Sometimes my advice is good advice, and sometimes it's just an opinion. Sometimes people don't take good advice (ironically.) If everybody would just talk to each other, we'd have world peace, so you probably won't see "just talk to them" in my column.
I worked as a Registered Nurse for a few years so I know a little about health.
I think and read about spiritual things. I answer spiritual questions without trying to convert anyone to my own beliefs. I'm a non-denominational Christian, but I believe everyone has a path to follow, and God is patient, so I answer spiritual questions from where you are.
Gender: Female
Location: FL
Occupation: Old wise woman
Member Since: January 12, 2004
Answers: 327
Last Update: June 8, 2006
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These dreams go on when I close my eyes
Every second of the night I live another life. i swear im living another life but these dreams seem so completley REAL! i feel lik in supposed to be in a diffrent world or place could these dreams come true?? also i think or dream about stuff one day and it comes true the next day and i already saw it the night before this only happens once in a while though?? what is going on help!!!! (link)
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I would keep a detailed dream diary, writing down your dreams right after you wake up. Then a second journal writing down what exactly happened later that was predicted. You can see the frequency and type of dreams that predict the future, how closely, and you can see if your dreams are really consistent, like another life.
If it actually does show that you are having premonitions, or recurring dreams, you can either go to a psychologist, or a good psychic for advice.
I don't know how to find a good psychic, though. Like any other profession, you have to just search and talk to them until you find one you are comfortable with and respect.
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I have been an athiest for about four years, and I have begun to feel lacking in that area. I looked up many differnt religions, and took trusted belief tests to see what would best fit with what I really want and believe. The tests all pointed to Pagan. I have looked up on it, and it just seems to fit. I feel so happy, even just going through a normal day is better now that I have found it. However, I do not think my parents (catholic and athiest) will accept it. Anyone who has had a similar "coming out" (be it of religion or sexual orientation) care to help me form a plan, so they might see my view?
Blessed Be (link)
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Your parents are an atheist and a Catholic? That sounds like an interesting marriage.
I don't see why the atheist parent would care if you are a pagan. It just makes no sense to me that someone who doesn't believe in God/Goddess would feel strongly that other people not believe in God/Goddess either, unless they are finding that threatening. If the beliefs of others are threatening, then they may not really be an atheist.
I can understand why the Catholic parent would be upset. The amount of upset depends on how committed they are to the Catholic faith. Since they are married to an atheist, I would think there is not that strong of a committment to thier faith.
Also, the reaction will probably depend on how you practice your new beliefs. If you go to pagan gatherings, seek out pagan friends, investigate pagan history, etc., it would probably make more of a difference than if you just walk into the room and announce "I've decided to become a pagan." If you choose a group of people who routinely practice witch craft and magic, and camp in the woods doing ceremonies, yes, you will alarm your parents. If you just go to classes at new age stores, and no more than that, they will probably take it better.
Since it is new to you, I would do a lot more investigating, and keep it kind of low keyed around your parents until you are sure of what kind of pagan you want to be.
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I have been adopted twice. I know my original birth name and would like a copy of the original birth certificate. The Texas office of Vital Statistics says they will not let me have it even though they know it exist. Does anybody know how I can get a copy of it legally, without having to change my name back to it? (link)
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I think your best course of action is to consult a lawyer. Here is a website where you can ask for free legal advice:
http://www.lawguru.com/cgi/bbs/user/submit.cgi
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Which do you think is better?
1)
The Moon
The moon whispers nightly prayers
before the sun awakes to overflow the day with light
The moon is the stars storyteller and
sings a lullaby to bring all children to a slumber
It witnesses all night activity
as a sliver of silver in the sky
The moon brings restless animals
to their hunting hour and
see all lowering their sleepy eyelids.
2) The Moon whispers it nightly prayers
before the sun awakes to overflow the day with light
It is the stars storyteller and
and sings a lullaby to bring all children to a slumber
It witnssas all night activity as a sliver of silver in the sky
and sees all lowering their eyelids
(link)
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I like #1 better.
The last verse I would prefer to be separated into 2 verses - the first one about the hunting hour, then the next one about lowering sleepy eylids, but add another line, so it has 2 lines like the others.
