|
my ex is going to tell my mom my secretes
17/f
My ex is 22. We broke up recently and it broke me completely. I moved cities a few years ago and when we broke up i came to stay with family in my old city to be with my best friend. My ex and i got in q very big fight and he started accusing my mother of things. I sent my mom the messages but now she wants to message his father. Im now scared because he knows all my secrets. Ive had sex with him and i had sex with others before i was in a relationship with him, he knows about me getting drunk and smoking. He knows i took the morning after pill he knows all of my secrets. He will tell my mom. What do i do?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I have to strongly disagree with adviceman49. If you feel victimized your sexual relationship and want to take you ex to court then by all means go ahead and accuse him of statutory rape, but do not use it as blackmail. That is a big moral line you should never cross.
There is little you can do at this point. You have your whole life to do whatever you want but for you first 2 decades you are under your moms rule. You may have to deal with the consequences. It sucks, I know, but it is only temporary.
]
The first thing you need to do is check the age of consent in your state. In most but not all states the age of consent is now 18. If he had sex with you prior to you reaching the age of consent he is guilty of STAUTORY RAPE AND THE DELINQUENCY OF A MINOR. These two charges will get him life in a 10 by 10 cell in some prison.
You should tell him that he is guilty of statutory rape for which their is no statute of limitation and if he say one word to your parents about anything that is secret between you and him you will press charges.
Fact is every boy who reaches puberty knows about statutory rape and how ten minutes of fun with a girl under age can get you life in prison. I'm sure your 22 year old boy ex boyfriend is aware of this.
If I was your father and he was to come to me with the things you mentioned the one thing that would upset me most is him and you having sex. I would call the police a charge him. By the way if he ever took you across a state line there is a federal crime called the Mann act. It assumes he took you across the state line for sex even if you didn't have sex and he can be charged federally as well with a violation of the Mann act.
Your ex should be well aware of these things. All you need to do is remind him that running his mouth to you mom will get him life in prison.
]
Well, all I can say is that if your ex for any reason decides to "tell your truths" to your mom, then he will be exposing himself as the one who got you pregnant and since you are 17 now which is a minor and any male older than a minor has sex with a minor, then he would go to jail. Funny thing is most teens have sex with other teens who won't fall under that law since they are minor aged boys with minor aged girls. I know some statee have laws regarding sex between minors as well.
Personally, if I had a daughter tell me that a friend of hers was accusing me of things, making up all sorts of stuff, I would suggest she no longer associate with some one like that and it would not bother me as an adult to worry about what some other young person thought of me. I would not feel the need to call a kids parents just because they targeted me verbally. If the parent were a friend of mine, I may say something but to contact another parent and say something when I don't know if they ever disciplined, or their kid is God in their eyes and they would accuse me of being the trouble maker, NO....it isn't worth contacting other parents and possibly getting slammed. But if this is what your Mom wants to do, then I am sure that the drama of this all will just bring more drama. You can not erase your past. If you could do it all over again, would you, the kinds of things your Mom would not approve of? If you would, then obviously you wouldn't do anything differently which means this is the way you do want to live your life which is likely different than Mom would approve of. Why be afraid of Mom then? Only reason I can see is if Mom had specific rules in place for you and you broke them. And the other reason for being afraid is that perhaps since you are not yet legally an adult, that you are still under Her care and Her rules. So if you went against what you knew Mom expected of you, then yes, you are in trouble. I won't tell you to lie, it is best to tell the truth. Your Mom doesn't know that he is 22, she assumes he is your age and so is thinking since he's a minor still, his parents would want to know. You may as well start planning how to come clean with Mom, cus once she hears from the parents that the son is an adult so she should be talking to him not his parents, then she will know something is not right. If you refuse to give her a contact for the parents, Mom might jump to the conclusion (a correct one) that you have something to hide. SO AS i see it, who knows how this could pan out. It might go better for you to confess now before things go south. Worries about what ifs, don't usually come to pass because its more a product of over thinking and negative thinking.
Sorry hon.
]
More Questions: |