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Stingy With My Best Friend??
Okay so me and my bestfriend are getting closer then ever. We txt each other all day,we call and gossip like teenage girls do and we juss laugh at juss about everything. We are sooooo much alike its scary. But the thing is, we are a trio with this other gurl but i dont like her. Okay,me and her have been friends in the past but its like we share the same best friend and i absolutely hate it. I mean i juss dont like her. She so whiney and baby-ish. She's just not the type of person i would like to hang with. I know that my bestfriend can be friends with whom ever she wants but how do I tell her i dont wanna hang with this third person. I hate when she invites her out with us when we go to the movies,restuarants,ect. And lately my bestfriend has mentioned us living together at the beginning of next year.....ALL THREE OF US. I dont want to but i juss dont know how to tell her that im stingy with her and i dont want to have to hang with other people that she's cool with. What to do????!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
It's a fact of life that certain people do not get along with or like certain kinds of people. All you need to say to your best-friend is that you love being with her but feel very uncomfortable with her other friend as you are polar opposites and don't get along with her.
If said friend is invited somewhere along with you be cordial as it's your friend who did the inviting likewise she'd do that for you. I doubt your friend would drop you in favor of her other friend but if you don't want to risk it happening perhaps don't say anything. Just be cordial and go with the flow when she's around. You don't have to be buddy, buddy or anything other than tolerate her for a bit.
That may be your best bet just go along and be nice to her when she's there and have nothing to do with her apart from that.
If this person is overly-clingy, whiney etc. etc. maybe there's a greater reason. It could be mental health related, learning disability, or never being taught adequate social skills to begin with or really yearns to be liked but goes at it the wrong way. Don't judge.
I believe you know this person for a reason and your other friend is bringing her along for a reason. Why? She probably knows her friend can be a pain in the ass but knows that you won't cause waves with her and or become a friend.
On the flip side it may teach you a lot about yourself and being patient and tolerant with people who are very different from you. There's good to be taken from this.
You don't have to like the girl but be civil towards her when she's around. Your friend sees something special in each of you knuckleheads to keep you both around and nobody's stealing your thunder or pal. This is probably just a new thing and once they've been friends for a while they won't be around 24/7.
As for living together I wouldn't worry about something that is quite a ways off yet. It's all talk and fantasy thus far of what your friend thinks life might be like. Trust me, you might not know this girl long or end up in different cities or schools for that matter. Deal with today and don't worry over that.
Nobody can make you hang out with anyone else but if you play that card with your friend and tell her who you will/won't hang with or turn down the girl and her friends often enough you shoot yourself in the foot and wind up lonely. If you don't want to hang with them use an excuse.
I have a feeling this girl really needs solid friends and someone to set her straight in a gentle way of course that she annoys people without trying because of her bad social skills that make her seem younger and less mature than her peers.
If you both taught her to recognize the problem and correct it who is to say the kind of person she could be become to a lot of people much less yourself. Maybe that's what she's in your life for. Maybe you can do her a favor.
You once were friends. What happened? Use that past friendship as an example and try to help her as you may find you'll like her more than you thought. Obviously, your friend has found something in her despite all the stuff you hate about the girl to be her friend.
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You don't have to hang out with this other friend if you don't want to.
You need to tell your best friend flat out that you like spending time with her, but not this other girl. She'll understand if you're nice about it and don't badmouth the girl you don't like.
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