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Post break up mental torture
I am 20 yo guy... And had been in a relationship with a girl for nearly 14 months. I really loved her a lot and it was a dream, Unfortunately shortlived. Things began souring within the 2nd month itself.Here is how it went
2nd month-She failed in her exams. I called & calmed her down.i happened to say i ll be there for u no matter wat the result. She lost it and did not talk to me fr 2 days.i somehow convinced her i was sorry & i did nt mean it
3rd month-she broke up because i said that if we were ever to break up i ll always keep her in my heart. She broke up saying i din say i ll always love her.again i begged n convinced her.
4th n 5th month had a break up again over something trivial
6th month she got soo angry insulted and humiliated me.i made her a card she asked me throw it. And that i did not deserve any1.i begged again
7th month. A huge fight coz i din ask how she was cz she had been ill.i sd i m sorry. Cheered her up. Then my agony began in the 10th month
She had her exams and so did i. She sd pls support and understand me. I did bt then during my exams i sd i might gt frustrated.plz bear with me. A huge fight broke coz " now that she was with me i was takin her for granted and behave rudely with her" then it was our month anniversary. I had my exams so i sd can we meet tommrw cz it was my bday as well. She got so angry even when we met she was behaving rudely in public to the point i was going to break down in tears. I prepared hand made gifts for her birthday and saved money. She broke up and asked me to never talk to her. And when i did not she sd i really did nt love her coz i din try to win her back. Ultimately we did meet on her bdae after lot of persuasion. Then i had gone out with my parents for some days. On the day i was returning she called up n sd she scored less in exam.i cheered her and said that i wud meet her a day later. She got angry ,accused me of never supporting her coz i did nt say i would meet her tommrw rather i sd
A day after tommrw. I told that i was really tired and would nt b able to spend time properly. Again a break up. I finally lost it when she flushed my ring down the drains and broke up. What followed was a series of tantrums,blackmail. I somehow lied that my parents forced me out of it coz they are against us. We broke up but now she says she wants to be with me. I really never want to see her again. But her friends sometyms call and make me feel guilty. My friends also support me but i desperately need help.i m worried if she harms herself i might get into trouble. Please help & sincere apology for making it long ! Please help
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This is a very unhealthy relationship. from the get go., she has been using your emotions to manipulate you into apologizing for a thing you never did. You deserve to be treated like a human being. and after so many break ups,. she is not fully committed to you. however. she is not happy that you are done with her, and so she is trying to manipulate you by saying she misses you. then get's angry when you won't drop everything your doing to see her. she should understand and just be excited to see you when she can.
I hope you move on from her and find yourself a nice person that treats you well.
Thank you,
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so from reading this, this sounds like a horrible relationship the whole way through. I don't understand why you stayed with her for as long as you did. You just wasted your own time. She did not appreciate you at all and you still managed to squeeze your way into her life. Don't worry if she hurts herself, most likely she is not going to hurt herself, but it is not your responsibility. She put herself in that situation and you're finally stepping up and standing up for yourself.
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WOW, honestly she sounds like a brat. It sounds like from what your saying here that this is a very one sided relationship where your doing all the wrong things and shes just holding shit over your head non-stop.
Look it takes two people to be in a relationship, and if shes going to make you chase her, say that your always saying the wrong thing (even when it sounds like your CLEARLY being nice and you ARE trying) she just never going to stop with this behavior.
She obviously expects you to be a mind readier (which no one is) and always know what to say which is impossible.
She sounds dysfunctional and like you'll never be able to make her happy and your only putting yourself through a bunch of agony for nothing. If she harms herself and blames you then shes even worse off mentally then she was showing and needs help. We're all responsible for our own actions, and as adults especially there is no one she can hide behind or finger point to get out of that. You need to step away from her and move on.
Its ok to worry but if shes saying shes going to harm herself then threaten to have the police come to her house. Its unfair for her to blame you for things shes put YOU through in order to make you feel bad. dont get yourself stuck in a bad situation. shes the one that keeps on breaking up with YOU so follow through on her actions and allow her to break up with you. Its her loss not yours.
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