|
My boyfriend is SUPER controlling... what do I do?
I love my boyfriend to death and i know i want to be with him forever.Everything is perfect except he is super controlling.
-He hates my friends so i need to get rid of them
-His rule is i only get to hang out with friends once every 2 weeks.(Even though hes always hanging out with friends)
-I need to be texting him the whole time i am with friends
-I need to call him everynight
-I cant keep my nose piercing (i think i should have the right to decide what piercings or tatoos i get)
-He doesn't let me ever talk to any guys even just saying hi
-He thinks everything i wear is so slutty so i can hardly wear anything
I don't know what to do please help! I want to keep him he is so sweet and i know he loves me he is this way because of his past but he can't act like this i don't cheat or do anything wrong!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Hi,
You need to stop trying to justify him acting like this and overlooking the seriousness of it! He is abusively controlling. You talk about 'his rules' - your boyfriend is not supposed to be in charge of you and your life - you are supposed to be!! If you continue in this relationship the way it is the danger is you will just start to accept this as normal. You will end up with know one in your life apart from your boyfriend and he will run every aspect of your entire life - the really frightening thing is that this is probably the outcome your boyfriend would very much like. You need to get out of this situation now and the fact is he will not and can not change over night - please, please leave him and get out of this situation! You need to decided whats more important - your sanity, long term happyness, freedom, friends and family - or this one guy. Staying in this relationship will not end well for you!
You say he is the way he is because of his past. This may be true however you must not use this as a justification for his actions. If he is the way he is because of his past then its very clear he needs to come to terms with whatever happened and learn to move on BEFORE he is ready for a relationship.
I understand you love him and feel you can't live without him but I absolutely assure you that you can. Sometimes the right choice is a very hard one to make. I hope you can make it.
Take Care
Ashok
]
Dump him
1, He is controlling the shit out of you, He's manipulating you, He is ABUSING YOU mentally and emotionally.
Everything isn't perfect if he has this much power over you, He does NOT own you. You are NOT his property. Nobody should ever tell you who you can and can't be friends with. You are a human and you are entitled to have friends and hang out with them without your "boyfriend" breathing down your neck every damn second of the day. This is not love and this is not what a relationship is about. "He is this way because of his past" There is NO excuse for mentally abusing someone! I've had a very bad past does that mean I'm going to go and abuse my partner? No! The guy treats you like shit, You are not his dog. He does not throw a stick while you fetch for it. A relationship should be 50/50 there should be communication and RESPECT, TRUST and LOVE. There is none of that in what you've described. You are so blind sided, You do not see how this is wrong at all??... Reread these "rules" that he made for you. That is WRONG
A relationship is not about "rules" and it's not about keeping someone on a leach. I'm going to be blunt....Your boyfriend is a jerk and you should dump him and move on. You deserve much better then that flaming piece of shit.
]
You don't need to do anything at all and he can't make you because it's you life. Realize this...a friend will be your freind forever but he may not be your boyfriend forever. Your friends, trust me on this, care about you more than he does! Once every 2 weeks? For god sake, he's controlling your life. For all I care you should be able to see you friends once every 1 second! You also have the right to talk to other guys besides him don't let him stop you, that's not fair! You should also be able to wear anything you want who the hell cares. He shouldn't care what youwearif he loves you. Henshouldlet you do what younwant to do, if he really loves you. He's taking over your life...you don't deserve this at all and you kind find someone better who loves you and lets you do whatyou want! DUMP HIM! You deserve soooooooo much better!
]
More Questions: |