|
boyfriend.. please help
Heyy guys, I have been with my wonderful boyfriend for three and a half years.. hes great, i cant see me with any other guy, when it comes to being married that is. He is what every girl wants, a sweetheart, nice, caring, everything! But since June we havent been the best.. let me start from the start..
We started dating when I was 15 and he was 17. I never thought it would last as long as it has, the years just flew by. Hes everything I know and ever wanted. I graduated high school in 2009, and this past summer we broke up, got back together,broke up and i dated another guy and we are now back together.
But lately I have been feeling that I was never a teenager, and I missed out on what a normal teenager girl goes through.
Im so confused its unbelievable. I tried talking to him tonight about, and he understands what Im saying, but he says "just live for right now and not worry about the future" but the problem is idk what i want right now. I want to be a normal 18 year old girl.. Going out with her friends, talking to other guys, flirt a little, but at the same time i know when it comes to being married, hes the right guy. I told him I dont want to take a break bc im feeling like this bc im worried he wont be here again.. I told him I wish we didnt find each other soo young..
idk what to do? should we take a break? stay together? im really confused, has anyone had a similar position like this?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You're 18 years old you shouldn't be thinking about marriage...you should listen to yourself. Right now you shouldn't think about settling down but about your career the college your going to attend. The norm is that around 18 and up you have find your "husband" and then start having kids. Maybe you should go with that feeling maybe you should be single and live a little bit. By the time you turn 21 you're going to want to go to the club...but if you're in a relationship you feel a bit mroe guilty for going. I know you care about him but you need to care more for yourself and what you want. Marriage comes later in life and if its meant to be its meant to be. There could be a better guy out there that you may marry or there he could be the one. For right nwo you don't knwo what the future will hold thats why you need to live in the moment and starting being 18 again. I think about marriage but I know right now I need to just relax and have fun...I'm back with one of my ex-boyfriends right now...I don't know if he's the one...but I'm having fun...I'm only young once so I figure why not have as much fun as possible. Later on in life I need to grow up and decide when I get to my late 20s then I'll start thinking of settling down. Right now it sounds like you want to explore...so go ahead and if its meant to be with this guy it will happen...but right now is not the time to be playing house...my regret when I was 18 was I spent too much time with a guy then having fun with my friends. Do what's right for YOU! :)
]
Yup similar position, and been there and done that, it is completely normal to feel this way, and by the way its just a phase and you'll forget all about it, everyone committed to someone, and in a relationship feels that way at one point of the relationship ,and it sometimes usually causes problems, but you shouldn't let it get to you, you should be proud and happy that you are mature and that you are different from the other girls and that you are committed and have a long time relationship and you have the guy that you've always wanted and the guy of your dreams and he's practically perfect, and the thing is, don't cause problems when there are no problems , you know, don't create problems, cause once you lose him, you'll feel so bad in a way that i can't describe, just losing him and being alone, and all those memories and things you had together and they way he was with you and so caring and stuff. And there is nothing called 'taking a break' in a relationship, i don't believe in that, i know its possible and many people do it, but it always causes problems and affects the relationship one way or another.
And hey, do you think he's not missing out on things he likes to do while being with you, do you think he doesn't sometimes miss being single and flirting with girls and being free to do what he wants and hanging out with the guys like he used to, he's a guy for heaven's sake, and guys usually have a wilder single life than girls, but he's okay with missing out on that, cause he likes you and loves you and cherishes you and sacrifices that to be with you, so you should do the same, and i'm not telling you that your wrong for thinking that way, you will probably have to think that way every once in a while, but don't let it get to you, try to see the advantages and the bright side and the love that you are living right now, and that is all much much better than whatever else for a moment you felt like doing, like one outing with you friends, or flirting with a guy or whatever, because even if you do get to do this, it will be just once and twice before wanting to go back to your boyfriend and you'll find that this is not you, but you belong to being with him,and that's where your happy.
I hope i helped, but if you need to talk more or if there are any updates, please be free to contact me. Best of luck!
]
Personally, I think everyone feels like this from time to time in a relationship. It doesn't mean take a break, It's part of being committed and being in a relationship. If you need too go out with your friends, Make plans etc. It's good to have time to yourself and with friends. Just because someone has a boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean you need to sell your soul to them and be around them 24.7 you are still entitled to having your own social life too. This could very well be the issue, Also keep in mind that you are young. A lot of people think it's healthy to date different people, Experience new things etc. Do I think so..well I'm not going to say yes and I'm not going to say no. This is up to you, You either want to be in a relationship or you don't. If you don't you need to tell him. Communicating is the key. YOU need to decide what you want. If you need a break for awhile then take one.
]
More Questions: |