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I'm pregnant and my husband keeps tell me I'm fat
I'm 7 months pregnant and my husband keeps joking that I'm fat and I need to loose weight. I gained weight in my face. I was skinny before I was pregnant & I know I won't be skinny after I give birth. But he keeps calling me fat it really hurts my feelings because I feel like he thinks I am disgusting. What should I do?
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I think you should have a heart to heart conversation with your husband. Tell him how you really feel and tell him how much it really hurts when he calls you fat and makes fun of you. Maybe he'll understand and maybe he'll stop. Good luck!
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Quietly and calmly tell him to shut the fuck up the next time he does it.
Tell him that saying things like that is hard to deal with because you have gained weight and you feel insecure, and every time he says it he puts you under stress you do not need, and stress is bad for the baby.
If he blows you off, ask him how he'd feel if you started joking that you've always felt like his dick was just a little too small.
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Pardon me if I'm direct but your husband is an ass. The most beautiful thing in the world is a pregnant woman. You are preparing to bring a new life into this world. If all he is concerned about is your appearance then if I were you I would be seriously thinking about seeing a lawyer and making sure that me and the baby were properly cared for before serving him with divorce papers.
This is not a man who has ever looked beyond the exterior you. He is wanting a trophy wife and is not interested in what lies beneath the exterior, the real you. The caring you, the wife and mother. I know this sounds harsh but this is what I see.
I also do not see him making a good father. If all he wants from you is a trophy wife. Then all he will want from his children is for them to be seen and not heard. To be trotted out at the appropriate time to show off; that he is a true family man. The rest of the time you will be on your own caring for the child or children.
Not knowing your husband I cannot say why a trophy wife is important to him. In general men who want Trophy wives are in high profile jobs where having trophy wives are a great help in moving up the corporate ladder. The same with children. Most large corporation or firms such as Law or accounting want to show off their Partners and Senior associates as family men.
As far as being skinny again after the birth of your child. You may not get back to your original dress size as being pregnant can cause hips and pelvis area even your ribs to be pushed out some. The weight you gain can be lost and that is up to you.
I said I was going to direct and I believe I have been. I did not like your husband comment I think it is cruel and I think it says a lot about him. I could be wrong and for your sake I hope I am. Unfortunately I have been doing this a long time and I don't feel that I am wrong. That fact that you felt the need to write us for help tells me I just may have called a spade a spade.
In any case I have given you something to think about. If you want to expand upon your husband or have other questions feel free to write me in the private message area and I will respond.
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Have you brought it to his attention and let him know it hurts your feelings and you do not want him to ever talk to you like that? You did not clarify if you said anything to him about it.That would be the first step.
However, I doubt that is enough to help change things for the better if this has been his behavior in general before and you just never took notice of it until now.
If you have said something and he is still doing this kind of behavior, I would suggest going to marriage counseling. A woman needs a man to be supportive no matter what IF he is truly in love with her, and even more so during pregnancy when you are carrying his child. Notice that I capitolized "IF", because he may like you, love you in words but not know how to love you in actions. Or as was my case with my ex, he was never in love with me to begin with but he wanted to marry more so that he wasn't alone.
Your husband, as an adult should know better than to talk to you or anyone like that.
It could be a sign of a bigger problem. The fact that he does it shows he does not really care how it affects you, he is insensitive, so I can tell he is not a very supportive and encouraging man.
Also, it is a very childish behavior. This sounds like what goes on in middle school and high school...so I am guessing that he never really grew up and matured mentally and emotionally.
If his supposed love for you was only skin deep, then any changes to how you look now or permanently after childbirth may not sit well with him and could be the reason he says such things now, because subconsciously what he is attracted to does not match what you look like. The problem lies with him...NOT with how you look. There are many men who find a beauty in the pregnant female form, especially if the child is his. They also find other pregnant females beautiful. Its not cover girl model beauty but it is a different kind of beauty....there is no comparing. On an aside, very obviously pregnant women are sexually arousing to their husbands and to many men, so much so that the porn trade has sites of pregnant women for men who have a fetish for that. Never let anyone tell you that being pregnant means you can't be sexy still.
You will be more sensitive to anything related to how you look because Lots of women can have self image issues during pregnancy, and there is the overflow of emotions as well added to the mix. It is a difficult time to begin with. So I come back to the original suggestion that you both get counseling. Good luck dear.
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