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boyfriend trouble
my name is Rachel and Iam 21 will be 22 in another month and my boyfriend is 36 I know big age diffrence please don't lecture me. my boyfriend has major trust issues becouse of past relationships one put him in a wheel chair and paralized him for the rest of his life but let's get to my problem everytime I go out with friends or my sister he accuses me of cheationg on him and i've told him that iam not that type of person over and over again. I havn't done anything to break his trust at least not that iam aware of. How can I get him to believe and trust me?
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You can't, simply put. This, to me, is a big huge flailing waiving bright red flag! Specifically because I too dated an older man, with huge past trust issues (gf aborted kid) and problems with my going out. I've asked about a dozen questions on this very site on how I can fix this, and I can either redirect you to them, or I can just tell you this...he will never come around, no matter what you say or do, unless he wants and chooses to. Mine chose not to, so we are no longer together. If he doesn't it will never work. It was not a pleasant experience and I wish it on no one. Chances are, if he's that old, he's already made up his mind about women. He either likes them, or he doesn't. And dating a man that doesn't really like women is like trying to chip away at a concrete wall using your fingernails. Painful, tedious, and ultimately useless.
Now I don't mean to sound morbid, so I will say this. IF your boyfriend really has more of a self esteem issue than an issue with women, he may, in time, learn that you are genuine by your full and complete dedication. And if you're willing to dedicate your life in order to build up his, then you are truly a remarkable and rare person. Doing so wears most people down.
I hope this helps...
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Your boyfriend is the one with the problem, He doesn't trust you.
Guess what, Without trust your relationship will never work. Talk to him, It's not cool to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't trust you and makes accusations.
If he doesn't come around, I'd jet
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This is your boyfriend's problem, not yours. You are not doing anything wrong, so its up to him to change his ways, not you. You need to have the guts to explain that to him and let him know if he doesn't get over his jealous ways and give you the trust you've earned, you are out of there. If you don't have the courage, then you need to learn to accept that you are in a relationship with a jealous man-child and learn to live with it. I know what I'd do.
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well it seems like your boyfriend has self esteem issues and he thinks that just because he is in a wheelchair he has a disadvantage he feels that you would find somebody else because of his disability you need to speak to him and assure him that you love him and that just because he is paralysed it does not mean that he is any different to you, tell him that you love him for him and make it known that if you wanted to cheat on him you would have done it by now but he means a lot to you. communication is the only way you'll get through this because you too need your personal space and if he doesn't see reason then this would affect your relationship
best of luck
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