|
Fear: Somtimes I feel afraid of him
I have a relationship with a guy that seems to be ok.But for no reason there are sometimes that i feel afraid of him.He hasn't done anything but he looks kind of rum.I don't know if I believe that he would never harm me.What should I do?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Follow your gut instinct! When you get a feeling that something isn't right,it usually isn't. Every time I have ever ignored this feeling I came to regret it!Just be careful how you end things with him. If your feeling is right you could be placing yourself in danger. Tell him it is over in a restaurant or other public place where he would most likely not go bonkers and try to hurt you. You might also want to be careful for a while afterward just to make sure.I don't want to scare you but there are many women now in their graves who uttered the words "I don't believe he would ever harm me." Don't take any chances or let your guard down just in case!Good luck!
]
My advice would be to end the relationship.
People do not follow their instincts as they should.
If you feel afraid it is for a reason. You may not know the reason, but trust your instincts. They rarely steer you wrong.
]
You didnt share much so it's hard to give you any real helpful advice. Dont know how long you've been in the relationship but feeling comfortable and trusting someone is not an instant benefit that appears the moment you start to date. It is something that happens over time, through experiences whereby you know what he is like 24/7 in all circumstances, how does he handle stress, crisis, unexpected things, What irritates him, is he easy to anger, or is he laid back and easy going and patient? What's he act like when sick, sad, upset, etc...and how does he treat you during all those situations. If you have a guy who treats you well and doesnt use you as his outlet for stress by dumping on you, then he's doing pretty good. Not many people can do that, and even less teens are able to.
I do not know what you mean by looking rum. But I have lived long enough to have on many occasions discovered I could not assume something was up or that a person didn't like me by the look on their face if that happens to be one of their normal relaxed facial looks. When I am relaxed, I tend to look very intense, almost like I am frowning but inside,however I am cheerful, just really focused mentally on what I am doing, like when I am concentrating on my answers for advice.
Hubby has asked on many an occasion if I was okay. LOL
One of the best ways to know what is up is to do just as my husband does and ask in a friendly tone. "You have a strange look on your face, is everything okay?" and if not okay, then "Oh sorry to hear. Is it something you like to talk about to get off your chest?" You dont have to provide solutions, just be a listening ear.
Try having more in depth talks, not the surface level sharing of gossip about others, facts about favorite music, bands, movies, occurances at school, the weather, etc.... all those things do nothing to let you know more about each other like hobbies, goals, beliefs, wishes, dreams, what most embarrassing moments were, how you handled it, what you wnat to improve about yourself...that sort of stuff.
If the first thing you think of going into a relationship is fearing the worst, personal harm, every time you start dating, then there may be another issue going in within you. Hopefully you didn't come from a dysfunctioal and abusive home as that could influence how you are feeling.
If I am totally off the mark and you have more information that could help us all better, then please rewrite your question or write to me giving additional info.
]
More Questions: |