This is only a personal opinion.
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I need help. My friends are well, my friends. And my b/f is my b/f. I get the feeling that my friends are up to something. I dont want them to get hurt! What should I do??
SAM (link)
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You really don't give enough information for a good answer. What makes you think they are up to something? How would they be hurt by it? A good answer would depend entirely on the situation.
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My dad recently quit his job. He didn't like the managment or something. It's been like 7 months or so and I'm worried that he won't be able to find one and we will run out of money soon. I'm also worried because my dad doesn't do anything all day while im at school. I used to come home everyday and find him sitting there wastching the TV. Thankfully he's starting to get out more and do things. Is there any way I can help him find the job he is looking for? (link)
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He is probably depressed if he isn't doing much during the day. Being unemployed is depressing, and maybe the job he had was stressful and made him depressed to start with. Since you said he's starting to do more, he is probably getting over it. I know you are worried, but I would be patient just a little longer.
I don't know how old you are, but no matter how much you want to help, there is probably not a lot you can do to help him get a job.
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My son is in 4th grade and was just suspended for being reported for what he said to a girl but denied it and he keep saying he didn't say to 4 teachers & then told me a story that I really thought was the truth because My son would never open his mouth to say that. I was going to see why he was the only one since I felt they made it up. I was asking him all the names on the way to his school then he said not to tell on his friends made me think why not so I told him if he said anything to her at all better say it now,before I look stupid in there and then he said yes he said it I couldn't believe this was my son that the next day still have not punished him. What should I do when I'm hurt & angry I can't even look at him because I want to just get the belt out and bet his ass.(sorry)but I know I would really hurt him so I need advice on teaching what he did was wrong and help teach him how to respect adults? (link)
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I would not beat him. He admitted it, and he will never admit another thing to you if you beat him. I think he is probably aware that he dissappointed you. I believe kids are self raising. It is better to have an open communication with them, so they will come to you when there are problems. If they do wrong, they will be punished in other ways than you beating them. I think it is more important for a parent to be someone they can come to without fear. I think it is also very important that he never think of himself as a "bad" kid beyond help. He just made a mistake.
I raised my daughters like that and they are both fine. They have admitted to me now that they were shocked when I didn't punish them like they thought they deserved. And they told me they don't know if they could raise thier own future kids like that. They did some pretty bad things, like skipping school, getting arrested for shop lifting, experimenting with drugs and alcohol, etc.
Recently someone told my daughter "Your parents certainly raised an ambitious hard working daughter" because she manages a store, owns a house, and goes to college at night, and is 26. She felt compelled to tell them the truth - "Actually, my mom believed I was self-raising, and my dad only wanted me to be happy." It is because of what she herself believes herself to be.
Specifically, you didn't say what happened to get him suspended. Probably peer pressure was involved, and then fear of punishment from you. Apparently he said something pretty bad to a girl. I would have a talk with him about what exactly prompted that kind of behavior, because I can't imagine he wants to be suspended and be considered a "bad" kid. Were the results worth it to him?
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i recently have been excommunicated out of a great church due to not following their rules i was happy there part of me wants it back but part of me wants to live the way i want to live how do i get it all to mesh together so i can be happy all the time i loved the church i really still do i miss it all what should i do if you need more details please let me know but i warn you it is long well if anyone can help let me know (link)
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I would look for another church. All the things you loved about your church can probably be found in another church.
I wonder if you are LDS. I have know a lot of excommunicated LDS and Mormons. It doesn't take much. If you are, you are not alone.
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how do i noe...wen i get my wet dream?
wut does it look like..?
wut does it feel like? (link)
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It just means that your body ejects sperm at night, probably from a stimulus in a dream. I think the average age boys start them is around 12 or 13 years old. They are normal. It shows on your sheets or clothes, sticky or a stiff spot, yellow-white. You may or may not remember the dream.
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I have a boyfriend that i love alot but he hits me.But he say he sorry and he won't do it again but he keeps doing it. He said if I leave him then he will kill me.I'm so scared that he's telling the truth .He's already put me in the hospital 2 times I don't know what to do.So I need help ASAP if anyone can help me please.My life is on the line!
