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My Guy Friend
I am a female, 17 years old.
I have become pretty close to this guy and we've become really good friends. We talk on an instant messenger every night and share a locker at school. I feel like he's one of the only people I can fully trust and I really like talking to him. The only problem is we have never hung out outside of school although we've been close friends for about a year now. I do believe I am starting to gain feelings for him because I think about him all the time and I get butterflies every time before I go to our locker. My question is, I don't know if he feels the same. I know I should take the risk myself and ask him but I don't want to risk making anything weird or ruining what we already have. Another point, is I'm not really physically attracted to him, so is that a reason not to try and date him? And we're seniors and we're already 1/3 of the way through the school year, so if things got serious that could be really hard. I'm sorry if this is long, or a stupid question. But i'd like help. Thank you for your time <3
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Maybe give some free advice about: Work/School Relationships?
Tell him that you like him. There is something about high school that people overlook. Its only 4 years long. you are at least a third of the way through it. so tell him.
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There are a couple of issues here:
One is that once people graduate high school they tend to leave town or they change social groups. So at this juncture getting involved with him now might lead to disappointment relatively soon down the line unless he is going to stay in the area.
The other thing is that you aren't physically attracted to him even though you seem to be experiencing some of the symptoms of falling in love with him. I think you need to resolve that in your mind before moving forward with anything closer than a friendship. A relationship with a girl without sex just is not going to get it for most guys. It certainly wouldn't for me.
One other thing: it's not really a good idea to get tied down into relationships at your age. You need that exploratory phase of life where you date different people, build life experience and just give yourself time to grow up before you'll really know who you would really like to settle down with.
So if you just want to hang out with him outside of school and let it go at that then invite him out. However, when you take that step, he may interpret it as an interest in him being a sex partner of yours down the line, so you're going to have to know what your own intentions are before you ask him and you will have to be upfront on the limits of your relationship with him, if you decide there will be any.
Good luck and have fun!
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