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How can I stay away?
About 2-3 years ago, I joined a website. I made many mistakes there and didn't want to be reminded of them, so I quit about a year ago.
2 months ago, I came back. I don't even know why. But I regret it. I always find myself going on there when I'm bored, but I just want to leave that site for good. How can I tell myself no? I have self control, I just have nothing to do and find myself going on there.
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The Internet is the devils work
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The website clearly satisfies some urge or desire in you and is merely the vehicle for you to fulfil this desire. So you need to identify the desire and address that, rather than mentally 'ban' yourself from visting the site. Which will be almost impossible to maintain. An example might be ebay. It makes for easy shopping, and the delight of unwrapping all those parcels as they arrive. Using it as and when required, it's a great and useful resource. Fuel a compulsive shopping behavioural pattern with it and it's a disaster. But the 'victim' must ultimately resolve why it is they compulsively shop for items they do not really need (or even want in some cases). Until they do they will visit time and time again, despite vowing to stop. Website designers also incorporate many subtle (and not so subtle) and effective 'hooks' to keep users coming back, which is in their interest. (Use of emotive terms 'friend' and 'like' rather than simply contacts increases the subliminal power of Facebook for instance. We all want to be liked and have friends. We all seek approval. We can even count our friends! It plays to a basic human need). So what is it about this site that fulfils a need in you? Is this need one you wish to indulge, or one you would like to limit or subdue? Beware of simply substituting this site for another which is basically the same but with a different name (which is merely a prosess called cross-addiction and obviously does not help the underlying cause one bit). And claiming 'I only do it when/because I'm bored' is a bit of a trick we play on ourselves to sort of justify the act (I might find myself saying I smoke cigarettes when/because I am bored...in reality I do no such thing. I do it because I'm addicted to nicotine, just like every other smoker!!). There are a million and one things YOU could and can do instead of logging on to this site. But you won't. And you won't distract yourself out of visiting either. You do it because it is satisfying some desire in you. And it is the desire you need to identify and address. Best wishes. X
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You can't just break a habit by willing yourself to stop. You need to find a new behavior to replace your old behavior with that will satisfy the same needs. Think of something to do instead. Every time that you have the urge to go on the website, do this other thing instead. If you're going on the site because you're bored, make sure your new behavior relieves your boredom in the same way.
If there are other aspects of the site that keep you coming back, make sure that your new behavior meets those needs as well. Find a new website to look at. Find a new way to interact with people or find out what they're up to. It isn't about whether or not you have self-control, it's about filling the space with something healthier. If you don't, you'll end up back on it again.
Additionally, you must delete your account entirely. This will make it much harder for you to go back. Some websites make this difficult. Facebook, for example, allows you to deactivate your account, but it's super easy to reactivate it again. It sounds like you could be talking about Facebook, so here are the instructions on how to permanently delete your Facebook account: [Link](Mouse over link to see full location). It would be a real pain to have to make a whole new account, which will give you more time to think about what you're doing and decide to go with the new behavior instead.
It's crucial that you pick a new behavior for yourself that is specific, just as easy, and that you'll enjoy.
Good luck!!
I almost forgot! If you can't delete the account or can't bring yourself to delete the account, change the password to something meaningful. Something like "notagoodidea" or "doyoureallywanttodothis" should keep you off. I did this once and it worked well. :)
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