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He's perfect for me, but does he like me back?
Hi everyone,I'm 16/f.
There's a boy in my history class who I really like. He is just perfect for me. He's taller than me(I'm 5'9), has a loving family, is athletic, has a life outside of his sport, he's gentle, a good son, a good brother, soft spoken, has a really deep voice, has a lot of patience, very mature, I can go on and on.
My point is, he's a gentleman. VERY rare at our age. And I like him. I've always looked for boys like him to get to know. I didn't even notice he was in my class until he stood up to present a project one day. And then on a class field trip a while later, we had a gorgeous conversation on the bus, followed by an in sync nap. Also he accepted this girls flirting all day, and she walked with him when I was trying to talk to him. But either way all negativity aside, since that day, I just couldn't get enough. Months later, there were days when my history teacher was absent, and I somehow spent both periods talking to him. Then I started talking to him on Facebook, a few weeks later. Eventually(after 2months)he answered more frequently (from a MONTH later to a few hours layers to a few minutes later) & about a month ago, he asked for my number since it was easier for him to answer me there than on Facebook. (I was crying I was so happy) and for the whole spring break, we were talking all day every day, him texting me first, & throughout that time texting, he was flirting a lot, but it could have been taken as something else most of the time.
For example, he would give me really cute nicknames as he said good morning & good night, he would ask me questions like "describe your perfect relationship" (says aww to my description, then says everything I missed), he basically described me when I asked him what type of girls he likes & he comforted me one day when I was mad, saying "I'm always here" afterwords. He was just so sweet the whole time. He never suggested anything that had to do with sex, unless I asked him about it ( I asked what his favorite body parts were and what type of legs he liked and again, he described my legs) & he wouldn't object to changing the subject back to normal afterwords, unlike other boys I've talked to. I told him once that I haven't found a mutual liking with someone & he mentioned that maybe he already had, then he said "maybe one day we'll find it" (what does that mean?) & it had my head spinning every time he said something like that. He would call me "awesome" and said that he would miss me if I moved, use witty little lines on me, never tried too hard but still he was very subtle.
We agreed that he would tell me a story about the girl that he used to go out with & he insisted on telling me this as soon as possible for some reason. When I was going to go meet him so he could tell me, the same girl from the trip was keeping me from going over there, (I didn't want to ditch her and be rude) & he was asking me "are you coming outside or not" (it sounded like he was eager, but then he goes and does this...) Then I explained to him that I've been there, but I didn't want to be rude. I found a way to position myself and the girl where he could see us, front and center. This girl is also in our class, and he knows her for a while longer than he knows me so when he comes up to us, he starts flirting with her immediately. She flirts back (of course -.-, she's one of those.) She has a boyfriend. I'm not sure if he is aware. So this makes me extremely uncomfortable, considering. We were looking at each other this whole time, so I tried to show him with my face that this might be a bad time, but my face didn't say that, it looked at him as if I was sad and confused that he was paying attention to her & not me (exactly how I was feeling, but not what I meant to do at all) so he stopped & came to me and properly greeted me. I smiled & the girl got the idea & started walking farther in front of us, and soon we were alone and she was getting her face sucked. He tells me the story as normal, we flirt and giggle and I admire him as he talks. I notice he's a bit nervous... But he never gets to finish, so we plan another day later, & he asks me if he could call me to tell me, but I say no because I want an excuse to stare at him. So when this day comes, I watch him play, (this is outside by the way) and I'm waiting for the bell to ring so he could talk to me. It when the bell rings he's still playing. I get up, a little sad since this time he wasn't texting me, he was absorbed in the game. So as I leave, I feel a hand on my shoulder, it's him of course. I give a huge smile (can't help myself) and he continues where he left off. I can't help but notice he's a little antsy and nervous as he talks this time too. He tells me about this teddy bear that he gave that ex, and he says he has it now because her parents didn't like him so she had to give it back (don't understand why) So he's talking, and a bunch of people notice us in the halls walking together, and a handful of my stupid friends make things very awkward. Pointing and giggling at us, saying "ohhhhhhhhhhhh that's him" quietly but obviously, staring at him, & one friend even went as far as to say "hey, I know you like her because she's beautiful and everything, but you'll never get that" and I wouldn't dare to look at him so I couldn't tell you his reaction, all I know is he kept talking, while I struggled to listen and respond.(I swear, I want to listen to what he's saying with my FULL attention, but he's just so gorgeous sometimes I can't believe he's talking to me.) anyway, when we said goodbye, I think I caught a glimpse of him leaning closer to hug me, but I quickly turned away. I'm not ready for all of those eyes looking at us yet. Then again I'm not sure he did.
After that, we have been talking during and after lunch, and although I don't sit with him, I see a lot of him. We talk in the line, outside, and walk each other to class. We still text every day, there have only been about 2 days in total that we haven't been in contact with each other. But the thing is he answers and then stops, and goes back and forth a lot, he's always doing something, so I don't mind too much anymore
Another thing: he and I both call each other little names. He started it by giving me a nickname, and it was different every day, there are many nicks for my name, but not for his. So one day I just started calling him things like sugar plum, sweetie things like that, and he called me hun one time, my lady another time, and missy. But those aren't affectionate names, just hun. (I was jumping up and down at that by the way)
I told him that I got him something one day (a paper of his I magically ended up with) and I gave him three guesses. He guessed a poem, a baseball, and something else I can't remember. So I told him okay then I'll write you poem, because it sounded like he wanted me to write him one (this was when I knew that he knew I liked him) and I gave it to him the next day. He told me he was going to write one, and I'm supposed to get it tomorrow at lunch lol
Yesterday, I called him on accident with the worst timing. Me and my friends were talking about him, about how people that have light skin usually tend to like people with darker skin and vice versa. He picked up, and he heard everything. So I called him back, and he told me what he heard, and we would have kept talking, but he thought I hung up because he couldn't hear me, so he hung up. We just texted (a lot of flirting) after that.
