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Why do the tiniest things make me feel so bad?
Lets start out by saying that I'm a 16 year ild female, if that helps anything. I know this could just be hormones and such since I'm a teenager, but I can't be too sure. I don't remember when this all started, but i've noticed lately that I'm feeling extremely guilty for small and insignificant things. For example, today I tried to grab a paper in Science. The teacher stopped me and said the older kids go first. Seems simple, but it's 8 hours later and I'm still feeling guilty about this. This is just one example though. It happens almost everyday, and it's starting to make me question my every action to the point where I won't do anything in fear of messing up. Should I talk to someone about this, or should I try to fix it on my own? And advice would be appreciated!
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When you wrote that and the teachers response, it hit me, felt it. Although the teacher wasn't mean, when I was in school, Not only did I suffer social anxiety but I lacked any self confidence so being told that the older kids go first would have felt like a reprimand, like I did something wrong, it would feel embarrassing or mortifying to have made even the smallest of errors, even unknowingly or innocently.
I take care today when talking to people in case they are like I used to be. If I were the teacher and for what ever reason older students needed to choose first, I would have smiled and first complimented you saying, "My, its so good to so such an eagerness in you. However, I need to let the older students choose first, I hope you understand." If you got a softer response like that, would you still have felt bad? Think about it. Your emotions will tell you, the same as they react to stirring emotional movies, just picture the different scenerio in your mind. If it doesn't bother you much any more, then you may simply be a person who is a sensitive. You pick up on others feelings and energies and it can throw you off. If you still feel real bad like guilty for the incident, then it's more than being a sensitive, and it could be low self esteem which is another thing teens battle with besides depression. And you could benefit from some counseling there. I have an adult sister who is a sensitive, a touchy feely sort of person. So whenever there is bad news in the family, I take it in stride while she cries and wails and falls apart emotionally. That is just who she is. IT is not mental illness or depression.
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I'm not a doctor so I cannot make a diagnoses. That said it could be just hormones or it could be the start of "Teenage Depression (TP)." Doctors and psychiatrists have recently come to accept Teenage Depression as an illness. Back when your parents were your age TP was considered a phase all children go through upon entering puberty and would grow out of it.
The first thing you should do is make an appointment with your family doctor for a complete physical and screening for depression. You need the physical to rule out any organic reason for the way you feel. The screening for depressions are just questions the doctor will ask you. Be honest in your answers.
Should your doctor find you are suffering with depression find a Board Certified Psychiatrist. A Board Certified Psychiatrist is a medical Doctor who has done a fellowship in psychiatrist and past all the test to be certified by the college of psychiatrists. These are the best doctors to treat your depression.
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