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Socially retarded....
Hi! I'm 23 and I don't have any friends right now that are close to me. I don't make friends easily anymore and I'm getting lonely. It's so hard to find a good friend these days, people keep stepping all over me. How do I go about making new friends without looking stupid?!
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Dearest Socially retarded....,
Being socially retarded is not exaclty the words I would use to describe my husband, but if I had not talked to him first, we would have never talked.
I think you have asked a very important question here. How do you go about making friends without looking stupid?
First, I can tell you from experience, you will often meet a true friend in a moment of acting or looking stupid. It is usually what draws someone who is similar to you into your energy field.
The surest way to go about making new friends is to learn about what kind of friend you are compatible with. You should look into why it is so hard for you to make friends. Once you recognize why you are socially retarded, then you can determine what kinds of places, events, and other social meeting places to visit.
Ask yourself what kind of person you are. Your habits, quirks, beliefs, etc need to be identified. I say this because my husband is the most socially awkward person I know, and it is because of his Autism. It was not until we discovered his syndrome, and learned how to deal with it that he was able to become less socially 'retarded' with people. He actually has one very close friend, and a few others he is starting to call friends. So it may something simple like identifying why you are they way you are, and then finding someone who is compatible with that.
It is the advice of this Doktor that you start with searches on-line for special quirks you have. For instance, my husband cannot keep track of anything he uses, and often spins in circles looking for something that is in his hand. To most this looks 'stupid', but to those who know he has Autism, it is nothing. Sometimes he says things in sincere concern, but his tone comes across as pampas and rude. The worst part is that he does not realize he is talking like that. It does not occur to him that he may sound rude.
The internet is a wealth of information at your fingertips, take advantage of it while it exists.
I hope that my advice has helped you and please contact me anytime for anything. I am here to help you. Good Luck!
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You are at a great age to make friends, right now you are just starting to find what you are interested in and are much more mature.
It all depends on what you are interested in. Try joining classes, like ballroom or a spanish course, and you could gradually create a bond through that.
If you have a job, check out your new co-workers. Anyone seem interesting? If you're into music, ask someone from your work place if they'd like to join you. Just getting yourself out there is all you have to do.
Or join a website like hotornot.com. It's a great way to make new friends!
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