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I cheated on my boyfriend so i need to know if its possible that things go well
Do you think that if one part cheated,chances are there to get back together and be happy like before
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Well, although I doubt that things will be just like before, it doesn't mean that you can't get back together or that things can't be good again.
Some people will take a person back after they've cheated on them, but many times, the relationship takes a lot more work than it did before. There can be trust issues and it may take some effort on your part and his to get to where he can trust you again. You may have to spend some time proving to him that you won't do it again and he may have to spend some time letting go of the past and getting over the paranoia that you might do it again.
I know that your boyfriend is the one that matters to you, but you may also need to be ready for what you guys' friends and family will say. This isn't a situation where you can say, "Well, I don't care what anyone else thinks" because other people can influence your boyfriend's decision of whether to stay with you or not. Once, my sister's boyfriend he was mad at her because they were late to a party, so he grabbed my other sister and kissed her in front of the sister he was dating and all of their friends. The sister he kissed slapped the s*%# out of him and my dad wanted to kill him. After that, he expected their relationship to go back to normal, but the sister who was dating him didn't know what the right thing to do was, so when she heard what we had to say, she decided to break up with him.
You should also know that when the sister that got kissed had a boyfriend that cheated on her, my brothers, friends, and I all went looking for him to kick his a$$. I know that sounds so stupid, but that's what happened. He showed up and my house one night looking for her while she was out, but I slammed him against the wall outside and told him to stay away from her and never show up at my house again. May not have been the right thing to do, but I would not let him hurt my sister again and many other brothers, dads, and friends would do the same. With girls it's different. No one will use violence on you, but they may tell you to stay away or do something to make you stay away.
In the end, It's his decision and not his friends' or family's, but I'm just saying that you may want to focus on winning back everyone's trust back, so that they do not influence him to break up with you.
Good Luck!
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Yes, it is possible to recover from that. It is difficult, though, and it requires serious commitment on both sides. There are certain things which you will have to do, and which he will have to do, in order for you both to get past it.
Here's what you will need to do:
(1) Cut off contact with the person you cheated with. You can no longer have any sort of relationship, friends or otherwise, with that person. No phone calls, no E-mails, no texting, NOTHING. And that's how it has to be for as long as you have a relationship with your boyfriend.
(2) You must earn back your boyfriend's trust. That may take months. During that time, you give him no reason at all to mistrust you. Don't lie to him about ANYTHING, no matter how insignificant. Don't expect him to just believe you when you say something, and don't get upset when he asks for some proof that you're telling the truth about things. Don't do anything that you need to hide from him. When trust is broken, it needs to be rebuilt, and that requires hard work and sacrifice on your part.
(3) You must understand why you strayed. This may take time to sort out in your mind, but you need to find the real root cause, or it could happen again. Were you dissatisfied with your relationship? Were you looking for some adventure? Were you angry at your boyfriend and looking to hurt him? Did it just feel so good at the time, you couldn't summon the willpower to stop? Be brutally honest with yourself as you examine this question, because it must be answered for the sake of your own piece of mind.
(4) You must eventually forgive yourself. This is harder than it may seem, but if you don't, that self-blame will slowly poison your relationship and eventually destroy it. Not only that, but it will ruin your future relationships as well.
Here's what he will need to do:
(1) He must decide whether he will eventually be able to forgive you. The actual forgiveness will take time, but he needs to decide as soon as he can whether he thinks it will ever happen. If he still doesn't know whether he CAN forgive you after a month, then he likely can't. Please note that the actual forgiveness can take a lot longer.
(2) He needs to accept your sincere efforts to make amends. He needs to show trust in you again as you demonstrate that you are worthy of it. He needs to not use this incident as a weapon against you when you're dealing with unrelated issues.
(3) Eventually, he needs to forgive you unconditionally. If he cannot, then he needs to tell you so and end the relationship.
It is very, very hard for a couple to survive a major betrayal. I would suggest that it's only worth putting in the effort if you can see yourselves getting married someday. And no matter what happens, no matter how much time passes, the fact that it happened will always be there. The guilt you feel never really goes away entirely.
I know all of this because I had an emotional affair after ten years of marriage, and my wife and I DID get through it. It can be done. The relationship can even grow stronger, and you can be happier than you once were.
But it will never, ever be "like before". The wounds can heal, and the scars will fade, but they never go away completely.
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