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My favourite teacher is leaving :(
Ok, so bascially I get on really well with one of my teachers, to the point that it borders on a crush. He's never actually taught me but he is the teacher who knows me best at the school and has done so much for me during my time at the school.
I'm 15 and he's in his late 20's so I know nothing can happen between us, but I genuinely love him as a friend and person. Things at school have been going really well lately and me and him have been getting closer than ever.
The problem is he is leaving at the end of the school year and I don't know how to cope without him. I was getting to the point where I was beginning to deal with it but then another bombshell hit today. He's not just moving to a different school, he's moving really far away and I will literally never see him again.
I really want to talk to him about it but I don't know what to say - he hasn't announced to the school that he's leaving yet... Please help!
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Maybe you could find a way to keep in contact with him, like on facebook. I'm friends with old teachers on facebook and it's not considered innapropriate. You could talk to him about how youre going to miss and ask him if theres a way you could still keep in contact or see him, in a friend/mentor sort of way. You could email or message each other on facebook, asking how one another is once in a while and I wouldnt consider that innapropriate, ive done that before. Just talk to him openly about it and if you can find out ways to talk to him thatd be great. I hope everything works out okay and that you can still keep in touch. And maybe when you're 18 your relationship with him can be more casual and you could talk to each other more, like on the phone etc. Alright well good luck!
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Unfortunately this is all part of life. I can only speculate as to why he is moving. He has either received a better teaching position in another State; or possible his significant other has received a better job offer and he is following knowing how in demand teachers are and he will have no trouble finding a new position.
It is always hard to loose a friend. The adult thing to do would to go up to him and thank him for being your friend and mentor. Tell him how much his friendship and mentoring has helped you and that while you are going to miss him you wish him the best of luck. You can also work in to your conversation that replacing him as a friend will be hard, harder yet will be finding a new mentor.
If he is the teacher you make him out to be he should pick up on that cue and offer someone as a replacement at least as a mentor. Since you already know he is leaving you don't have to wait for a formal announcement to speak with him.
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I remember connecting with the school nurse, back when they had one on duty all day every day. She was so caring and easy to talk to. I was one of 5 girls that liked to stop by and talk to her every day. Some people are so open and non judgemental and willing to treat everyone as an equal, not beneath them. I am sure that these are some of the qualities in him you are attracted to.
If he hasn't announced this news to the school yet but has told you directly in conversation, that means he values your friendship and out of wanting to be considerate, did not want you to discover this in a school wide generic announcement.
Note that your teen and college years will be a learning training ground for what characteristics you like in friends,,(girlfriends included) so you hang with a good crowd, and even more so, traits you see in a guy that you tuck away in memory for the time that comes when you are looking for a long term relationship or even perhaps further in the future, a marriage partner. We don't always connect with everyone like this so treasure it for what it is, nothing more.
Back to the school nurse, I asked if she wouldn't mind my having her phone number to keep in touch from time to time after I graduated. This was before pc's. email and facebook. She was willing and she came at my invite twice to my home for kind of a mini reunion with the other 4 girls who had befriended her.
What I would suggest is telling him that you value his friendship and know you will miss the talks you've had. Ask if he is willing to become a facebook friend. I would not recommend asking for a phone number. That is too personal and intrudes on his personal life. Facebook can be answered when he has the time do. Reassure him that you ask only in friendship, nothing else. If he is willing, then keep in touch, within reason, it won't be the same as it was in person. You may experience friendship withdrawals despite this.
If he says no, then you will have to honor his request although I can't imagine him saying no.
Once he is gone, other's will come into your life whom you will find attracted to their personality, whether they're your age, the elderly neighbor that moved in next door the clerk at your favorite store. Take note of what you like and don't like about certain personalities, for it will serve you well when it comes time for you to do serious dating if you haven't already started. I suggest waiting til you graduate so you can focus on studies. Grades drop when the mind is occupied with all the intricacies of dating.
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