I just saw your post. I hope you are still with us. I often feel the same way you do. I'm 25 now but when I was 16, I seriously considered checking out. I'm glad I didn't.I If I had I would have missed out on the experiences that have come since then. Not all of them great but experiences nonetheless.
I can't say I'm happy but really, who is? Truly? What does being happy even mean?
We all ask ourselves that. Know that you are not the only person out there not experiencing the world as "real" as it may seem to us that others feel it. But you can't give up. There's many more places to see. I often find being in nature helps, observing life calmly.
Life will never be perfect, and for some of us sorrow or hardship may follow us wherever we go. It's important to remember that when you choose suicide you give up all future experiences, not just the bad ones. You're robbing yourself of every sunny day, every smile and every laugh.
I don't know who you are responding to, but thank you. Even if that person doesn't read this, many others will, and if only one of those people changes their mind about self-harm because of it then you have done a world of good. If you haven't already, maybe you should start answering on this site! We can always use Advicenators who care like you do :) [ NinjaNeer's advice column | Ask NinjaNeer A Question ]
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