her to be having sex? It is AGAINST THE LAW to have sex if you are under 16. She could get in big trouble. Try telling her that.
K lets say my bestfriend has sex, but she doesn't let him 'cum' or anything, but shes gonna let him do inside of her and pop her cherry, maybe, but if not, can she get a disease?
she's on birthcontrol, and he's not a virgin.
i'm so scared for her,
but i dont know
would she hafe to go get a mammogram and papsmear?
even if me didnt cum inside her but let him pop her cherry?
:(
First of all, I would like to say that this is your friend's decision to make. All you can do is offer your concerns, but in the end you have to let her make her own choices and let her learn from her mistakes.
The guy your friend has sex with should get tested for STDs BEFORE she sleeps with him. AND he NEEDS to use a condom, even if he doesn't cum. The problem with the "pull out" method is that it almost never works. There is this liquid called "pre-cum" that leaks out of a man's penis before he actually cums. The pre-cum DOES contain sperm, so your friend has a very high risk of getting pregnant. It's great that she is on birth control, but her partner still should use a condom.
If they already had sex, BOTH of them need to go get tested for STDs. You should let your friend know that if she plans on staying sexually active, it is extremely important for her to get a pap smear each and every year.
what happens if you download limewire?
is it illegal?
i heard its ok if you just put songs on your ipod, and not like sell them you know?
is that ok or not?
but if that was true, why would they sale iTunes cards and each song is 99cents
i dont understand.
i buy my music=]
but like is that ok if you just put the songs on your iPod or not?
ThaAnks!
Downloading limewire, the program itself, is not illegal. However, downloading music from limewire, even if you just put in on your Ipod, IS illegal. It's great that you buy your music. I wouldn't want you to get in trouble. Hope that clarified it for ya!
okayyy i've got a question, i don't know if it's weird or not but yahh i need to know!
well can you get "std's" from making out? or anything bad? like mono or something?
but is that only if he;s sick, has a cold sore, or if he's cheating?
is that the only way you can get something from making out!
if thats true, that freaks me out a bit.
=[
You can get cold sores from him if he has one, you can get mono from kissing, but I don't know the specific details. You can't catch anything deadly from making out though. Don't worry about it.
To avoid getting sick, take your vitamins to boost your immune system.
Do you think if I did this for a few weeks..or until I see a difference, (im trying to lose weight) but if I didn't eat fattening things, just snack on a piece of bread, or banana, and drink water, do you think i'd lose some weight? and is tea okay? with a little bit of sugar? or should i drink juice?
also, if i did 100 crunches, or more a night, do you think i'd see results by next weekend? or what if i did more than 100?
Thanks Sooo Much!
Stick to just 50 sit-ups a night and allow your body to get used to it.
Don't drink juice. It has natural sugars that can make you gain weight. Drink lots of water!
Yes you will lose weight if you do that. I don't really understand what else you'd like me to tell you.
Okay, weird question but ummm do you think it would be okay to makeout in a movie theater when nobodys in there? and what if no-one was in there, and we were making out on the floor, like I was on top of him,but thats not gonna happen, but if so, what would happen?
Well I suppose it would, but the floor is gross. Why would you want to lay on it?
As long as no one is in there and you're not grossing people out, I guess it's fine.