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How to have a party at 15? Do you think this will get me more popular or will they just use me and forget about me the next day?
Hey im 15 and in my school i am reasonably popular but i am probably in the second tier.there is a 'popular group' which i have friends in at school but i have never quite broken in to that group.i dont get invited out with them or get invited to house parties which is tough for me.to show people i can be fun i am considering having a house party.people will DEFINATELY drink but my parents are completely against that so i dont know how i could do that unless they werent there.also,how can i keep a guest list low enough without everyone getting invited by others.and since i never get invited,do people just listen to music and talk at these parties or what? Do you think this will get me more popular or will they just use me and forget about me the next day?Thanks for any help i recieve
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It would be a critical mistake not to have adults on the premises during any party. Have them stay upstairs unless their is a problem and let them be the ones to boot anybody you need gone. Just tell them privately and have them come down and escort anyone out who shouldn't be there.
You can't control people's choices and behavior but you can remove alcohol and drugs from the equation and let your parents control this. Don't have alcohol on the premises and lock it up. If anyone shows up with booze or drugs get your parents involved.
The thing you have to understand is that underage drinking is illegal. If anyone drinks and the police come you all get charged. You are legally responsible for them and by law if God forbid they drive drunk and perish you're held accountable.
If you have never been to a party or hosted one perhaps have it at your place but enlist your best-friend as an assistant party planer and ideas person so it's a success and co-host it.
It is possible to hold a party that is booze and drug free that is still fun and safe. One thing you could do is limit the guest list only to those you want there.
Take 15 people max and explain that it's an event that you and your friend are throwing that will be off the chain but free of drugs and alcohol but with everything you would expect at a party except that your parents are making sure kids are safe while enjoying themselves.
If your friends don't like this than that's okay. Your real friends will show up and support. I know you want to be "popular" and liked by those kids but I will tell you a secret. You're a leader and they are all followers of the head ram in the flock.
They're also usually into drugs or booze and wrecking themselves with it, sex when not ready and other problems. It's not cracked up to be what you think it is.
Some of the "popular" people you invite may genuinely like you and be "good kids" like yourself and will be good friends and interested party or no party. I think you know who they are and they should be invited.
You need to keep this controlled by your parents with the number of kids as you can manage 10-15 but more than that... Give your parents a list of who you invited and who you don't want in your house and why and let them be the bad guys not you.
Will you be "used" by people looking for free booze, drugs etc. or a place to hook-up or whatever other bad scenario--yes but once they know there are rigid rules they won't attend. But the "popular" kids who genuinely like you will. Trust me, if you and your friend come up with a party that is off the chain minus the booze people will go.
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As much as this sounds like a good idea, it's probably not. You have to admit, you don't really know what you're doing. This is a risky idea and it's more likely to damage your popularity than boost it. It sounds like you're not sure what people do at parties so what makes you qualified to host one? It could end up being a total disaster. The other issue is the drinking thing. You say that there will definitely be alcohol, but that your parents won't allow it. What's your plan for that? If someone calls the cops you'd be in serious, serious trouble. It's best to just not do this. Like I said, the risk is huge for this being a disaster. A better idea would be to work on your popular friends to try to get invited to someone else's party first. It's a bad, bad idea to just decide to host one and expect everything to go perfectly. If you put yourself out there acting as if you're already popular and you aren't, no matter what you do it will likely be ridiculed. What's the big deal with popularity anyway? Like sure it would be nice, but I'd rather be a step down from it like you are. There's so much pressure that comes along with being popular. You're actually in a great position now and honestly, it a few years this will have zero bearing on anything in your life whatsoever. What seems so important to you today, you won't even remember once you're in college. If you want to become popular, wait until college where you're starting with a clean slate. It may seem like an eternity, but it's really not that long. Just enjoy yourself and don't stress about this. When you're older you'll look back and wonder why you wasted your time even thinking about it. I realize that this is at least partially consuming your thoughts (why else would you write a question about it), but this is not the thing to be spending your days mulling over. Stop sitting around trying to be popular and fill your time with something positive. Good luck!
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