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How do you tell a guy you want to be his girlfriend?

Question Posted Thursday October 21 2010, 7:47 pm

I've been going out with this guy for 4 weeks now but we haven't made the step forward to call each other boyfriend and girlfriend. How do I tell him that I want to be his girlfriend and his only one? I know he isn't seeing anyone else right now either but I'm really into him and I am getting the feeling that he's into me, too. I'd like to go on and start the relationship. How do I tell him without coming across as demanding and pushy? We go out 2 or 3 times a week and talk on the phone a lot so I have plenty opportunity, but I just need to find the right words.

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TimothyDanger answered Friday October 22 2010, 6:43 pm:
How about...
"hey 'name of mutual friend' asked me if you and I were like an exclusive thing. Weird huh? I didn't really know how to answer her. I told her I was really having fun hanging out... Has anyone asked you something like that?"

That may open up dialog, you can use a kill shot to seal the deal along the lines of... "the truth is, I like the time we've been spending. I appreciate the way you have been fitting in to the rest of the things I have going on, I would like to keep doing what we do, in an exclusive way if you would too."

Then he can respond. You have to be ready for whatever comes. He may not want a relationship. In which you can tell him you are fine with how you have been continuing. (or maybe your not and you want the title)

Whatever you do make sure he's not on a rebound. Those never end well and you may just want to keep on seeing him without the title until he gets it together.

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DearAbby92 answered Thursday October 21 2010, 9:59 pm:
The best thing to do is talk to him in person about it. Wait for a quiet moment where you can really talk to him and ask him where he thinks you two are going. If he wants a relationship then he'll ask you to be his girlfriend. He's probably wondering the same thing as you and might just be too shy to ask you or doesn't want to rush into it.

He may also not want a relationship right now, so don't be shocked if he says he just wants to keep things casual. However it is your decision if you are okay with just hooking up without the title or if you need to be in a relationship. Usually 'friends with benefits' or hook ups get messy, so be careful.

Good luck,


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dearcandore answered Thursday October 21 2010, 8:48 pm:
Next time you're together, in between the appetizers and the main course, casually say " I've just been this a boyfriend/girlfriend thing, or are we supposed to see other people? Because I would like us to be boyfriend and girlfriend. What do you think?" Short and sweet, like ripping off a band-aid. Good luck.

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