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I am really considering suicicide.
My head is toatally messed up and I am really considering suicicide. Being paranoid and not being able to engage in conversations with people has been the main to reasons for it. I went and seen a counsilor about a year ago for help and I had to just get up and walk out of the room because she laughed at me which really made me feel worse. I really don't want to be here and want to end this live, I hate living in fear and being so stupid, the only reson that I'm still here is because of my brothers and sisters and mother and father, I know it would kill them, but one day I don't think that will stop me and I will just be selfish and End this live that I'm meant to be living. Please help me if you can please. I'm male and 31 years old
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Suicide is never an answer or a solution. You need the right kind of help to fix what ever is wrong in your life.
You say "being paranoid and not being able to engage in conversations with people" is how you see yourself. Most people have a bit of paranoia in them and you appear to be somewhat introverted.
I consider myself to have raging paranoia even though I have expert medical opinion I am far from paranoid. What I have been dealing with is depression, with may be what you are suffering from Medication supervised by the right doctor and talk therapy with a good therapist have done wonders for me.
If as you are reading this you are feeling suicidal please pick up the phone and dial 911. Tell the call taken how you are feeling and ask for help. They will dispatch both the police and fire departments. The police are there to help not arrest you. They have to be there should the fire department find the doors locked and need to force their way into your home. The call taker will want to stay on the phone with you and ask you questions such as where in the house you are, if the doors are locked and so forth.
You can also go to the closest hospital emergency room to ask for help. If you are not actively suicidal at this time tell them you have been having suicidal thoughts or been planning to commit suicide. They will admit you to the ER and have a psychiatrist come to the ER to evaluate and treat you.
Please do not wait; either call 911 now or go to the hospital emergency room. There is help for you out there all you need to do is ask for it. Please don't judge yourself or the help out there by the counselor you first saw. There is better help to be had.
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Problems no matter how monumental they seem can be solved and usually fade from one's experience in time. Why kill yourself over something that will get resolved if you give it time?
What you NEED to do is go to any emergency room and tell them your life is miserable right now and that you are suicidal and need help. They'll find you a psychiatrist NOT a counselor trained to handle this type of crisis who can get you on medication and gradually back to enjoying life and resolving issues that have led to this.
Your problem is a mental health issue especially if paranoid on top and unable to function. That's why the counselor was an idiot because they weren't trained to handle what is a psychiatric issue. And believe me this is an emergency and needs to be seen in an emergency room by the on call psychiatrists pronto.
Life's worth living, all issues can be solved no matter how big so dying over them is stupid. You don't really want to die or you wouldn't have reached out to us anyway.
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