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humorist-workshop
does he really likes me ?
I really like this guy that sit next to me in
My 2nd period.let's say his name is jay.he makes me laugh.he's funny,cute,everything.he flirts with me !!! ( a lot actually ). Sometimes, he said i am his best friend to his's guy friends ( which we aren't). He would touches my hair, makes fun of my name, hugs me tight.last night, he texted me and asked if I'd like to go to the movies ( that time i was at the mall & i was bushing and ppl looked at me like I'm crazy lol).Before i even got to replied his text, he said his girlfriend moved to another state ( he never told me that he has a gf ). It just breaks my heart into pieces. I almost cried 😢 and i said,"not tonight maybe next time ?" And he said," ohh okey it's fine". I also felt like i am his second's option. And I'm afraid to see him on monday ( btw me & him are sophomore )
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Maybe he really does think of you as a close friend, I've had guy friends most of my life. Even my best friend now is a guy and pretty much what you described has been most of our friendship. Hopefully the flirting part is just part of his personality meaning to him he's sees it as harmless. And the fact that he mentioned a gf is kind of a sign that he really does see you as a friend. BUT.
Playing devil's advocate here there is always the possibility he does like you. And even threw in the gf card to see how you'd react. If that's so be careful. Someone who can have feelings or even try to get with someone else while in a relationship will do the same thing to you.
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He said she moved away. He did not say how long ago deary. But at the same time. I completely understand what you mean by second option. But by everything you have stated here, I truly believe that he does like you. Boy's are funny some times. But he is definitely keen on you! I would say go for it! If you like him, Hang out with him. He asked you to go to the movies with him, Not with a bunch of people. So that definitely sounds like a date. Go have fun. and enjoy every minute of it :)
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This is the problem with texting...it's not but bits and pieces of conversation. Like watching a movie where I have the sound controller and I keep turning it on and off and on and off so you hear only every other sentence. The conversation is not going to make sense and any sense you try to make by guessing could be very very wrong.
You jumped to a conclusion. Made you are right and he isn't interested in you to date and never was and only saw you as a friend. Howevever I am almost old enough to be your grandma so I can say from experience that his behavior is definitely the kind from a guy who is crazy about a girl.
When he said "girlfriend" he may have meant an old dating type girlfriend or perhaps he meant a girl who was a friend.
Did you ask him for clarification? You won't know all the details until you ask. Somehow I have a feeling that this Jay fellow has nothing to hide, especially if he volunteers such information to you. Perhaps he was dating this other girl at some point in the past but as soon as they found out she was moving far away, they decided to break things off rather than try to prolong something that really doesnt work well in an LDR.(long distance relationship)
Maybe his announcement was his clumsy way of letting you know that he is definitely single and available and he's now hoping for some sign from you that you are just as crazy about him in return. And unless you ask and get the timing and circumstances, how are you to know that he ever knew and met both of you at the same time so that he chose someone else first over you? What does that matter? Lets put it this way: Lets say you have a chance to date 8 guys before you meet the guy you marry. In fact, lets say that you meet his best friend first and you and that guy realize you are not the best match and decide to break up and then after, you somehow meet or are introduced to future husband. And he's perfect for you. Do you want him to reject you simply on the grounds that you had a chance to date his friend first? That's a bunch of silly hogwash!
On Monday, don't avoid him. Make sure you can a chance to talk ASAP!
There is no reason why you can't swallow your pride and actually admit to him your reaction to what he texted and what it made you think. At least he'll know he's not that good at communicating things to you. And that gives him the chance to then explain things and give you the facts.
Use your own words but for a basic idea of what to say here goes:
Jay, when you asked me to go to a movie and your next text was that your girlfriends was moving out of state, I reacted in confusion and shock and didn't know what to think, I needed some time so I said no. The reason I am so confused is because though you tell your friends that I am your best friend, the way you flirt and treat me and pay attention is not the way a guy treats a friend or best friend. You are sending me signals that you are sweet on me, attracted to me and want me to be your girlfriend. Then you say you have one but she's moving. So I need to know if you were just kidding around with me and you were never serious...in which case...thats a rotten thing to do
or if you are the kind of guy who is a player, dating several gals at the same time, never making a real commitment to one, cus thats also a rotten thing to do.
I don't have enough information to come to a good conclusion....so how about filling me in on what I am missing here, and then I will decide if I am still attracted to you or not.
If put that way, he should want to be able to explain to you if he's really interested and doest want to lose you and that last part tells him that you have been attracted to him too.
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