|
humorist-workshop
I want to dye my hair
I'm a 14 year old girl and I've been wanting to dye my hair blue. Not all of it, just the ends. The problem is my mother was raised to believe that dying your hair was taboo for some reason and my father would never ever ever let me dye my hair such a ridiculous color and I get the feeling it's because he would get a bad reputation in our town if his child has blue hair. I really want this though. I just moved to a new place and in trying to "reinvent" myself, and I've always wanted to do this so I figured it would be a good place to start. So how can I convince them?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
I had a daughter your age who wanted the tips of her hair dyed green and i was supportive of it for one reason...this way of expressing or re-inventing herself as you called it, was not a permanent thing like a tattoo. Supposedly tats can be removed these days but its a longer more painful process and way more expensive one than the first i've heard. So for most it doesnt happen, a coverup is more likely and one still has a tattoo.
This phase of having her tips of hair a lime green, hair was brunette did not last long. After a year, she tired of it and wanted the green tips cut off. It is much less drastic than having to re dye and change a whole head of hair back to normal color and more stressful on the hair.
I suppose you could always remind them that this isnot a permanent change like a tattoo and its only the tips which can be cut off when you tire of it and still have plenty of hair left. If they dont go for it, there's nothing you can do. If they are more worried about appearance sake/reputation, there is nothing you can do to change their view as they are your parents and doing their best to raise you the way they feel Is best. Other reasons parents dont go for changes like this is for religious reasons or like your mom just being raised to believe it was wrong, no matter that there isn't a plausible explanation as to why. Even parents can believe things but not have any explainable reason to explain away their reasoning. Many people go blindly through life believing in something just because they've been told it is so, without actually investigating and looking into something and using their mind and common sense. Parents are also learning to change and grow in certain areas and this may be a stretch they are just not ready for or may never be ready for. It may be long to wait but at worst case scenerio, you can do what you want when you turn 18 since you will then be considered an adult able to make your own choices and decisions. Good luck dear.
]
As I see it; the problem you are in is a no win situation. It is you against mom and dad for two different reasons. Mom will not under any circumstances allow you to die your hair and dad if he were willing would not allow "such a ridiculous" color. That is the essence of a no win situation for you are a teenager subject to your parents authority.
Now let me say this; I'm old enough to be your grandfather and while I too don't like the idea or the color I understand why you want to do this. I see nothing wrong in wanting to change your hair color if you were wanting to change your entire hair color. To me that is part of being a teenage girl part of learning about how to be a women.
As I said I understand about changing the color of some of your hair it is something some teenagers do today. I can also understand why dad may be against this and it is really not about his reputation and more about your reputation.
There is nothing wrong with reinventing just try not to be shocking when doing so. Which is as I see it the problem you face. Is it possible you could reinvent yourself with a less shocking color one that might be more acceptable as a fashion statement yet still satisfy your need for reinvention?
I ask this for there are numerous times when raising a child that parents will disagree on something. In most cases they will come to an understanding which also in most cases allows the child to do whatever it is they have asked. The parents may put some restrictions on the child or modify to different decrees but on the whole the child benefits and gains most of what they have asked for.
I believe if you can come up with a color to dye your hair that is more acceptable to your dad and still satisfies you need for reinvention? Then dad may convince mom to let you dye your hair or just flat override her objection. In raising our children I have done that on occasion as has my wife. In this instance you are first going to have to get dad on your side and I believe a less shocking color will do that.
Once you have changed the color then you can discuss more shocking colors. A good reason would be say for Halloween; a nice bright orange. They are now use to you hair style and might not object to a brighter color for this reason. Once you change the color again they may not be in a hurry to have you change it again.
]
More Questions: |