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How to face challenges and be more wise in life ?
Hi guys, if you must know i'm 18. The problem is, i'm in a downward spiral so yes, i need some advice. I know people out there face tougher challenges, but i know my life will get worse too if i don't face 'em. I'm starting to cling onto people to get happiness and my self-esteem is breaking down. It's not even there anymore ! I have a wide family but not all of them can be trusted. Not all. I have lots of friends but hey, i could even count with my fingers the ones who're really true. I'm facing rejection by the ones i would sactifice for. I don't really need guys in my life but i do really love one guy who seems to.. I don't know. We're no longer close and i break down every night missing him. Anyhow, I could no longer stress out due to the fact that i'm beginning to have detrimental heart problems because of the problems i'm facing and i admit my wrongdoings are involved too. I just need an advice on how to be wise and independent in life. I still believethat i can be a good person too, i just don't want to give up. Please help me, i can't go on feeling so messed up anymore. Thanks guys.
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
My advice, speaking from experience, have a SHIT TON of fun.
Go out, hit the clubs, party, shake hands and wave to people you've never met before in you're life.
be "That outgoing person" it may be a mask, but, that mask will melt into you. Like me, I was down to the point of secretly attempting suicide and some awful drug abuse, but, I quite the b.s, and became excessively friendly, I go with the crowd, and please the crowd, take outrageous dares, it'll be quite awesome.
As for the guy, I had a similar issue, my advice on that is: Give him an ultimatum, and don't feel bad if it goes south, intend it to go south, act as if his holding you back from your gorgeous plan B, if you just keep living crazily, day by day, in a seemingly unending search for amusement, you'll get past it.
Oh, and btw, Don't stay up late, in the dark, by yourself, unless you're playing videogames, you own thoughts fuck you up, Get some sleep
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You seem to have identified the problem as low self-esteem for yourself already and that can be rebuilt. Bit by bit, day by day. And things look very different once you've got a better self-image. A few of your comments...well friends we can trust unquestionably are few in number. And it's easy to create that perfect, understanding 'soul mate' in someone who isn't around now. It's the 'clinging' trait that you know yourself isn't the answer. Only it's an idea you're clinging to. Self-esteem comes from within yourself.
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You're 18 now so this is the beginning of life for you. You have so much ahead of you. If you're stressed and depressed and you feel like you can't talk to family or friends. Then talk to your doctor so she/he can recommend someone for you. She/He may also recommend a prescription if needed. Please don't let life issues or anything you may have done get to you, stress you out. Especially if it's making you sick, you have to take care of yourself. You're stronger than you think, you can get through this. Love yourself and don't be so hard on yourself. We all make mistakes in life, no one is perfect, but it's all about picking up the pieces and doing better. Never give up on you, push yourself to do better, to be better. You're smart, independent, strong and wise. You just have to BELIEVE it. If you need counseling, don't be afraid or embarrassed to get the help you need to become a better you. I hope everything works out for you... #BestWishes
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There is not a lot of information to go on here. Not having trust in people and sounding as down on yourself as you do are two signs of depression. Just two signs is not enough to say you are depressed or suffering from a depressive episode or clinical depression. Besides I'm not a doctor and I can't make that call.
What I do suggest, what I think will help you is meeting with a psychologist for some talk therapy. Finding a therapist who you feel comfortable enough to tell your deepest, darkest secrets to may take going through 2 or more therapist until you find someone your comfortable with. It is worth effort for once you find that therapist you can now talk openly with him or her secure in the knowledge that nothing said in therapy can every be retold outside of therapy even in a court of law. You have total medical confidentiality.
Being 18 these visits would be covered under your parents insurance coverage and or one or both of their EAP programs at work. The EAP programs generally cover a select number of visits in full then health insurance kicks in.
Stress is the major cause of most depressive symptoms. Talking about them to someone unrelated and set back from your day to day life can be a big help in getting a handle on things which may be getting away from you. Which just may be your problem and you are not seeing it.
If you want you can go see your family doctor first and get a full physical which the therapist should recommend anyway. While there your doctor, if you ask, can test you for depression. The test is simple. It is simply questions the doctors ask that by your responses they can determine if you are suffering some form of depression. Then the doctor will most likely suggest talk therapy as well.
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