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should i transfer?
i currently live 3 hrs away from home where my boyfriend lives, attending college while he finishes his 2 years up at the community one at home.
next year hes thinking about transfering to a college where he can play football which is 1 hr away from our home, but 3 and a half hrs away from where im going to college now. Weve been together for 9months.. and our relationship is really good.
im scared to make the wrong decision giving up my life here and moving to where hes going but i dont wnana do long distance any longer like i would do it if we had to but i want our realtionship to grow.. i made a lot of friends here, and im sure i would make some at another college cause im a very outgoing person, but i never wanna base my decision around a guy, yet im the type of person who is a very good girlfriend and i dont really go out so my life here is kind of boring, and he doesnt drink or go out at all.
Just need some advice, idk.
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I wouldn't transfer if I were you.. here's why.
1. You already have a good setup, friends, and you are comfortable in your surroundings. This is important because let's face it... college is hard. You need to be in an ideal setup just to get through it.
2. I'm glad you said you wont make a choice based around a dude.. here's why...
Absence really does make the heart grow fonder. You will see him less which means you will have more time to concentrate on your studies and when you do get to see him, you two will be happy to spend any amount of time with each other it is more sacred and fights are less. This means you will also be more communicative. As emails, texts and IM's will be more important between the two of you.
Here's the truth. If it's meant to be, it'll happen no matter what. I'm sure you are tired of hearing that. But you don't want to screw with your future just because it's going well. I actually threw away a good shot at a good school over a chick once. Seemed like the right thing to do at the time. I wonder what would have happened if I hadn't.
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I would say to wait it out for at least another year.
9 months is still pretty early in a relationship, especially when most of it has been long distance. Now, I'm not going to tell you that it's impossible to be sure about someone at this point in time, because I was engaged at 10 months (still am, 3 years later... LOL)
However, it's a huge decision to make. You want to be absolutely certain that things are going to work out between you two before you go upturning your entire life.
That doesn't mean you can't start looking into it. Check into programs at the other school. See what credits would transfer. Check to make sure that it makes sense academically for you to switch.
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It's an old saying... "Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it enkindles the great, and extinguishes the small."
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