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Moving about an hour away, but not good with long distance relationships.
Well, let us start out with some details/background information. I am a few weeks away from being 16 and my boyfriend is 18. We've been together for a while and I love the kid to death. It's safe to say that even if we did break up; we'd be the best of friends after the fact.
I'm going to be moving somewhere an hour and a half away, he was going to move with my guardian and myself. But he has a lot in this town and we've collectively last night decided it'd be in his best interest to stay here. It was a bit upsetting. I know it doesn't seem like much only moving an hour or so away; but he's starting college, working, and he's in a well known band doing shows all over. I'll be in school for a longer period of time and going to college while in high school along with a job. We'll never really have the time to see each other at all. In all honesty I don't know what posting this will do. But I'm at a loss as to what I should do? I don't even know if it's that. Any advice?
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You're right. There isn't much to advise on, the situation is what it is. BUT...always remember that people that want to see each other MAKE time to do so. If either of you find that you have to keep asking the other to find time, it's time to respectfully let the other know that it's time to move on. And do so before the friendship gets ruined.
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Long distance is tough but at least it isn't like in a different state. An hour and half isn't too bad, but no matter how far, it is difficult.
It's up to the two of you to decide whether you guys want to stay together when you move or to break up.
People can be extremely busy and still have time for friends and significant others so if you guys make a schedule and try to find weekends to see each other then you guys can probably handle this relationship better than not seeing each other at all. Even if it's every other weekend or so.
Just try to figure out what's best for you guys.
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My second husbands daughter was going to high school while taking entry level course at college at same time and she had some time for friends, but not too much. Only difference, she did not have a job by choice so more time could be focused on school. We witnessed a certain level of stress just with how hard she was on herself but she wouldnt think of anything else and there was no boyfriend at that time. And it sounds like your boyfriend also will have his hands full with school, job and band gigs and practice. I understand why its best he stays put but not what the reason is that you need to move. Is it job related for the guardian? If not, is there any way they could stay for two more years where you are until you turn 18? But even then, with the schedules you two have, I dont see where there would be time to see each other. Perhaps making the trip to go watch his band perform but that is just an occasional thing. You can always keep in touch easiest between places you need to be, be using the computer, FB, instagram or seeing him on cam on Skype. Make sure to put school first but talk to your Guardian about necessity of move or if any visits can be done on weekends where both of you have time to see each other. And perhaps your guardian also will have friends to go visit at the same time. If your guardian knows your boyfriend that well that he was welcome to move with you, I am sure they will understand the need for occasional visits and be willing to do so. Otherwise, last possibility is the boyfriend gives this a try and finds its too hard for him to be away and he'd rather take you all up on the offer to move to where you are and transfer college at a later date. He could probably find another job but it may come down to having to give up the band to be near you.
Blessings to you this year.
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