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Engagement at 14
I am 14 and my bf is 16 he proposed to me and I said yes but Ian a bit worried about what everyone keeps saying online about it being too young please help.
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You are still a minor to start off, and who the fuck would get married at 14 or 16? (you) people nowadays are so far ahead of themselves, it's almost cute. I am the same age as you and I have no thoughts of marrying my girlfriend. (at least as of now)
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Yeah, you're way too young.
Don't try to get married before you're 18. You can only do that with parental permission so assuming your parents aren't batshit insane that's not really a problem.
Remember one thing for me. If you change your mind later, it's alright. You're 14, you don't have a clue what to want in a man you'd spend your life with. This period of your life is for starting to find out.
So date him. Be "engaged" or whatever. If you decide you don't like him, break off the engagement. It happens in the adult world all the time, so I'm sure there's no problem with you doing it.
And do yourself a favor, if somehow this does last until you're 18, give it two more years. Move out and go to college. Live alone or with roommates, but not him. Have an independent life, go to school, get a job or something, and pay some of your own bills. Be your own person and feel what it's like to live your own life. Figure out if this guy fits into that life that you want to live for yourself or not.
Don't marry anyone until you figure that out.
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Well first of all, you are too young to get married. It's not even legal.
Are you planning on staying engaged for years and then getting married after school?
If so, then I really don't know why you'd bother getting engaged rather than just staying boyfriend and girlfriend.
That's just my opinion. You could just start with promise rings to promise yourselves to each other or something rather than actually getting engaged.
I'm 18 and I still am not ready to get married. It's a big commitment. Plus since you are young, you don't really know each other until you live together and see how he is when he's not in high school, if that makes any sense. Does he have a job? Does he have enough money to support you? I mean when you get married, your parents stop taking care of you and then it's his job. You'll most likely both need jobs and he'll have to pay for your food, finances, ect.
Anyways, you should probably move a little slower. You can stay with him and be committed to him but you don't have to be engaged so early in life.
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You are way to young, At 14 and 16 is where you are beginning to experience dating.
Like adviceman
said below, You are legally to young to marry.
Do you both have jobs? Live on your own? Pay your own bills? Do you attend school and live at home with your parents? ...
Clearly and obviously you are no where ready for marriage. I didn't marry till I was 25, Marriage was the last thing on my mind at 14. You are still a kid and until you reach the legal age of 18, You are a minor.
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Depending where you live you may be legally too young to be legally engaged. Here in the states there is a law called age of consent. In most of the states that age is now 18 years of age.
What age of consent means is you can not consent to things such as sex or marriage, sign contracts or drop out of school if you are under the age of consent.
Other countries, particularly western countries have similar laws and the age of consent will differ from one to another. Certain religions may hold that you may marry at your young age but the law of the land will always trump the religious laws.
With all this being said and not knowing anything else about you such as where you live or religious beliefs that could be behind this. I would say that being engaged is one thing and being married is another.
If you do not plan to marry until you finish school then the heck with what others say, enjoy your engagement. Just remember to check the law to see at what age you are legally able to consent to marry before planning a wedding.
Note: On the other hand I do think you and you Fiancée are a little too young to be in such a committed relationship. Your teenage years are a time to mature and learn how to be an adult. Part of this is by being with other people. Dating others and seeing what other people are all about.
Years ago what you are feeling right now would be called puppy love, a first love. It is real and it will hurt if you break up and just about everyone does. This is all part of growing up.
I can't and I will not tell you what to do as it is not right in this instance for me to do so. What I will tell you is not to listen to people when they tell you how to live your life. This is your life and you should live it as you feel you should. You will make mistakes, this is a given. But this is how we learn.
If I think it is wrong to be engaged at 14, well that is my right. IF you ask for my opinion then I will give it. You have not asked for my opinion only my help which I hope I have given you.
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