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Getting back out there..
So I am a girl 18,
I am out of school and just sit around nowadays, well you see when I turned 15 I dated this guy T for a year I broke up with him on my 16th birthday and a few days after started dating my best friend S well, S and I dated for a year as well, I stayed single after he dumped me for a long time, hoping he'd get back with me, I realized I was an idiot haha, well after about 5 months of being single I met this guy M he was great, he was my dream guy, well I stayed single for about 2 more months until I was certain I wanted to date M, well M and I dated for about 3 months basically he had sex with me and dumped me the same day I found out he had been cheating, you know, your basic brand of Jerk. Well I've been single for two month now, and I realized the majority of my teenaged life I have been in relationships. After S and I broke up I started whoring around and didn't care much for relationships.
I knew M and I wouldn't get married or anything, but that brief amount of time I had with him reminded me how great relationships are. I know I am only 18, but, being alone sucks, I love being independent and doing things on my own, I am a strong girl, but sometimes I lay there at night all alone and wish that I had someone to cuddle up with. I'll go to my friends house and she lives with her boyfriend, these two are what you could call my only close friends. I love them but I feel alone a lot of the time when we go out, because well they are together and I am just there. I feel like I need to find someone to fill this void. I have tried other things, I paint all the time, I ref soccer, I rearrange my furniture and decor about 2 times a week. I go to the gym a lot and spend about 1/2 my day on youtube. I feel like my life is going nowhere. I do nothing, I have no car and my paychecks are really small. I really want to find someone, not a husband or potential husband, pffffft, I am too young! But I want to find a guy who will be a special friend, I don't want anything serious, but a guy to cuddle and kiss and talk to and do things with, but I look at the guys I know and most of them aren't my type or i have already given a go and didn't like. I am completely blind as to how to meet new people and I am very picky. I am just so tired of this feeling in my stomach, right now my only cuddle buddy is my stuffed rabbit. I feel like such a loser, so I guess my question is, how do I get rid of this feeling of being alone? I have tried taking up hobbies and joining social activities, but nothing gets rid of it.
I also want to know how to meet new people, I meet cute guys but I never feel like I am good enough, I know I am not ugly, but I don't feel gorgeous, I am tall about five foot eight and skinny, caucasian, green eyes, black hair. I look at guys but I can never talk to them unless they talk to me first, I mean, I'll see a guy while I am grocery shopping and give him some flirty eyes, but I can't go up and talk to them. :/ I don't know what to do, I am tired of being alone and feeling empty, what do I do? Any advice is greatly appreciated (: thanks!!
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
While sometimes it does suck to be alone, You also need to learn to be happy with yourself. Men don't make people happy, WE make ourselves happy.
If you want to find someone, Then you are going to have to put yourself out there. The next time you see someone in a grocery store grow some confidence and try talking to him. Start off with a simple "Hey, How ya doing and try complimenting" Smile and make eye contact. Guys find it sexy when a women has confidence in herself. Sometimes another good way to meet someone is through friends, If your friends know someone then make a day to all go out and hang out.
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Hello, I have to say that your story is a powerful story and what you are feeling now, I have felt that way too. You are so young and I think you should enjoy life because sometimes we worry about others so much that we forget who we are. Instead of trying to get a cuddle buddy, you should first love yourself. Try to analyze yourself and keep a journal of your goals and hopes to give a sense of what you want in life. Then, when you feel like you really love yourself then the guys are going to fight for you because men love women that love themselves. By loving yourself, I do not mean looking beautiful, but again knowing who you are and what you want to do in life.
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It's pretty wonderful to have someone to cuddle with and kiss with, that's for sure. But being alone is okay, too. You're doing some of the right things in having a job, going to the gym and refereeing soccer. Someone will surely take an interest in you. You just need to be patient.
The thing about being 18 is that after graduating high school everybody pretty much scatters to the four winds, which can make for feelings of isolation. I would seriously encourage you to look at community college, even if you're just going to take a couple of classes to get your feet wet. It would further expand your social circle, too, and you wouldn't feel like you're totally dying on the vine.
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