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How do you deal with your own heart in this ?
Hey guys,
Look. I've a problem which i believe is my fault as well. The thing is, i'm still in my teen year, below 19 and for some reason, i feel as if.. i don't know. I want to focus on studies and get a great university in the future, in two 1/2 years time and i don't.. i don't want this feeling. I don't know if it's love or not but i genuinely care for him (same age, but oceans apart, have known him for two years) , he's been through excruciating hardship all these while and all i really want is for him to enjoy his life.
I'd say i'm semi-jovial but thinking of him makes me unhappy. I want him to be happy too. The reason of this feeling is unknown. Another confession is, i did tell him 'Love you' several times but no longer as a friend (don't know if he realises it or not). I mean those words. I would travel there if he needs me to, and i'd be there for him and i'll listen no matter what.
I just.. i don't know it does hurt at the same time too. He did say he liked me before, and he didn't care even if we're of different races or lives but that was before, time and feelings change. I don't know if he has a girlfriend or a crush, but if he does then i'd still be happy for him.
Guys, help me. How do you let your own heart know that you don't want to like a great guy more than a friend anymore? Gotta move on, tried to but failed. How to stop thinking of him and miss him? How?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
So you met on internet and likely haven't in person. I will tell you what I learned myself in on-line dating. The person you click with on-line you may not do so with in person. One possibility is you may lack the chemistry. . . no matter how nice he is. It is something I could pick up on in the kiss of greeting...no sparks, no electricity, like being kissed by your brother not a potential lover.
Or the person I was falling for on-line when I finally met in person was nothing at all like he had presented himself to be.
So I am saying there is no guarantee that he would have worked out anyways. Tell that to yourself. All feelings and emotions come from your sub conscious mind. The sub conscious is what also dreams. So if this is what you want to do, visualize yourself getting on a plane and arriving there. He meets you at the airport. You are so excited when you spot him that you run into his arms and he gives you and long hard kiss. Halfway through it though you want to squirm away because it doesn't feel right. You don't like the smell of his breath or the taste or the feel of his kiss. Instead it is turning your stomach. You are beginning to panic cus your there for a 5 day visit and can't imagine how you'll make it through. He'll likely want to make love and you can't even get past the kiss. You try to ignore it go to his place. Walking through his door is like being assaulted by something unpleasant, his place is much too disorganized, cluttered and unpleasant feeling for you. (this happened to me 1st time I went to one really sweet kind man's place.) He starts talking and he has a speech impediment you cant get past, maybe a lisp or he stutters,he's sounds extremely nasel, or a high voice like a female. You thought you could handle it in small talk in the car but now you find this is overload. So right there you tell him that this is not going to work out. If you could, you'd fly home tomorrow... If you can truly picture this in your mind, like watching a movie and get into the emotions of it, this means you have captured the attention of your subconscious, she will decide she is repulsed by him and drop of feelings of the ideal of love she had for him. Good luck.
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