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my dad lost his job
im still in high school, a male, and recently my dad lost his job. He was getting paid really well and his company was paying him for 6 months, and now that 6 months is up and now he doesnt get paid anymore.
the thing is, hes working now, kinda, like he is working for an insurance company but he says he doesnt get paid and only get paid comission. lately i've been worried ass hell for him and our family. My mom still has her job and makes good money, but my dad is the one im worried about. i just dont understand it and why i have to worry about it. I mean, he is a smart guy, went to a good college, and got a degree in engeneering and have always managed to make it through. but lately i saw his mail and it says he hasnt been paying the mortgage on his condo lately and also that our car insurance has been cancelled.
all these things hasnt taken affect, at least i dont think so, but whenever i try to talk to my dad about it, he kinds ignores it and doesnt seem to care and just simply tells me not to worry. but i've been going crazy lately and i cant even think about anything else besides his money.
i dont get it, and what makes me more mad is that other people at my school are rich and have nothing to worry about, and they dont even deserve it. All they do is go to trash parties and get in their nice cars their parents bought for them, and im sitting here, not even thinking about going out with friends, but instead worrying about my dads money issue. I dont wanna be in a shithole or broke or anything, which we arent. I mean, out family has been pretty well of since like ever, but i dont know about now. My dad wont say anything about it and im really starting to worry.
Please help me, i dont know what to do, and i feel like i need to worry about it. Ive been crying and i just cant think of anything to think about or what to do.... please..
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First let me say I am extremely sorry for you. A while back my father got laid off from his well paying job. I know what a difficult time this must be for your family. The best thing I can tell you is your dad is probably feeling really worthless right now. He probably feel like he has been stripped of his pride. Which is why he never wants to talk about the bills.
My dad went into almost a deep depression. All you can do is be supportive of him, and encourage him to keep job hunting. When talking about money situations make sure you make it clear that it isn't necessarily your dads fault. Because I guarantee you he thinks it's his fault. And is feeling a lot of guilt.
And with the mail, that might not have been the smartest choice going through it but hey, you were worried. I understand you wanting to get to the bottom of it. Your dad sounds like a wonderful man, but like my dad he is probably sinking, fast. So pull him back up, be supportive, loving and do everything you can to help him along.
-hope this was helpful to you- Best of luck to you.
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DearAbby92 gave you some good advice. I doubt I could have set it any better.
The best thing you can do for your dad is to be supportive. By that I mean try not to add to his problems. If you need or want spending money to date, try and find a part-time after school job.
Working after school is actually a good thing to do for yourself as it is a resume builder. These kids you talk about whose parents hand them everything are going to be in big trouble when they finish College and look for a job. Employers look for a lot of things when they look at a resume. The first thing I look at is work experience.
What I'm looking for in the early, teenage years is not the job, but the work experience. This tells me a lot about who and what you are. Those that have after school jobs are the first ones I call for interviews. In today's economy and even before the recession an employer is looking for stability and a work ethic. Those kids will not have anything to show on their resumes and will find it harder to find a job.
Finding and after school job will help you now by putting some money in your pocket or if you want giving it to mom and dad to put towards the bills. I don't see dad taking it though. It helps you in your future job search and it takes some of the stress of your father. To me it is a win/win/win situation.
Now that you are 16 depending on where you live you should be able to get working papers and be able to apply for after school jobs. Just remember one thing; the job cannot get in the way of keeping up your grades.
As to dad not finding a job within his chosen career field. The job market for engineering is starting to turn around. Depending on what type of engineering dad does it should not be long before he finds a job he likes.
As for dads bills: First, you should not be looking through dads mail. From what you have written dad sounds like a smart man, I'm sure he knows what he is doing and how long he can put a bill off before he must pay it. It is unfortunately something one must do in times like this. It is not something for you to worry about.
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This recession has been hard on just about everyone, but its easy not to see its effects until it hits you or someone close to you.
Its sad that your dad lost his well paying job, but think about how lucky he is to have gotten another job. Even if it doesn't pay as well, its still a job.
He has a degree and work experience, it won't be too long before he works his way up or finds another position that pays better.
Trust your dad for now, I'm sure he has everything covered. It's okay if some bills slip through the cracks, he can recover later.
You can't change the attitudes of the spoiled kids at school, but you can change yours. Do you have a part time job? Maybe you could get one and try to contribute at home by buying groceries, supplies, or just needing less money from your parents.
Try not to worry, it sounds like you have more than what you need to get by and that your parents are responsible and can handle it. You will get through this.
Good luck,
-Abby
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