Love Apple (link)
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Contact a women's shelter. You can sometimes find phone numbers in the front of the phone book for abuse or domestic violence. Or call a crisis hot-line. They can put you in touch with women's abuse centers. The police department can also give you contact numbers.
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For my chemistry coursework I was given the task 'Comparing the enthalpy of combustion of various alcohols'. It basically means that I had to burn ethanol,methanol,propanol and butanol in spirit burners and measure the tmperature change of the water in a calorimeter suspended above the burner.
I'm not sure how to go about writing up the analysis or what to write in the risk assessment.
Have you got any suggestions?
Thanks a bundle. (link)
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I think the best source of advice on this would be your teacher or instructor. It is hard to tell if he is looking for a paper, or a chart, or what. Usually teachers don't mind if you ask questions like this.
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i'm a 16 yr old wo has been bullied for 9 nine years. Mostly fopr the pure reason of my apperance. I live in a family of five in a one parent family. I arn't the kind of kid to ask for everything maybe coz i no we cart afford it. At school i have at least 90 kids bullying me about my appearance and teaseing me. We i started igh school i had a group of friends but now the popular person in the group lost a bit of weight and turned into a bitch saying i could never get that size because im a size 16. Sjhe is aware i am being bullied. Now i have no friends at school cart go to half my lessons coz its so bad. I arn't jelsous of them i just no why people say be proud to be different if ppl just bully u. Ive been to the doctors about depresstion and the school nurse. A man who deals with suidal people sat in on one of out conversations but i guess i wasnt that important. I cart look ppl in the eyes anymore i have so much pain in my heart and feel so unhappy for something i cart change. I no the bullying wont stop but i just want to no why i souldf be the one feeling lonely upset and made to feel different coz i have ginger hair and dont wear adidas. (link)
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It would help if you could make at least one friend to confide in. Have you considered church? Sometimes you can find friends there because they are not as critical (not always, but sometimes.) It may not be so much your appearance (although that may be easy to pick on) but your lack of self esteem. I am sure not everyone wears Adidas in your school. If you can find something you're are interested in or good at to help your self image, that would be a start.
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My husband and I are in a dissagreement about this one. I think that there are a lot of phonies out there passing themselves off as psychics, but that are actually a few that are for real. But I don't know which ones. My husband thinks all psychics are phonies, and nobody could possibly have these abilities. He is very cynical and closed-minded, in my opinion, but he thinks I am gulible. I was watching this talk show the other day with psychic Sylvia Browne, and she was picking people out of the audience and describing their dead relatives and friends, and even explaining things about them that she couldn't possibly know. I saw people nodding their heads, and looking amazed and relieved to finally know what happened to their loved ones. Are all these people paid actors? I belive it was the Montel Williams show. He seems pretty decent out of all the talk show hosts, and they seemed like just regular people. They gave her very little info to go on. If this is fake, how is it done? If anybody has had an experience with a psychic, please tell me about it. Thanks! (link)
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I believe there are real psychics. A lot of police men and detectives use them. I actually saw a police man in uniform leaving a psychic's shop once. There are also a lot of phonies. I am especially suspicious of psychics that have a lot of publicity (like on a talk show.)
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what does ballin mean? (link)
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Ballin means having sex. It was an old slang term, but I think it is not that common anymore.
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when i met my partner things were great, we had sex as new lovers do, then i got pregnant with our daughter, and after the birth i gained some weight, our sex life flopped and it was about once a month if i was lucky, anyway weve now split up and ive tried my vibrator for pleasure, can you tell me if the gushing of fluid i experienced is normal i thought it was wee but it was a different fluid from that, i know women orgasm but ive never known this, can anyone help, also i didnt have pain when this happened it was pleasurable
thanks (link)
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Women do produce fluid with sexual excitement and orgasm. It's normal.
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can u get pregnant without a boy's penis going into ur vagina.
(link)
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Yes, but it is rare.
