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I want to marry my American boyfriend.
And before I start, I don't want any negative judgements for my decision.
19/female from Australia. Been dating my online boyfriend for 9 months, he's American. He's coming here in Feb 2011 for 5 weeks. Since the distance has had its toll on us already we both decided we don't want to be apart again. He says when he gets here we'll get married and I'll go back with him to the U.S, but me being someone who likes to go by most rules, I don't want to screw around with the system. I don't want to marry him and find out It was illegal for us to do so and then ruin my chance at being with him. I want to do this right way.
I've looked on the USCIS site at different visas, and I'm not sure which one I qualify for, the fiance one would be nice, but I don't know/think I could apply for that since this will be the first time meeting physically and only known each other for 9 months. We haven't decided yet where we want to live, but he said he can definitely take care of me in the U.S and to be honest, it would be great to get away from Australia for a while, and my family. I love this man. I know that, I don't need anyone telling me I'm too young, I'm old enough to decide who I want to be with and where I want to go in life and Dad knows I've always wanted to travel, but once he finds out my plan he will try to stop me since he's the type of guy who likes to have power, but I'm not letting him shield me from the world.
So what I need to know is how to exactly do this. Not so much easy way because there's no such thing but the EASIEST way is what I'm looking for. Also, does him being in the Marines for 5 years then the U.S Army for the past 3 years count for anything at all? Will it make a difference? And is there ANY possibility that we won't have to be apart again for more than like 1 month? at most 2...
I would greatly appreciate if someone could help me out without making harsh judgement...
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Hey,
How about you meet him first, then apply to college in the U.S. in the area he lives, that way you can get a student visa and have permission to stay in the country till your studies are over. By that time, you would have gotten used to his physical presence, etc. etc. and the marriage thing is quite complicated - there will be a "test". Watch "Green Card", the movie. It may help answer some things. Best of luck, 19/f!
K
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Before you even look into moving, just see how it goes meeting him in person. It's different knowing someone online and knowing someone in person. The idea seems magical, to marry a man you've loved but never met, but you have to be utterly realistic. He may not be exactly how you envisioned, he may have different habbits or some personality traits that you've never noticed.
And with the marriage, should it be so quick? I say go for it for moving there, for doing whatever you feel like because you're so young and the world is your oyster, but once you're married that's it. I don't think you're too young to be in love, to move overseas or to get married, but I do think you just need to take it all one step at a time.
My advice is to just 'go with the flow' and take baby steps. Meet him, get to know him, spend time with him. And if, after 5 weeks, you feel just as strongly or even stronger, THEN look into moving to America. Would you rather find out how to move there now and get everything prepared, or wait a few months just to make sure it's absolutely what you want to do? A few months just to be certain.
Honestly, I see nothing wrong with people finding love online. I respect people that have met their partners online and are proud to say it. But it HAS to be sad: be careful. You will never know if what he has told you is true. I know you'll resent that, but you need to hear it even if you already know it.
From what I gather, you just need your visa and passport to go to America. Then while there, you apply for the citizenship test, study hard, and pass it. I would think that if you married him in America they would be unable to deport you, but I'm not sure. I would suggest calling the department of imigration and citizenship and see if they have any information OR if they are able to direct you/give you a contact number for someone that will. I'm not sure if America has their own government based website with contact information for migrants.
Goodluck with your relationship and moving overseas, I really do hope it all turns out wonderfully.
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Hey,
The best advice i can give you, is from my own life, and that's moving to America. If you want to go live with your fiance then I would make a move to America and work on getting a green card so you can live here permanently, and then have the option of having a US and Australian passport. Getting a green card IS difficult, it just takes time, but if you're planning on staying, it would be work getting so you can be a permanent resident, since there is a maximum number of years you can be in the US legally from Australia (or any country).
I would definitely talk to the district you wanted to move too, i would start with the town hall, and work on what you need to do to gain residence, and get things such as a driver's license and insurance over here.
Sorry i couldn't help more!
-Sophie
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