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How do I stop others from flirting with my girl friend?
Me and my girl friend have been on and off for about seven months now but were currently on a firm relationship but lots of guys usually flirt with her and i do have a bit of an anger problem so usually i just walk out of the room quick and calm myself down, but what pisses me off the most is that she acts like she likes it and i don't want to be mean because some of the people that flirt with her are my friends. I do push them away but not all the time because i don't want to seem overprotective. I trust her but every man has his limits ya know. I just don't know what to do anymore. Help?
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We this is where trust is important in a relationship. You have to TRUST that she loves you the way you love her and that she would never do anything to hurt you. And your reaction when other men flirt with her is normal. You're a man and you don't like other men trying to take something or someone that you deserve away from you. But the next time you find yourself getting angry, remember this: YOU GOT THE GIRL!
No guy can just take your place as her boyfriend with just a few pick up lines.
And if your girlfriend is acting like she likes it, then you should calmly and rationally talk to her about it and let her know how you feel. Women are amazing and mysterious at the same time, but they're not mind-readers. You have to talk to your girlfriend to let her know how you feel.
And another thing. If your friends are constantly hitting on her, then you should talk to them, set some boundaries and most importantly, encourage them to get their own girlfriends. You have to be really lonely or really unfaithful to hit on your best friend's girl.
I hope this helped.
~Andrew~
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Flirting is a natural thing some people do at times their whole life long. It does not mean they want the relationship with the other person, especially if the other is already taken.
One thing about women, is that they can be truly dedicated and hopelessly in love with their man. Even if their man gives them plenty of compliments as to how beautiful and hot she is, once in a relationship for a while, like a marriage, women start to wonder if its something hubby says out of habit to keep her happy or that she is only pretty to him, not to other males out there is in whole.
There is something that strokes the ego to have a man wink at me or flirt with me, even though I am happily married and dont want a relationship let alone sex with another man. Men need the same thing too...don't kid yourself. Once married a while and having had babies spit up on you and kids in the cart at the grocery store, for a woman to look at you and smile, wink or say something like, what a cute little boy... so handsome, just like daddy. And then she goes her way and you never see her again. That boosts a guys ego as much as it does a womans.
Flirting does not mean that your guy friends want to steal her away from you. If they wanted to steal her away and get her into bed, they would be trying a lot more than flirting with her right in front of you. There is a code of honor with guys. Doesnt matter which one of them finds a girl first. They may not know how to talk to a female and so just flirt with her. Or, they feel she is a safe person to practice flirting skills with so they can go out and find their own girl later on. If your male friends are the type who would go behind your back to get to her, they would not do anything like flirting with her in front of her guy to draw attention to their interest in her. I mean, think of it man, if it were you, would you be that stupid to flirt with a buddys girl right in front of him, if you wanted to convince her to run away with you?
They are red blooded males like yourself...this is normal behavior. If your buddies do not live by a high code of ethics and would actually attempt to steal her behind your back, then you are hanging out with the wrong guys. If the girl who is crazy about you is soo easily coaxed away by another guy, buddy or not, then she is not the right kind of gal for you if you want someone committed to a relationship. But you can not suspect anyone of that behavior and treat them accordingly. If constantly questioning your friends to their face of their actions you may lose their freindship. If you harrass your girl for enjoying the innocent flirts, smiling back, then you will drive her away. Or she becomes so afraid of you that she changes who she is to please you. That backfires man. You will lose respect at some point for anyone who changes who they are to please others because they are not being true to themselves.
It is good that you are aware of your anger problem and step out of the room to calm your self. Long term though, it will not get at whatever underlying issues or thoughts are deep inside you that bring on these reactions. are you comparing yourself to others and feel that you are lacking somehow? Do you have a need for reassurances? Perhaps you have never talked about and you do not know what it is about you that has caused her to choose you over other guys? Everyone has personal likes in others. Beauty IS in the eye of the beholder. What one girlfriend of mine thinks is a hot movie star for example just doesnt come across the same to me.
If your relationship is so new 7 months of not even being consistant, then yes you can easily being feeling a bit insecure because the two of you haven't even figured out what you like about each other over anyone else. Focus your attention on that.Get to a place of feeling secure in how special and unique you are to her. She needs to hear the same from you. Why her over all the females you could possibly with? If it's all based on looks, she will be insecure thinking that the next pretty face could pull you away. What it is you like about who she is inside? Once you feel more secure after having some talks about what you both are attracted to in each other and you know she truly has her heart set on you...
Try to work up to staying in the room with your friends while they flirt next time. test that security inside you. If you still feel insecure...maybe you truly did not believe her. Perhaps you have deeper issues that might be best addressed by seeing a counselor. If you find difficulty with constant anger and jealousy and never progressing to get beyond it on your own...you will want to see the counselor or forever have this insecurity come between you and a meaningful relationship. the biggest battle right now seems to be in your mind, your thoughts. If you work on that, you should be able to get past it. Good luck.
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