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Want a feminized husband
My husband is an ex crossdresser and had relationships with men before we met. I have seen pictures of him as a female and he was actually very pretty and looked the part. He has never to my knowledge crossdressed since we have been together these past 3 years. I would like to get him to crossdress for me as I find it so arousing. I almost wish he was living as a girl full time now. I am not sure how to bring this subject up and am looking for ideas
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Just tell him that you want to see the way he used to dress when he would dress up as a female, and tell him that youve thought about it and it really gets you going.
have him dress up for just you in the house when your alone together and then encourage it.
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The key to any relationship be it work, friends or a marriage is communication. You don't say how you found out about your husband’s cross dressing. Your last sentence say he did not tell you so I would assume you found out through social media or a friend. We will come back to this in a moment.
When it comes to sex communications is important. The most important thing about sexual relations is that both parties must agree that No means no and stop means stop. As long as there is mutual consent to anything you want to try, sexually or anything else, then what happens in the privacy of your home or bedroom is not weird. Whether is something me and my partner would want to do is our concern not yours and you have no reason to share your sexual activities with anyone as they are your private activities if you want them to be.
No back to your question and communications which is your question. A simple way to approach it would depend on how you found out. You may want to have this conversation over dinner or in bed after making love. You know your husband best and should know when he would be most receptive to you asking about this.
You start by saying something to the affect that what you are about to say is not upsetting to you but quite the opposite as you find it sexually exciting. Then you go on to say I found out from or on that you use to cross dress. Reinforce this by saying I'm not upset that you once did this or that you could be bi-sexual. What would upset me is if you are suppressing this desire because we are married, this would be wrong. If you wish to or need to cross dress I am willing to even go shopping with you and help with this. We can even make love with you as a woman if you want."
If you would be willing to allow him bisexual activities or even willing to participate in them, say so; If not say that too. Anal sex with a dildo for him may be enough to satisfy him and allowing him anal sex with you may also satisfy him. Just make sure condoms are used for both activities.
Just be straight forward, use your own words. Make sure he understands you are not upset and are actually sexually excited by this discover. Going straight at any problem is most always the best and shortest route to a solution. It's when you start beating around the bush is when things get complicated. If someone told you about his cross dressing I will bet it is someone he had an affair with prior to your marriage. His or her reasons I'm sure were not honorable so there is no reason to keep their confidence so tell him who told you if asked.
I believe your openness to his fetish, which is what this may be, is going to make you a great wife. If there were more wives like you there would be less divorces’ in this world
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If you haven't really talked about any sexual subjects including your past and the present, it's time to do so. He's your husband, not just some guy you are dating, so whatever your fantasy or whatever you'd like to try sexually, it's something private between you and there is nothing wrong or shameful about it.
I can only make guesses since i do not know if you are male or female. I will venture to guess female since you said Husband instead of life partner although I know gay couples do marry. If female, and he is devoted to you but had men before, it may be he is bi-sexual. Also,If you have not asked him about those days of cross dressing and whether he misses it, how are you to know if he does and is holding back because he doesnt want to offend you? You won't know until he does. If it's something he doesn't enjoy doing anymore on a regular basis, as your husband you may be able to coax him into doing it just for you at home, not for going out in public with. He needs to know you find it arousing. What man is going to say No to something his lady finds arousing if it includes him? None that I know of.
I think it would be easy to bring up. I don't know how often you make love, but a good time would be in the after glow time, not during sex but after when you hold each other and talk. Tell him how much you love and enjoy him and then say, you know, I was thinking, I'd like to try some new things out in our sex life. Maybe talk to each other and reveal with we each think is arousing or would be arousing. What do you think? Do you want to share first or shall I?
Good Luck.
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