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hello
my mother is currently in jail until February for a financial crime and I am her 14 year old daughter. My dad said to find and write her a card to send her there since her birthday will be coming up. I have no problem doing this but some would say it is a bad thing since I would be supporting a criminal. Personally since her crime wasn't against me I think it is OK to support her in some ways like potentially sending her some books or something. If I do decide to send a card what should I write in it (I am horrible at thinking up more than one line to write) and was thinking of getting one of those jail themed related cards on the internet but then it might seem I am making fun of her, though I know she won't mind being teased like that
also, is this weird, I have talked to my on the phone while she is there and for some reason I feel more comfortable being open with her about anything now then when she was actually here. Any reason why I would feel that way now?
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Ok, you gotta get the idea out of your head that communicating with your mom is supporting a criminal. It isn't. Yea she broke the law and she's in jail sure, but she's the woman that raised you and it's not like you're sending her letters encouraging her criminal behavior. She's still your mother regardless of what she has done in her life.
I'm not sure what her sense of humor is like, I personally would wait until after the jail thing to start joking about it, but maybe she would be ok with it, I dont know. If you talk to her on the phone, you could probably just write something along the lines of "happy birthday, I miss you and ive been thinking about you. Love you". Just something to let her know that you love her and think about her.
I'm thinking that you might be able to talk to her easier now because now you know something about her. You now know a big thing about her, she is in jail for a financial crime. it's sort of like a big secret that she has shared with you similar when a friend entrusts you with a secret of theirs, you feel more compelled to trust them and be open. It may also just be that talking over the phone is easier than talking in person because neither of you are doing things or distracted by other daily stresses.
Again, it's a unique situation and everyone that's ever experienced it will handle it in a different way. Nothing you do, none of your coping mechanisms, are weird.
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