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Bisexual... maybe?
So, a few years back when I was pretty much still a dumb teenager, I experimented with another girl, but I was too scared to make anything out of it because all my friends were ganging up on us about it and every time we were finished doing something together, I would feel awful about it. We didn't have sex or anything, just touching and kissing. And I felt like I shouldn't have done it, but I couldn't help it.
Well, just the other night, I had a dream about her after all this time where she was touching me and I remember feeling extremely happy during the dream, but I woke up and panicked because I haven't felt like doing anything with a girl since that time and now suddenly, I'm thinking about her a lot and noticing girls in that way. I also haven't spoken to this girl in a very long time. We had a really bad falling out that had a lot to do with what we did and hid from our friends.
What I'm wondering is if this makes me bisexual or what? I mean, we both have boyfriends. She's still on my Facebook and it says she's in a relationship with some guy. But I'm still not sure. It's stressing me out big time.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
i understand.i am too a im 13 i have these dreams a lot but never say anything guys barely interest me its just part of who i am now
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You are what you are and you like what you like. Why try to put yourself in a category? Sexual identity is important and it's nice to be able to apply a defined orientation to yourself, but you really don't have to. Just relax and be who you are. Up until around your mid-20's, your brain is still developing so things can get a little wacky in there. Maybe in a few years everything will be clearer. While this is certainly a crazy time for you, what exactly is there to stress out about? Just live your life and the answers will come to you. It won't affect your life negatively if you don't have them yet. There's a huge push in recent years for people to categorize their sexuality. This causes so much confusion for so many people. There's nothing wrong with being unsure as to what category to place yourself in. Many, many people are. The question is, why does it matter?
Good luck! :)
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First of all relax. The dream you had is not your subconscious sending you a message. It is also not unusual to experiment with your sexuality when you are young. Both boys and girls ant some point during puberty will experiment with sex with another of their same sex. This is totally normal, it is part of exploring your sexuality.
Best their is nothing wrong with being gay or bi sexual. The thing is as far as being gay or lesbian this is not a choice you make for yourself. People whose sexuality are geared to gay and Lesbian were determined long before they were born, They could no more change their sexuality then you can change the color of your eyes. While some have tried to live the straight life they have ended up being miserable and eventually given in to their true sexuality.
No being bi is a choice and does not mean you are gay or lesbian or have latent tendency's towards them, It just means you enjoy both type of sex but are primarily heterosexual.
You don't say how old you are so it is hard to offer any type of advice. Instead of advice let me tell you a short story: In college I new a number of girls that one would swear were lesbians. IF you met them today you would never know that at one time their sex lives were almost entirely gay. Why was this. There were several reasons. First and foremost you cannot get pregnant from lesbian sex. You still get to relieve the sexual urges that add to the frustration of college life. It is definitely safer. Last but not least it was easier to find. Generally they shared their sex life with their roommate someone they most likely would not see again after college.
Now don't get me wrong not all girls practiced lesbian sex. Those that did, did so out of convenience and if the opportunity arouse to have sex with a guy some did.
If your still young and going through puberty don't get all stressed out over this or your dream. Your perfectly normal. Nothing says you have to act on your dream and what you and your girlfriend experimented with was also perfectly normal. Try making friends with her again as what happened between you is no reason to mess up a friendship.
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If your bisexual your bisexual, if your gay your gay, if your straight your straight. NEVER let your friends or society influence your sexuality, in our society - this day and age - nothing is "right" or "wrong". I believe maybe you did like her more than you even thought you did in the past but society saying "thats wrong" and your friends making you feel bad never allowed you to realize how much you could possibly like another girl, and that is why you had a dream about her most likely. Your dream was bringing out your repressed feelings about your past with her, what you wished happened with her at the time and you didn't realize it maybe even until now. Thats just an hypothesis though, who knows why you had a dream about her. To answer your question about you being bisexual... well I don't think you are because you having nothing but this to base it off of, theres nothing wrong with experimenting, maybe you should do something with a girl to see if you truly like it or not (not behind your boyfriends back though) i'd let him be there for it or at least ask for his permission...or if your bf gets as lucky as as i do with my gf youll let him join in too! (but that might throw things off if you truly like girls tho i dont know) Goodluck with everything. Remember theres nothing wrong with being bi! a lot of people are at least a little bi.
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