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A Few Questions About Sex
17/F
I have been officially dating my boyfriend for about 14 months, and we kind of saw eachother for a month before that.
Lately, things have heated up alot and I can't help but think about sex. The thing is, my mother is extremely religious and for my entire life has talked to me about how having sex will do nothing but ruin my life.
I am not planning to have sex anytime soon, just maybe within the next year or two, but I would like a few opinions first.
I really do love my boyfriend, as stereotypical as that sounds and I am more than ok with him being my first. Do you believe that a year or two of dating makes it a bit more liable? I just dont want to end up being considered a horrible person if I do have sex with him before marraige. He has had sex once before, but has been amazing to me and is perfectly fine with waiting however long I want to, it has never been an issue.
Also, my parents always tell me that anyone they know that has been on birth control has ended up having problems with getting pregnant later. I have tried researching this, but many websites have different ideas on the matter. I was wondering if anyone knew for sure if this would be a huge issue. When I do have sex, whenever it is, I want to be able to use birth control pills, condoms and spermicide, just to be extra safe.
However, once again, I have alwasy been taught sex before marraige is one of the greatest sins that can be committed. I dont really believe that, but it does bother me. If anyone has their own viewpoints on this, it would be great to hear.
Anyways, thank you alot for taking the time to read and hopefully answer this. :)
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I've never heard of birth control causing pregnancy problems later in life
and i don't want you to think im a slut or anything but I lost my virginity at 14 after about 3-4 months. I feel happy for you that your boyfriend isn't pressuring you because mine did and I do regret it :(
Wait as long as you feel ready to, theres no age limit to sharing something special with the one you love. good luck x
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Some of my "christian" friends hate me for my saying "I'm not going to be in pain on my wedding night, I'm going to have the best sex of my life on my wedding night!"
Plain and simple. :)
Now, I'm not saying that waiting until marriage is a bad thing, it's just not for me.
Good luck, be safe, be smart!
And even if your mom is religious, tell her you want on birth control because you'll be heading off to college soon and can't take the chance of getting pregnant. You never know what will happen... you could get really drunk one night, have sex with some guy who didn't wear the condom...now you don't have anything protecting you from getting pregnant.
That's the same reason why I got on birth control. And I'm glad I did. Even after I was put on birth control, I waited atleast a year and a half, almost two years to finally lose my virginity.
& make sure you lose it to someone special. :) Good luck!
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You are not a horrible person and even if you two decided to have sex now it still doesn't make you a horrible person.
I give you the hands up for waiting 14 months, Not many folks even wait a month these days. That alone means you hold your head high and you aren't one of the dumb ones. On the other plus side, You are 17 years old and that is another thing I applaud you for. A year from now doesn't make having sex any more right or wrong then if you two were to have sex now the only thing that makes a difference is you waited a little bit longer. The only thing I will tell you is you should use protection, Yes the truth is birth control can cause some woman to have complications with pregnancy but the chances of that happening are down right slim. It is just one of those things the gynecologist will tell you just like doctors would tell their patients what the possible side effects are for taking prescription medications. There is always a possibility but I will tell you from experience I had the Mirena IUD inserted in 2007 and had it removed earlier this year and I never ever had an issue with pregnancy as I sit here now 3 months along expecting my first child as I mind as well add that I was also on the Depo Provera shot and that also didn't cause me no harm in conceiving. Lets look at the truth, Most religious people are against sex before marriage and some will even tell you anything to prevent you from having sex until then. If you were to have sex with your boyfriend of 14 months NO, That does not mean you will go to hell. NO, That does not make you a terrible person. You waited over a year and you also waited until the age of 17 give yourself that much respect.
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