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I'm not happy with my life :( What do I do to fix it?
I'm not going into detail because I would end up writing over 10000 words. Short story.. I really dislike my life. A lot is going on and i cry myself to sleep almost every night because i don't like my life right now. I'm a senior in high school and a girl. People are usually stressed about college and where they want to go etc. but I have that figured out. SO i guess thats alright since i already know my future. I'm just not happy...
I have a boyfriend. BEen going out for a few months and he's great. sometimes he gets on my nerves and irritates me and we have some fights. but other times he's there for me and he's the best boyfriend i've had. he really cares about me and whenever i'm in a bad mood he knows how to cheer me up. i dont get to seem him often outside of school because i'm involved with other activities and so is he. my bff is irritating me. lately we havent been on the same page and been fighting a lot about random crap. parents are getting more annoying. i'm 18 so i am pretty sure i have some freedom and independence but according to them i dont because i still live under their roof :( a lot of people i know get to do things like drive downtown and go to parties and hang out at peoples houses until midnight but my curfew is still at 9pm or even 8. they wont let me do certain things like go to a friends house they dont know. or sleepovers. or go to a concert. or go to a friends cabin. or drive outside of my town.. pretty much no life and living in a bubble.. to make things worse, i dont really have many friends. i mean, i have friends but they're the people who i say "hey whats up" to in the hallways and then dont talk much outside of school.
i just dont know what to do anymore. i really dont like my life and no matter what i do to change it.. i end up making things worse. i guess all im asking for is some advice on how to be happier and cheer me up? i dont have much time for myself so my options are limited. dont have a job which equals no money. parents keep me in a bubble life. i feel like i'm suffocating and just hate my life right now. please help.
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So I am going thorugh a similar situation and I think your parents are just protected of you trust me , it happens and maybe if you I dont know how you act towards your parents , but if you act badly? thats why they proabably aren't letting you out or if your constantly making remarks of not being able to go out and stuff , because parents get more frustrated and dont let you do more , as it seems. I know i dont have many friends either and its okay AS long as you have ONE good friends girl that's all you need trust me , if youd ont have that ONE good friend then im sure soonr or later you will find him/heran dhave a great time , and for the job? why dont you go out and make a resume , dont sit there and say oh man i have no job.. no money.. no thing , well i suggest you get upa nd make a resume if youd ont already and go and pass it around and you'd be surprised you'd get phone calls back im sure you could get one ,and i know it migh tbe like your sufficating and it's not fair their justoverprotected of youa nd they dont want to lose you or anything bad to happen , and you know wat? if you and your boyfriend keep this up dont worry , im sure it can work just try to make time for eachother talk on the phone or call or stuff , and im sure because your 18 , theyknow you hit that stage a long time ago and their scared if you go out you'll just go lunatic , you never know , but don tbe offended by this , it just a matter of time , just a stage , soon enough you'll be out of the bubble life , just focus on whats most important now , do things you love to do
good luck!
- dont sufficate , just go out and do stuff!!
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Well, my parents are the same way and although it's annoying, I don't fault them for being protective over me. I agree that when you live in their house you should abide by their rules.
If you want a little more freedom, you should offer information on where you'll be, who will be there and what you'll be doing. They feel responsible for your well-being, so it's important that they are very informed about your life.
You can also try inviting a few friends to your house, so that your parents can decide if they are good influences. If they are, your parents should feel at ease letting you go to events with them.
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Im old enough to be your grandfather and this question screams for a little grandfatherly advise.
So your parents gave you the "while you live under my roof you live by my rules routine." I've heard it before; many many parents use this rule to try and rein in or smother their almost, or adult children. Is it fair, no.
What can you do about it. A good response to this rule when said to you would be: How am I ever going to learn to live on my own if you don't allow me the freedom to venture out in the world while you are close at hand to guide me and help me keep from making mistakes. Keeping me in a glass bubble may keep me safe but it is not preparing me for a future on my own. Is that not a part of a parents responsibility as well, to prepare a child to be a responsible adult and make their own way in the world. You should of course put this in your own words and not say this in anger or in a situation of combativeness.
You could put this in a note that starts out with something like; I am feeling smothered and depressed. While I realise you are only trying to keep me safe.....
I have mixed feelings about a curfew. If you are someone that has a problem managing time then a curfew on school nights is probably not a bad idea. The 8 or 9 pm curfew is way to early for someone your age though and should be rolled back to around 10pm. No curfew should be in place on weekends, though returning home at a reasonable hour is respectful on your part towards your parents. This time would vary based on your activity for the evening(s).
Is there a close member of the family or a friend of your parents who might be able to talk to your parents on your behalf? If so consider talking with them and asking them to do so. Your parents are good people trying to raise you in the only manner they know. Probably in the manner they themselves were raise and they turned out okay.
I know it is hard on you; you're 18, legally an adult forced to live under rules you consider childish. If it helps you are not alone in this predicament. The my roof, my rules saying is used by more parents than you would ever think. The biggest problem with this rule is a child will eventually live under another roof as will you when you go off to college.
Does this rule allow you or any other child living under this rule to learn the coping skills required to live out from under their roof. I do not believe it does. This is what you have to find away to present to your parents.
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Well to start off your parents keep you curfewed because your growing up and honestly there scared to let you go.Its not fair and its not right,but right befor I turned 18 my dad started craking down on me and setting weird rules that i hadnt had for quite some time.So it comes down to they just havnt accepted that your growing up and very soon you wont need them as much.Its hard to make them understand how you feel at this point.Hopfully your going to a college away from there or you will never get away.Are your parents not letting you have a job?because if thats it you need to try and talk to them about it.Instead of telling them you feel like your in a bubble tell them you think you need one because you need to learn more responsiblity.It should work tell them you just want it for extra money in college so you will have every thing you need.When there as controlling as they are its hard to find ways to do the things you want like party and socialize.Find a friend they know,or make on that is really good with parents that way she can be your aliby if you ever do want to get away.Other than that my best advice is dont be so focused on the negative right now,because soon you will be out in the world away from there controlling hands and able to live how you want.Just be carfull the world seems nice and easy but it really isnt.As for your best friend i know me and my bff are like a married cupple we fight alot but its like one min were arguing over somthing stupid and then all of a sudden were just laughing our butts off.If you guys arnt going to the same college or maybe you guys just feel like your about to be torn apart that could be what the minor irritating arguments are coming from.Just talk to her tell her how your feeling tell her you need her.If shes a good friend she will be there for you.
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