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i know your all going to call me a liar but i'm not. well, my freind is 12 and has had sex 13 times with the same person. here's the story...when she was 10 she was dating a 14 year old guy, their parents met and got married, then they were dating other people since they had become step siblings, then they wanted to be together so they had sex, just rcently she got pregnant and had an abortion all from her step brother. then a few days a go she gave head to and 18 year old!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i think it's rediculous! but she loves him and when she turns 16 her parents are signing something so they can move into an apartment together! she calls him her "husband!" i think it's real slutty. what should i say when she brings it up around me? (link)
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She has problems. She started being sexually active way too early, and if her parents actually did say they would "sign something" they are partly to blaim. Between 12 and 16 is 4 years. If he is 18 now, he will be 22 then. It is very unlikely that they will be together then, because a lot of changes happen in 4 years when you are that age.
I don't know what you can say to her. She needs to develope some healthy interests, and self esteem, but I don't think you will be able to change her. You could invite her to do things with you that don't involve boys, men, or sex, but she may not be interested.
By the way, the 18 year old is in danger of arrest. She is a minor, he is not, and sex between them, including head, is illegal.
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Hi I'm kind of lonely. I don't have that many close friends. I'm 34, been married for 6 years, and I'm a decent person with good values. I have a beautiful 4-year old daughter. I would like to meet other women around my age with kids who live in the L.A. area. I would like my daughter to meet new friends, too. I you are interested, reply, and tell me more about yourself. You can email me at nicegirl90247@yahoo.com I have trouble talking to my husband sometimes, because I feel he doesn't always understand me, and makes fun of my beliefs sometimes. Can anyone relate to that? W/B please! :-) (link)
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When you say your husband makes fun of your beliefs are you refering to religious beliefs? If you have religious beliefs that have to do with a church, I would attend services and find a women's group. If you didn't mean religious beliefs, churches are still a good place to find other women with children to be friends with.
I would consider your other interests, find groups or clubs to join, and increase your contacts. Look in the neswpaper entertainment section for meetings, or look in the phone book for contacts to special interest groups, or even the internet.
Close friends are very hard to find. The only way I know to make close friends is to make a lot of acquaintances and hope that one of them eventually turns out to be a good friend later.
I can relate to not having many close friends, (but not the critical husband, since I am not married.) So I go to church, attend a writers group at the local library, take a tai chi class, and am still looking for places to meet other people.
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I have been with my boyfriend for almost 5 years, living together for 3 of them. In this time, he has never celebrated my birthday unless I specifically told him where to take me. He initially told me his family didn’t celebrate birthdays but I found that to be false. Every year he has a new excuse, even when I make it clear that I’d like him to celebrate my birthday in some way—even if it is just a card. This year was the worst. He started a fight with me and then told me he had planned to take me to dinner except the fight ruined it. But he never even made reservations anywhere. I just can’t understand why he insists on hurting my feelings like this or how to make him understand how important it is to me to be treated special for one day a year. We have his daughter from a previous relationship (who I have helped raise since she was 2) every weekend so we do not get to be romantic very often. It seems silly to me to break up over this, but I can’t take his thoughtlessness anymore. (link)
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He may have a problem with holidays and birthdays. Sometimes people from dysfunctional families (especially alcoholic families) develop an issue with holidays and special occassions and start to hate them. I am making a lot of guesses here, but have known of this happening. And the fact that he started a fight on your birthday is a big signal.
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Hi my name is"Shai" and I am 16 years old. I have this one problem...I'm never satisfied with the boyfriend I have! Whatever boy I may talk to, no matter how sweet he may be, always seems to fall short of being my type. And the currentboyfriend I have, used to like my bestfriend(I mean a BIG crush). My bestfriend didn't like him like that, but he had a huge crush on her. I liked him before I knew he liked my friend. Then, once we started talking, he began to like me like that...and here we are today. I have another problem. I think this guy is cute that likes my friend, but my friend doesn't like like him all too much in that way. I know I sound confused because I am. I don't know why I'm finding the guys that like my friends attractive. PLEASE HELP A.S.A.P.!!! (link)
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Is this a case of "I like a guy until he starts to like me, then I don't like him any more?" Maybe this is not so much about the fact that your girlfriends like the same guys you like. This has to do with your own self esteem. If a guy's value immediately goes down when he likes you, it sounds like you must not think very highly of yourself. I think you need to think about why that might be.
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