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Am I too young for love?
Okay, so im 14. And i started dateing a boy about a month ago. We are so close and we love eachother. But everyone keeps telling me that im too young and i dont know what love is yet. (Family members). I dont know weather i should trust them or not because ive never felt this way about a boy ever in my life. Am I too young for love?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Think about love like this.
When you're young and inexperienced, falling in love is like filling a cup with water. It doesn't take very long, but once it's full it's full. You feel like you're in love.
As you get older, the vessel gets bigger. You appreciate more about a person, get to know them on a deeper level. You are capable of understanding more about a person and about the world. So your cup is now a bucket.
This keeps going. You get older, the bucket becomes a bath tub, a pool, eventually something like a small ocean. As time goes on it takes more to fill the vessel, but the love means alot more to you.
The perspective your parents are talking about is comparing your cup or bucket to their small ocean. Compared to what they are capable of in the realms of love, no, you aren't really in love. But for you, you feel everything you can and are meant to at that age.
In a few years, what you feel now won't hold a candle to what you are capable of feeling then. But that doesn't mean that what you feel is somehow invalid. It's just not reached maximum depth yet.
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Well.. I was in the same spot that you are now. But what you have to remember is that only you can for sure decide if you love someone. It also matters on the reasons why you love him. Right now I totaly beleave that you love him.. but at this moment in your life there is "love" but it doesnt always mean that your "in love" with him. But hey only you can judge if you love someone and don't let others tell you if you do or not... your the only one that can really know if you love him, the real way you feel about this guy k :)
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Okay I'm a parent or actually a grandparent; here is what I think about being 14 and in love and what your family is telling you.
When I was your age my parents called this "puppy love" as it was or is a first love. It is the first time a girl or boy has feelings for someone of the opposite sex. So yes you can call it love and you can be in love.
Will it be your first and only love? Probably not. Teenagers today jump in and out of romances as fast as some people change their socks. This is why your family members are saying your not in love but maybe you are infatuated with the feeling or thought of being in love.
My feeling is when in doubt go with an old saying; "If it looks like a duck, Quacks like a duck, It probably is a duck." You are feeling the first pangs of a love interest. Call it love, call it Puppy Love or call it whatever you want. If it feels like love to you, then it probably is.
What your family members want to see this as; is up to them. What the should not do is ridicule you over this as they should stop and think about their first love and what it felt like. Not only that they should also think about how old they were when they had their first love.
The short answer to your question as to trust them or not: They are neither right or wrong in what they are saying to you. They are older and more experienced at this then you are. They therefor may see things or be more experienced at this then you are. So if you wish to trust them you may. It is your call.
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Hi,
Older people, especially parents, are always telling young people who claim to be in love that they are too young to be in love or understand what it is. I think this is an over simplistic, dismissive and patronising way of looking at it. While it is true that lots of people at 14 will talk about being in love when in fact they are not - I don't think that's because 'all 14 year olds are too young to be in love' its just because they haven't experienced it yet and therefor couldn't know what it really is to be in love. This does not mean that no 14 year old can be in love - there isn't an age were all of a sudden you get the capacity to be in love. It depends on you as a person and also when you meet the right person and develop a relationship with them. You know how you feel - don't let it upset or worry or anger you that some people wont accept you love this boy. If you love him and you know it and he knows it that's all that matters. And if as you get a bit older you come to realise it wasn't love then that's OK too, its all part of growing up.
Take care
Ashok x
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This is one of those questions that are subject to interpretation. In most cases, yes being 14 is too young to know what love is, but there will always be those exceptions to that rule whether people like to admit it or not. It's really impossible to tell now. The true test of love is time. If love between people can last through whatever time throws at them, then it probably is real love. Since it is a newer relationship, and you are still young, it would be hard to tell. I hope this helped and good luck with your relationship :)
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