So my question is that I don't know if this kid likes me back! He's so confusing, he flirts in my face with that girl (which is really nothing by the way, it's just a little confusing that's all) and then texts me when we get home and treats me like a princess.
*By the way, if it sounds like I'm jealous of that one girl, I'm really not. I used to be, but I stopped being dumb. I just wanted to illustrate my frustration with her cockblocking.*
I want to thank anyone who got this far in advance. If you think I don't want to read extremely long answers, you're terribly wrong :) you reap what you sow right? ^_^
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You've asked this question before on here.
I'm still going with that he's interested in you, and most likely likes you as more than a friend.
Maybe he's attracted to the other girl too. Who knows, but I'm almost sure of it that he likes you.
So you should totally go for this. He seems like a great guy.
You can tell him how you feel..or just wait around for him but who knows if he'll ever have the guts to say it. So I think you should take a chance and ask him if he has feelings for you or tell him that you're starting to like him as more than a friend and see what he says.
I hope it all works out!
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I normally do not give very long answers because many people just want to hear the bottom line. But, since you put so much effort into writing your question I will give you both a short answer and a long answer.
Short answer: It sounds like he is interested in you.
Long answer: At sixteen years old, relationships are very exciting. You are just at the age where you have grown up enough to truly connect with someone else. You are around the age where real love becomes possible and that is exciting. Congratulations on finding somebody who you feel strongly attracted to, and who you are ready to consider a serious relationship with.
That being said, I would like to caution you about something: you should not be so overwhelmed by him. You seem a little too excited. At sixteen, this makes sense and is part of the fun to some degree. You really like him and he likes you back. But, when you get a little older you will notice that the majority of single guys will be interested in you. Guys are not picky. They just want a reasonably attractive, nice girl to notice them. Judging by your post, you are both of those things. The guy that is not interested in you will be the exception, not the rule. Instead of hoping and praying that your crush is interested, recognize that he is probably hoping and praying that you are interested in him!
It is great that the two of you spend so much time talking. It sounds as if you have successfully establish a flirtatious friendship between the two of you. You probably want to progress to the next level. You probably want to establish a romantic relationship with him.
As the woman, you should not even think about asking him out. This isn't a sexist comment. I say this because guys in our culture are taught to be emotionally lazy. They are taught to let girls do the flirting, they let girls ask for a realtionship, etc. In the meantime, they just accept sexual favours where they can get it. I am not saying guys are only interested in sex. Guys want relationships, don't get me wrong. But, relationships are hard work. Rather than focusing on relationships, guys focus on the easy part: the sex. Sure, they want a relationship. But, they assume women will work that part out for them.
If you ask him out, you will set up an awful pattern for the rest of your relationship: he will assume you will do all of the emotional work. Believe moi. It was moi who asked Kermit out, and ever since then Kermit has left all of the emotional stuff up to me. As a woman, I wish I had waited to be asked out so that I was not in charge of planning all of the romantic stuff. I would like Kermit to woo me once in awhile, and I'm sure you will feel the same way once you establish a relationship. So, get the relationship started on the right foot. Show him that he has to put effort in if he wants to be with you.
I am not saying play hard to get. I am saying be yourself, but don't make the first move. Playing hard to get is a game that guys eventually get tired of. Guys like a challenge, but if you play hard to get you can come off as disinterested or hot and cold (which only confuses guys). Don't play games with guys. They are simple and direct. Be simple and direct back.
So what can you do in the meantime? Flirting is great. Keep doing that. But, if he asks you a direct question such as "Do you like anyone?", don't play coy. Be simple and direct back. This is your opportunity. Say "Yes, I like you". Don't ask him out, but don't be afraid to be honest about your feelings IF HE ASKS.
If he asks your feelings, then he has put the work in to find out and he deserves to know. Once he knows how you feel, it will be up to him to decide whether he is ready to put in the work for a relationship or not. If so, great! If not, don't worry. There will be other guys in college.
One last word of warning. If he does ask your feelings and you say you like him, be careful of the friends with benefits trap. If you tell him you like him and he says "we should hook up some time" you have to say NO. Women often think they can tempt men into a relationship through hookups, but this is not the case. If a man asks to hook up outside of a relationship he is essentially saying "I like you, but not enough to work for it. Would you give me sex/makeout anyway, without me putting any effort in?". Value yourself enough to say no.
If you follow these guidelines, I promise you will have an amazing long-term relationship. It may or may not be with this guy. But if you keep your standards high, you will find a guy who is crazy about you and who is willing to work for it. This is better than any short term/half a**ed relationship. Hold out for the real thing, because you deserve it.
These are all of my secrets.
Miss Piggy
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