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no pleasure from sex
I recently lost my virginity in September. I expected the first time to be painful but the next three times were also painful, but the initial pain went away after a minute. I understand this could be because the times I have sex are usually spaced out by a week or two. The problem is, I don't get much enjoyment out of sex. I have feeling, but it just feels more like pressure than pleasure. Other activities give me more pleasure than sex, such as oral sex.
I don't know if this could be related but about a week and a half after having sex I got a yeast infection and then after the second time for having sex I seemed to get another infection of some sort. I'm not at risk for any STD's because we were both virgins and we always use condoms.
I'm really not sure what to do or if theres anything I can do. I feel like sex should be more pleasurable and not cause me so much trouble. If anyone has advice or can relate I'd appreciate it.
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Your first couple times can be awkward and your mind focuses on so many things, not just the act of having sex. So because of this, you might not find much enjoyment from sex right away. Other factors that might add to this is the condoms you are using. You may be allergic to latex in the condoms which can cause irritation and itchiness that could be mistaken for a yeast infection. Condoms are also known for desensitizing female satisfaction during sex. The position you were in may also play a huge factor in enjoying sex better. Here are some ideas that might help you enjoy sex a lot more in the future.
You mentioned you enjoyed oral sex a lot better than sex. Well most woman cannot fully enjoy sex without stimulation to their clitoris, not just through penetration (which is why you enjoy oral sex more). Try to do positions that allow for easier access of your clit and allow for intercourse at the same time. Missionary (man on top, woman on bottom)is not a good position because entry is very shallow, and woman get the best pleasure with deeper penetration. If you lay on your side and he lays behind you, he can enter deeper and stimulate your clit with his hand at the same time. You can also switch from this position to being on your hands and knees with him behind you on his knees and his hands on your hips. You can alter this position by arching your back and also by going from your hands down to your elbows. This will allow even deeper entry so if it is too deep before, stay on your hands and knees and do not change to this version. Now for condoms, I suggest using an ultra thin condom that does NOT have any lubricant. The lubricants on most condoms can increase you likely hood of getting infections, especially if you are allergic to latex. The thinner the condom, the less desensitized you are during sex, and the more you both will enjoy it. This also means it has a better chance to break though. So in order to prevent breaking the condom, make sure to buy a bottle of lube, I would try using KY brand for Female Satisfaction. You can get them at any local drugstore in the condoms aisle.
I hope this helped and if you have any more questions, feel free to message me.
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It's only been a couple of weeks...I'm pretty sure you're not totally comfortable. Stress, insecurity, all of that plays part in sex. If you're thinking too much, if you're worrying about stuff too much.
I'm assuming you're fairly young? You don't even probably know yourself yet...and you're trying to now allow someone else to know you lol. It's a learning experience for both of you, relax...smoke a joint.
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I heard that after sex you should pee because otherwise you could get a yeast infection or urine infection. I dont know how accurate this is but it doesnt hurt to try.
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