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Do i have anger issues???
Okay so today my mom and dad were going to buy me an i pod touch i have been waiting for about a year to find out i was going to even get it and yesterday they said i could get one but when we got to the store my dad said it was cheaper online and we could save $20 but i told him that i could pay $20 for it now but he said no and now i have to wait another week for it. so when i got home i made a scene about it i ran in my room slammed the door threw my shoes against the wall and cried for about half an hour but i wasn't just crying about the i pod other things have happened in the past 3 year my dad lost his job 3 years ago and still doesn't have one we are running out of money(that's why i couldn't get the i pod sooner but my conformation is coming up and they have money saved for me so they said i could get it) on valentines day the boy i like found out i liked him but he didn't like me that way(we are friends) and later found out that he has a secret girlfriend he told no one about and i just couldn't handle all my school pressure and i am the smartest kid in my family(i have 2 bothers and a sister)i used to get all a's but now i have b's and c's and my mom and dad are upset i can't keep up this image they want. so i had a complete melt down about this whole thing and i think i has something to do with anger issues because my older brother has anger issues so maybe i do too. i don't know but i need so help
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Hi, I'm one of the older advisers on this site; old enough to be your grandfather. Do you have anger issues? Hard to say from what you have written. Just because your brother does is not a reason that you too have anger issues.
What I believe is going on is more of frustration than anger. I'm sure with dad being out of work for so long the family dynamic has made a drastic change. As you point out it took mom and dad a year to save for your Ipod. When you went to the store and returned home without it, the frustration you have been carrying around finally broke through and the meltdown commenced. Frankly I'm surprised it didn't happen sooner.
As for your school work suffering. I can understand that with the family dynamic changing, the onset of puberty and the changes in your body along with the hormonal changes you are experiencing it is somewhat understandable that your school work would suffer as well.
As you did not include your parents reaction to your melt down I believe they were not that upset by what happened. Which tells me they understand your frustrations. They too are frustrated along with scared for what the future may hold that they cannot control or even foresee. Your dad being a good parent is also frustrated that he is unable to provide for his family the way he would like to.
Yes, we all have are frustrations; we all have are meltdowns. The question now becomes what to do about it. For you I would suggest you talk with your school guidance counselor. Tell him/her what is going on in your life and how you feel. He/she should be able to work with you to help you find ways to relieve the stress. He/she can also work with your teachers to get your grades back up.
The economy is getting better, there are more companies hiring and your dad will find a new job. When this happens the your family dynamic will change for the better and the stress you are feeling will start to lift.
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It sounds like what happened is you were really upset about not getting this ipod we all tend to get upset when we don't get what we want its a normal reaction I'm assuming that you most likely realized that it was kinda of stupid to act the way you did over this, and feeling dumb about a reaction like that is normal as well. We all have these natural emotional reactions to things, and its really hard to control these reactions and then when its all said and done we look back and say wow I can't believe I acted like that. So I wouldn't say you have angry issues you just over reacted a little it happens. As far as the other things go these things could very well be emotionally stressing you out, thinking about them while in your state of angry most likely made you more upset and I think you should find someone you can vent to or keep a journal that helps to. Also pay attention to the things that are in your control to change. Your father's situation is out of hands,the boy thing isn't really a big deal there's plenty of boys out there and plenty that will like you back. Now your grades b's and c's are still passing but I suggest you focus on those do what you can to motivate yourself to try harder in school once you get yourself back to A's it will be very awarding for you and would be a huge confident boost, This is something you diffidently can accomplish.
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