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Feel bad after a one night stand
So I am NOT the type of person who sleeps around.
But this week I lost my V to someone at Uni. Whilst they were not a complete stranger, I had only known they existed for about a week.
So this person was all like 'I'll text you' and things, and basically I have heard nothing.
I just feel terrible. For a few days ago I felt elated that I'd finally done the deed so to speak. At the same time though, I now also feel like I was used and abit worthless.
Don't go telling me that that's what you sign up to when having a one night stand please-how can I make myself feel better.
More importantly, will I see this person around and should I add them on facebook, considering we talked at length about our lives and things first.
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Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Virginity?
The best thing to do after a one night stand is to focus on yourself. Reflect on yourself about what kinds of things do you want to improve in your life? And then go out and pursue those things. Focus on YOU and don't worry about 'what if he texts me' 'what if i see him'.. he's a jerk for using you and then not even apologizing, explaining or talking to you afterwards. forget him and focus on yourself! Make some goals for yourself and you'll feel 100 times better when you achieve them:)
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1) You need to forgive him it is hard but it needs to be done.
2) Forgive yourself
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The reason you're feeling bad about it is because you're looking at this as a loss, not a gain.
The loss being thinking that virginity is something to lose and happens when you have sex. The gain being this is one of the many steps along the way of discovering your sexuality and making your sexual debut.
The concept of virgins and virginity was never a scientifically correct concept to begin with. So you didn't lose anything.
Can two lesbians or gay men consider themselves to be virgins forever just because there wasnt a meeting of two different parts (vagina and penis) as in intercourse. There is much more that defines us and our sexuality than just intercourse.
If the attraction you had to the guy was strictly sexual and even though you 'talked' you were never attracted to his personality, and who he is on the inside, then there is no reason to ask to have him as a facebook friend or even a real friend. This is all part of what we need to learn, the attractions, our likes and dislikes in another person. You don't like every girl you meet for a female friend. It should be no different for a guy. The only thing different is there should be sexual attraction and more, a sexual compatibility.
Maybe he used you. It's not a big deal unless you don't learn from it, how to spot a guy like that and maybe change some of your behaviour such as making such a commitment after only a week. Not saying it cant happen and be perfect, just that it usually doesn't. Its only a bad deal if you allow it to happen to yourself several more times.
I would like to refer you to a site done by a 23 yr old who has been doing videos geared for teen and college age to educate on sexuality, dating and relationships. Short 3-ver accurate information...she's done her studying.
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Look up especially her ones on virginity but I love em all and I am grandma age. Wish this was around when I was your age.
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