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I love my fiance, but I'm attracted to other men
I'm a 23 year old female, working and studying. I've been with my boyfriend for 6years and we recently got engaged. I have had feelings for other men throughtout this relationship, but I never did anything about it. I went away for a few months and met this guy from jordan - we started seeing each other and now he says he love me etc. I don't want to give up what I have with my fiance, but at the same time I want to run away with this other guy or sometimes just run away on my own and disappear. If I do, I'm sure I will lose my family and friends, because he is another nationality.I'm a very pessimistic person - so I don't believe either of them when they say they love me no matter what. I believe all people are bound to be cheaters, might be becuase of my past.my fiance is more than amazing though. He loves me no matter what I do or say. He wants to provide for me - and he knows me inside and out.everyone LOVES him and say I'm the luckiest girl alive. I have clearly landed jackpot with him - but why am I still reaching out to other guys...? At this moment: reaching out to this guy.I don't want to say too much about myself as it may give away who I am. So I will just say I'm from a conservative part of the world and English isn't my first language.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Ask your boyfriend if he would be all right with an open relationship. Seriously. Then you don't have to worry about cheating, as long as you honestly tell him what is going on.
If you can't or won't do that, here's my other advice: you are basically experiencing the 7 year itch. You are currently questioning whether or not you want to be with your fiance for the rest of your life. The good news is even if you continue your relationship with him, you don't have to be with him for the rest of your life. The bad news is you have to do some very honest thinking with yourself whether or not this is what you want. If it's not, you owe it to your boyfriend to be honest. You are only 23, it is not a big deal if you break up. You have been together since you were a teenager, and a lot of things have changed in 6 years.
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It's perfectly normal to be sexually attracted to other people, even if you are loyal and committed to your fiance.
Being attracted to someone else doesn't have to mean you relationship is doomed, or that you don't love your partner enough - it just means you are a human being with a healthy sex drive.
Cheating is wrong, of course, and you know you should stop.
However, it sounds like there is a lot more going on here. You some more generally unhappy with your life, and your plans for the future. Are you looking forward to married life? Are you excited by the life you are building together? Do you and your fiance have the same ideas about what that life will be like?
What is feeding your dissatisfaction with your life? Is it money stress? What do you want that you aren't getting? More education, more friends? Why are you trying to create a crisis in your relationship by reaching out to this other guy?
We don't have the answers, but until you figure them out, you shouldn't get married. I don't think your issues necessarily mean don't love your fiance, but they do mean you have some work to do before you can enter into any relationship honestly.
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From an outsiders point of view, You do not sound happy.
You're relationship is missing something or you would not have a strong desire to be with other men. You may indeed love your fiance, but do you love him enough to marry him and be his wife?
You believe that everyone is prone too cheating but what you are missing here is cheating is also a choice. A very dishonest and hurtful choice.
You need to really sort out your true feelings to whether you want to be with your fiance or other men. It is not fair to lead him on as it is not only lying to him but to yourself. If you want other men then yes, You need to be hinest and tell him.
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