|
Bisexual love problems.
Hai. So I'm Leah and I'm a 13 year old. I'm female by birth but am genderfluid. So I recently became friends with a girl who I sit next to in maths, she's really nice and funny and very pretty, and we have almost exactly the same interests. We've been friends for a few weeks and have gotten on really well. A couple of days ago I came out as bisexual and genderfluid, and it turns out that she is also bisexual and gender-questioning. She hasn't been in a relationship before, but I would out that she has a crush on/ is in love with her best friend. She has already told her best friend and her best friend was kind about it but didn't return her feelings, and she had accepted this. I really like this girl, and I want nothing more than to be in a relationship with her. I know it'll be best to wait a bit, and get to know her better and all that- but is there any possibility we could ever be together? And if so, any advice on how to make her like me more or drop hints about my feelings?
Thanks for answering, Leah. xxx
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Would you young people please slow down and take the time, to in a manner of speaking, smell the roses. What is the hurry to stick labels on yourself especially ones your peers will not understand and could possibly hurt you because of it.
You are 13 just entering your teens and in the early stages of puberty. It is absolutely normal for any teenager, boy or girl, to be sexually interested in someone of the same sex. It does not mean you are genderfluid or bisexual. What it means is you are exploring your sexuality just as your mom and dad and grandparent have done before you.
Bisexual and genderfluid are somewhat synonymous as a person switched between sex with both genders. At 13 years of age and having no sexual experience there is no way you can say for certain exactly what your sexuality is or will be. TO have feelings for someone of the same sex is natural and part of learning about your own sexuality. You may very well become a bisexual and there is nothing wrong with that. Just wait until you are older, 16, 17 or 18 and have actually experienced sex with both genders. Then you can identify your sexuality.
Today by declaring your sexuality you are doing yourself great harm. You friends in school are not enlightened enough to understand anything more about bisexuality other than they believe it is part of gay sex. Teenagers can be very hard on those they believe to be homosexuals and can even cause them physical harm.
My advice is to rescind the label. Continue to explore your sexuality and after you have actually experienced sex then make a determination on your sexuality. But slow down on when to have sex as well for right now you are far too young to do more than engage in heavy petting.
]
I would think that the rules of flirting and body language apply no matter what the sexual or gender at any given point in time. So really, all it takes is doing flirting and looking for her body language to see if she is interested in you. Most likely if she isn't fluid gender, any body language she gives off will be specifically female body language, not male or the types of main line responses that both male and females give off.
I will post a few links for teens on flirting.
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
And now some flirting by touch examples and hints.
I can tell you that back in school I remember a few girls flirt by touch with me and it felt ooky to me as I am not bi or gay and I naturally did not respond back. So if you try the flirt by touch and a girl pulls away, its a hint she may be confused, not ready yet to explore, or plain old not be open to sexual advances with another female or a particular female. So look for her being comfortable to your approach.
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
And I saved the best for last. Nick Notas is very good at giving info on how to flirt with girls. While he's giving the advice to men going after females, it should work the same coming from you. This is an article on his blog.
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Good luck dear.
]
More Questions: |