|
sexual orientation?
I'm 11, and i seriously think i am bi. I remember being young, not knowing what gay or bi meant, and I would play family with friends, sometimes i wanted to be a mommy with another mommy, or i would like to be a mommy with a daddy, or i would see men and women and think i wouldn't mind dating either. I like seeing guys shirtless, and I also have watched the Anaconda video a few hundred times because it turned me on. Not sure if it is because Nicki is more developed, or I'm bi. But i know i am not straight. I knew forever i wasn't into just boys. I've tried to tell my mom, but i feel she would prefer if i was straight and would only like guys, because she is constantly trying to find more evidence to shut it down. I've also been a little possesive of a certain friends. She has been getting close to a guy, and I want her to sort of not date him. Tbh, i could go either way, but not any women with man genetials or men with fake girl parts, that is gross to me (no offense). So what should i do/think?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Good advice so far to be yourself, however, the reality is you also want to live in a peaceful home as you have 7 more years until you turn 18 and are considered an adult by law, whether mom is ready to switch off her mothering and raising you role, or not. Parents will always be your parents no matter how old you or they get and its hard for parents to begin to treat their children as adults and allow them the role to be their own person and make their own choices. Before that, while we are pre teens and teens, a parent really would do best to teach their children how to learn to make good decisions on their own by coming up with ideas and options and then using the parents as a sounding boards, like the advice givers here, to run your thoughts and ideas by. However a parent needs to be honestly open minds and give you only other angles and viewpoints you may not have thought of, repercussions if any, to your choices/plans, in order to train you to make the best life decisions, no matter what their actual preconceived wishes for you are. However, that all is extremely difficult for parents to do. I know, I am a mom of 3 daughters and though I did right alot of the time, I did on occasion fall into doing the wrong thing, and laying down the law instead of training them to do and make good right choices for themselves and learn to move on when theyve made mistakes. However they knew they could talk to me and tell me when I was falling back to acting the mom of a young child and I would amend my ways.
If you have honestly tried talking to Mom and find she is not openminded at all, you will have to keep your feelings to yourself. Your sex life or even your foray into discovering your sexuality is something that is a personal matter and not something a mother can change. But if shes unreasonable. It might be wise to do your best to hide it from me. Once you turn 18 and are now legally an adult, there will be no need to hide it any longer just to keep the peace. However at 18, a parent is also no longer legally bound to provide for that child, roof over the head, clothing, food by law too. Keep that in mind is needing to live with mom for a while until you can move out on own.
]
first of all you should not be ashamed of yourself.you are who you are whether that means that you like just boys or just girls or both.usually everybody when they start to figure out what their preference is,they try to hide it or just pretend that it does not exist when that is different from normal.but that is so wrong.i mean you are lucky enough that nowadays it is much more acceptable to be gay.bi etc.and of course your mum would prefer it if you were straight but you are not!so what?she will have to accept it someday and if she really loves you she will not mind in the end.i suggest you do what you think is the best for you whatever the consequences or reactions.be proud of yourself and just do you really.if you are happy with it and you embrace it everyone will too.-xoxo hope this helped
]
While I think it is possible that you maybe bi I think it is way too early in your sexual orientation to slap a label on yourself. You may or may not have even entered puberty yet and without the hormones of puberty it is really hard to say just what your sexual orientation will be.
Now if you were to tell me you think you were gay and justified it as you have tried with saying your bi I would believe you. For scientists and doctors now believe that people who are gay and lesbians are born that way and know this from very early stages of their lives. They also believe that being bi is something that is developmental or a chosen sexual life style developed during sexual orientation. Having no better answer I will agree with the experts.
Since you may not be or just starting puberty give yourself a chance to develop your own sexual identification. Just being attracted to someone does not delineate your sexual orientation. Because we are attracted to something or someone is not how we or anyone else should define us.
By placing a label on yourself at this age you are setting yourself up to be hurt as people your age and up through high school are not very accepting of gays, lesbians and bisexuals. There is nothing wrong with being any of these if that is truly what you are. As a society we are still not as enlightened and accepting as we pretend to be. So my advise is not to label and keep an open mind on your sexuality.
This is what your mother is trying to force you to do. You appear to be an intelligent young lady with a reasonable level of maturity beyond her age. I would rather present you with the facts and let you decide for yourself if you are in a rush to grow up and label yourself.
Your teenage years are still ahead of you and they are a wonderful time in your life. It is a time for growth and yes sexual experimentation not necessarily intercourse but other types of experimenting. While you parents may not tell you this most all teenagers will at some point experience some type of same sex experimentation. There is nothing wrong with this for the most part it is done because it is safe this and less embarrassing. what it does not mean. is you are gay, lesbian or bi.
My advice forget the label, enjoy being who you are and enjoy growing up and experimenting with your sexual orientation.
]
More Questions: |