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I want someone I can go give head to that can keep it quiet
Me and a old friend of mine used to give orel sex to eachother when we was like 13 we both have a serious relationship with girls but for some reason I can't quit wanting to do it again. But don't know ho w to go about asking him about it cuz I would lose everything if anyone found out. It's also kinda odd cuz we havnt really talked in a few years and we are both 21 now and I am afraid he might have grew out of those thoughts now.
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You could be right and it might have been more of an exploring your sexuality thing when you both were young. There's no way to know unless you ask him. Although since you haven't talked in years, if you start up convo again with him, i wouldn't make that the first question you ask, leave it for a later conversation asking something like, Hey do you remember when we were young and used to.....
and then ask him if he grew out of it or if that still interests him.
However, I think before you take any action like that, you decide what you really want, and who you really are inside and be able and ready to accept it. What I am trying to say is, you mentioned being fearful of losing "everything" if anyone found out that you have an interest in men.
I assume by the statement "serious relationship" that you truly have a sexual interest in the female and are not attempting to force yourself into a mold of desiring females sexually when you don't, or trying to deny and cover up that you desire both. Only you know what is truly your desire. Don't lie to yourself. Be honest and own up to it, you may be Bi-sexual. While in general, it is no one's business to know what your sexual preferences and lifestyle is, it is entirely important to be open and honest with anyone with whom you are also sexual or have a serious relationship that may lead to being sex partners.
Keeping it hidden is a bad choice for several reasons.
She may be totally straight and not want to share you with another female or male.
Oral herpes and other things can be passed to the genital so theres always a possibility that you contract something from the guy and pass it to her or from her and pass it to the guy.
Secrecy builds walls and tears down trust in a relationship. Yes if you tell the truth, you may lose her but she should have the choice to decide and not find out by accident at which point there'll be more hurt and pain and fighting and perhaps hatred between you and her. All that can be avoided by being willing to be truthful up front and risk losing her. I can tell you right now that the statistics are that the majority of women are straight hetero sexual and nothing else and they will not want their partner to be anything else. I used to read up on statistics for polyamory, under which you find hetero sexual people with other hetero sexual partners, bi sexual women and bi sexual men who have other partners than their marriage partner or domestic relationship partner. The best guess is that only one in every two hundred people is polyamorous in one way or the other.
Before continueing on with the girl, you may want to take time, while not in a relationship with her, unless you're willing to come open and talk to her about your feelings here,
and take that time to go explore your sexuality with a grown male to see if this is something you are really drawn to and greatly wish and desire as much as you desire women. If so, then you need to be open and honest with a female from the start. You may find yourself needing to search on the web for local bi-sexual or polyamorous sites where you can meet people. Some areas of the country will be more likely to have these hidden alternative sexual communities. Some of the bigger metropolitan cities will, but its least likely in the bible belt area of the U.S.
If you take time to explore men whether it works out with your friend or not, and you can discover that it was interesting in fantasy but in reality, it didn't do anything for you, then continue on with a strictly female partner only and never look back.
If you wonder why you should give it a try now, its because you have grown and matured a lot since then. You were basically an older kid/young teen compared to a young adult now. And don't be disgusted with yourself. Exploring your sexuality is an important thing to do, no matter what age. If you are single unattached, its easy, but it's complicated when you are in a relationship.
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