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My boyfriend, whom I wish to marry, has fertility problems, and has been hiding it... Can you tell me why?
i and my boy friend has dated for 3 and half years and nown we are planing to get married next year but my question is this... early last year i found out that he is having a problem with his sperm, the doctor said he dosent have sperm cell in his sperm. he hasent told me this for the first time even till this moment i found out when he disclosed his email password to me in his sent massage, he sent a prayer reqiuest conferming it (may be forgot to delet it). i really love him and would love to marry him he is may source of happiness i have waited all this years for him to tell me this but he havent why didnt he want to tell me? i want to ask him about it but how do i ask him? please some one should help me out. 22f
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first of all.. what I learned.. no one can make you happy.. they only walk with you to make it happy... so its fine I mean if you guys want to get married you guys can keep trying to have children there are so many different ways the doctors can try , but it will cost money.. if the worst comes to worst.. adopt if you want , so he didnt want to tell you because he was most likely afraid that you wont want to be with him anymore.. also because like the other person said he may be embarrassed and not know what to do... so what I would say is say it and mean it say that you seen the e-mail and you have nothing to be ashamed about that you are there for him 100% and ask him why he kept it from you and when you are talking tot him about this sit him down and focus on his eyes you will be able to tell and ask him calmy..
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Sometimes people are ashamed or embarrassed to talk about things. Also, It could bother him so much he just didn't want to talk about the situation or perhaps it is hard for him to except it.
It could be a number of reasons but I most certainly wouldn't hold it against him. It's almost like telling a women she is infertile. It can be depressing and a big ego killer to some guys just try and talk to him about it but be understanding.
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It's not exactly a topic that comes up easily in conversation. "Hi, my names John I like long walks on the beach, and I may not be able to how children! Now tell me about yourself! :)"
See what I mean? It's a difficult topic to bring up and he knows there's a chance you may want children and it's hard to bring up. Give him a break.
It's a life long decision that affects everything about your future so think long and hard about where you stand in your relationship now and remember no matter what you choose, you always have options.
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