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Boyfriend refuses to wear a condom
I have been dating my boyfriend for over a year now and we havent been using a condom just the pull out method which I know isnt safe. I have tried birth control but it just makes me so sick I cant handle it. I asked him the other day if we could start using condoms because we have been going through some very rough patched in our relationship (he cheated) and I am trying to give him a chance to prove to me that he wont do it again but I DO NOT want to get pregnant right now we are not ready. So when I asked him to wear them he refused said that he will not wear them and its because he will not enjoy sex at all. He just said that I should go on birth control....he doesnt understand that I have tried too. He also got mad and said I guess we wont have sex then. I don't know if I should be upset or understand how he feels. Am I being selfish for thinking that he is not respecting me as his girlfriend? Please help!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Condoms?
So heres the deal, you need to tell this guy that you are a human aswell. You have feelings and he needs to respect that. So say hey would you mind wearing a condom? Also, tell him the complications if you had a child, and thats serious burden to carry. Set him straight and goodluck. :]
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So heres the deal, you need to tell this guy that you are a human aswell. You have feelings and he needs to respect that. So say hey would you mind wearing a condom? Also, tell him the complications if you had a child, and thats serious burden to carry. Set him straight and goodluck. :]
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Your boyfriend is not only being disrespectful, he is being selfish and playing Russian Roulette with your health. Condoms do not only protect you from pregnancy. They also protect you from many forms of STDS and the AIDS virus.
You know he has cheated on you and I'm sure he was not a virgin the first time you and he had sex together. Since he refuses to wear a condom with you, then you can assume he does not use them with anyone. That means every time you and he have sex you are having sex with all of his past partners and the partners they have had unprotected sex with. This is not safe for you or for him.
As for his pleasure with using a condom or lack there of. There are many different kinds of condoms on the market. It is just a matter of trial and error until he finds on that gives him the greatest pleasure.
What is of upper most importance is having safe sex. If he is so self-absorbed as to endanger your health and his by not practicing safe sex. Then my advice to you is not to have sex with him and to find someone who truly loves you and will practice safe sex with you until you are in a committed life long relationship.
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I really do think he's not respecting you. Sex is also a mind pleasure, not only physical. I think he is over-embellishing the fact that he won't enjoy sex AT ALL. There are so many men out there who wear condoms and have stable and strong relationships with their girlfriends. If he got mad at you and said he won't have sex with you makes it seem that he's not going to stick around if he can't have sex with "you." And considering he cheated on you, he should be trying his best to make it up to you. If birth control makes you sick and you have expressed that fact to him and he still insists on it, then I think you really need to re-think this relationship. Last thing you want is to have an unwanted pregnancy. I hope things work out for you. And I also don't mean to be negative.
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If he has cheated on you, you should be insisting on condoms regardless of whether you're on birth control or not. You don't know what he could have brought home, and some STIs take up to 3 months to show up in tests.
As far as I'm concerned, if you need him to wear a clown nose to feel safe and secure when having sex with him, he should wear the freaking clown nose. Call his bluff and respect yourself. Don't have sex unless he is wearing a condom.
I would also suggest that you talk to your doctor about alternative methods. There are lots of different ways to go about birth control.
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If you do not want to get pregnant then I highly advise you to seek another option for birth control.
There are IUD, Birth control shot, pills, rings. So many options.
I can almost promise you if you do not use more protection you WILL end up pregnant. Also, I would seriously think about birth control seeing considering he has already cheated once before...you can forgive but don't ever forget.
You have the right to protect yourself, also he is the one being selfish.
Well to just put it out there...why are you with this guy? He is being selfish and thick headed. Find someone who will value your feelings not guilt trip you into giving in. The hell with him
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