If your teenage or adult child is gay, did they ever show signs as kids?
Question Posted Tuesday September 8 2015, 5:20 pm
So, first off, I just want to say that I love my son and would still love him no matter what if he turned out to be gay. I ask this because he came out of my room the other day wearing my necklaces around his neck, and my purse over his shoulder. He was also wearing my flats. It just happened; I didn't encourage it, and I also didn't discourage it. I just let it happen until he took everything off. Does that mean anything, or am I just putting too much thought into it?
Dragonflymagic answered Tuesday September 8 2015, 10:51 pm: There are two areas to cover here, one of sexual identity or one of gender identity.
It isn't until children begin to go through puberty that they can have a clue of whether they are attracted to the opposite sex or the same sex or both as in bi sexual.
However, puberty isn't needed for gender identity. Therefore children of a young age 2 or 3 can already feel like the opposite sex of what their body's gender says they are. Lots of kids have learned to keep this a secret in todays world if they see any signs of others being harassed, hated and misunderstood or if they believe a parent wouldn't be accepting.
Teen boys do not usually wear girly stuff like womens jewelry and purses and clothes unless they are into cross dressing. In cross dressing, you'll likely find all sorts of males, those who feel like a female in gender, those feel like a female inside but at puberty realize they are attracted to both sexes, and even some normal hetero males who simply enjoy the feel of womans fabrics and enjoy dressing up but are in fact very manly males. I've heard of some who pursue a job of playing famous females on stage in drag as an acting job but that is the slimmest possibility.
But can your teen age son if gay have shown signs as a little kid that he is gay...the answer is no because he wasn't of a sexual age yet. That has to do with gender identity which is obvious to very very young children.
I think it would be a good idea to sit down and have a talk. Let him know what you saw and that you love him and are supportive no matter what his preferances and identity is. You just want to know so you can support him so he doesnt feel he has to hide it.
It may end up being nothing more than him flirting with the idea of dressing up as a female for a costume for Halloween next month and he was just trying some things on for an idea. However if so, he should be asking to borrow your stuff for such an event.
I did think that perhaps with your wording that I might have been misled and you are asking this addressed to parents of other gender kids, and meaning that you have a young child or school age child doing this. If so, I am not in that position but have wanted to understand such kids to be able to support and give them advice and have searched online for anything I can find on the subject. I will give you a link to a video on a child born boy whose mom recognized he wanted to dress like his sister and play with her toys and supported her child being raised as another girl. there are many such videos to be found on you tube. You can search for them. In case you discover your child feels the opposite gender, I have a link to a support site for parents of such children. [Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
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